Endless Curiosity

[Azuldrgon]

Have you told your partner about all of your past relationships? If so, was it full disclosure or just the highlights? If not, what keeps you from sharing?

Long story.
Yes.....and then she fucked up by not telling me about her play partners when she discovered the internet. Once she was found out, it took a while to trust her enough again.

Now, we can do things online and share general things as long as we remember who our #1's are.


Oh, and she never comes on here, but she knows about it. She has also never read any of my stories either.

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

*full disclosure*

I ate chocolate cake for supper.

 

[Azuldrgon]

*full disclosure*

I ate chocolate cake for supper.

full disclosure-frozen pizza. lol

 

[Endless_Night]

*full disclosure*

I ate chocolate cake for supper.

full disclosure-frozen pizza. lol

Full disclosure.

Skipped dinner entirely and having a stout. Loooooong day.

 

[Azuldrgon]

Full disclosure.

Skipped dinner entirely and having a stout. Loooooong day.

Hope tomorrow is better.

 

[Endless_Night]

Hope tomorrow is better.

Me too! It will be.

 

[Endless_Night]

And a little something for MF and Mrs. MF. Who should be safely tucked into bed by now.

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/39/1c/71/391c71c267bd0a65986f521c285aa55b.jpg

 

[ViciousTease]

A question from one of our Litsters:

I'm new to Lit and would like to find a play partner, but posting in the personals is too intimidating. What are some other ways to find a partner?

I realize some of the regulars here don't play. But, have you ever? When you did, how did you find that certain someone? I'm assuming our contributor is looking for more than a one-and-done. So how do you, or how have you found a good fit?

For those of you that like to keep dalliances private, this is a great time to knock the dust off of your alt and share your wisdom in secret.

 

[OldUncleJack]

I was lucky - i had chatted to my kitten under my previous incarnation, and spotted her again as OUJ. By pure coincidence, she was visiting oxford the same day as me...simples!



As far as LittleBitOfme was concerned..(remember her?) I PMd her about her avatar. We got chatting but i was very respectful - no rudery at first. i gained her confidence and trust..and well most of you know the rest!

 

[Mindfondler]

A question from one of our Litsters:

I'm new to Lit and would like to find a play partner, but posting in the personals is too intimidating. What are some other ways to find a partner?

I realize some of the regulars here don't play. But, have you ever? When you did, how did you find that certain someone? I'm assuming our contributor is looking for more than a one-and-done. So how do you, or how have you found a good fit?

For those of you that like to keep dalliances private, this is a great time to knock the dust off of your alt and share your wisdom in secret.

I'll happily put my hand up and recount my experiences! I'd hesitate to call it wisdom, though.

As I've described elsewhere, Mrs MF and I have been searching for kinky play partners (both together and individually) for about a year now. It isn't easy to find a match (especially a local one), but we're sure that it can be done. We've met some lovely ladies who haven't yet been quite right for us (or vice versa), but they've all been real and sincere, so it does seem to be only a matter of time and persistence.

If you don't want to post a personals ad, then one obvious option is to reply to one instead. Okay, you're still breaking cover, but only with one person rather than the whole of Lit (or wherever). Of course, this assumes that you can find an advert that you like from someone who seems compatible. That brings me on to my next point...

Regardless of how you seek a play partner, it's important that you know what you're looking for before you start to screen possible options. That might sound obvious, but I've noticed how often people seem to ask for things in a play partner that ought not to matter. Depending on the type of play, physical attractiveness might be relevant, but age, height, experience, hair colour — are those really more important than finding someone with a compatible temperament, values, sense of humour and other non-physical attributes? So often, people seem to filter out on the basis of the former without considering the latter.

If personals ads aren't the answer, then I think my previous point suggests a general solution. Find other ways of meeting compatible people! You could do that by finding hangouts for people with compatible temperaments, values, senses of humour etc (and then probing for interest in play) or by finding those for people who enjoy the type of play that interests you (and then screening those interested on the basis of personal qualities).

Finally, you could "put out the word" amongst friends in suitable communities (see above) that you're looking for someone. I met Mrs MF through a mutual friend, and it's inconceivable that I would have done it any other way. That's the power of connections.

Those are just a few random thoughts off the top of my head, but I hope they're of some value.
.

 

[ViciousTease]

I just want to say thanks to OUJ and MF for responding. Great stuff, guys!!

I've been trying to type a reply to this one for about half an hour and I am wearing out the backspace button. I'm obviously going to need to give it some thought.

I will say that personal ads frustrate me to no end. They all seem to be written by men and women with little or no post count. Are they alts? If so, responding is a terrifying thought. Are they truly not active on the boards? I am, so that's not going to work.

Off to think ...

 

[ThirdShift]

I always found the playground in school intimidating. It seemed everyone already had their circles. And while I have a roundish stature, I don't easily fit into circles.

 

[OldUncleJack]

I always found the playground in school intimidating. It seemed everyone already had their circles. And while I have a roundish stature, I don't easily fit into circles.

it can be cliquey, i agree...you have to persevere!

 

[ThirdShift]

it can be cliquey, i agree...you have to persevere!

Which isn't always easy. Depending on reasons for being here, availability for being here, free time to be here. And yet, there is the potential for a desire to find or be found, and to be seen as worthwhile, but if post counts or visibility is the criteria... well, that might leave a good catch out in the dust.

 

[OldUncleJack]

Which isn't always easy. Depending on reasons for being here, availability for being here, free time to be here. And yet, there is the potential for a desire to find or be found, and to be seen as worthwhile, but if post counts or visibility is the criteria... well, that might leave a good catch out in the dust.

well filling in your profile will help - tell us about you...what you are looking for!

 

[ThirdShift]

well filling in your profile will help - tell us about you...what you are looking for!

In good time....

 

[ydahecnot]

Just participate on the board of your choice and let you come through. To put it in math terms, people want a statistically significant sample of you

 

[sassygirlisback]

Just participate on the board of your choice and let you come through. To put it in math terms, people want a statistically significant sample of you

That just turned me on.

 

[ydahecnot]

Everyone will eventually regress to the mean, and you'll get a true picture

 

[ThirdShift]

well filling in your profile will help - tell us about you...what you are looking for!

Done.

 

[OldUncleJack]

Done.

Good work!

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

A question from one of our Litsters:

I'm new to Lit and would like to find a play partner, but posting in the personals is too intimidating. What are some other ways to find a partner?

I realize some of the regulars here don't play. But, have you ever? When you did, how did you find that certain someone? I'm assuming our contributor is looking for more than a one-and-done. So how do you, or how have you found a good fit?

For those of you that like to keep dalliances private, this is a great time to knock the dust off of your alt and share your wisdom in secret.

Just wanted to point out that I *clearly * can be of no help whatsoever in this discussion.

 

[Endless_Night]

Just participate on the board of your choice and let you come through. To put it in math terms, people want a statistically significant sample of you

That just turned me on.

Everyone will eventually regress to the mean, and you'll get a true picture

Math flirting. Hawt.

 

[Endless_Night]

I’m just going to be me, because…limited play.

Besides, I’ve always been approached. One of the benefits of being a girl, on and off Lit. Good thing, too, considering I am…errr…sort of non directive when it comes to sex.

Anyhoo, to get back on track….

Board interaction that leads into PMs seems to be the most common mode. A little flirting, a discovery of compatibility, and voila!

From the occasional state of my PM box I’d say cold PMing is another avenue. I’ll say up front that most of them are awful! There’ve been one or two that took trouble and piqued my interest, or would have if I’d been available for play. Trouble doesn’t necessarily mean long and wordy, btw. Funny, one liners are more apt to catch my attention than anything too serious. Too much, too early can be

As to personal ads, I get the reluctance. Potential inbox explosion aside, it could be an issue if you maintain a board presence. What if a regular hits you up and you have no interest? All kinds of awkward potential. An alt ad might be a possibility, I suppose. I’ve seen one or two I’ve wondered about…

*squints suspiciously*

Tricky, though. It would require some pretty quick confessing if you met someone you liked!

That’s all I got.

 

[Endless_Night]

Just wanted to point out that I *clearly * can be of no help whatsoever in this discussion.

Aw, c'mon on. I refuse to believe you have heard no tales of...tales of...tales of... *insert positive euphemism*