Endless Curiosity

[Azuldrgon]

Hahahahahahahaha!

are you gonna answer Eny?

 

[JennyNo1]

Hahahahahahahaha!

are you gonna answer Eny?

Yeah, enny. 'Fess up time!

 

[Azuldrgon]

You don't have to do the bonus, but at least answer the other part Eny.....we're here for you.

 

[Endless_Night]

Okay. *deep breath*

Ummm. Well, it would never have occurred that my innate sexual proclivities could be inspired, or at least influenced, by someone else. I would have said no. Unequivocally no. I’ve always had very specific ideas on what interested me, what did not, and where my limits lay. (lie? )

But….

In the right circumstance, it seems that I am, ahem, heavily influenced by a partner.


Bonus: The submission end of D/s. Apparently there are different levels of submission.

Who knew.

 

[JennyNo1]

Okay. *deep breath*

Ummm. Well, it would never have occurred that my innate sexual proclivities could be inspired, or at least influenced, by someone else. I would have said no. Unequivocally no. I’ve always had very specific ideas on what interested me, what did not, and where my limits lay. (lie? )

But….

In the right circumstance, it seems that I am, ahem, heavily influenced by a partner.


Bonus: The submission end of D/s. Apparently there are different levels of submission.

Who knew.

Have you ever read Stella Omega's thing about different levels of D/s? It's a sticky on the BDSM board. Pretty interesting.

 

[Azuldrgon]

Okay. *deep breath*

Ummm. Well, it would never have occurred that my innate sexual proclivities could be inspired, or at least influenced, by someone else. I would have said no. Unequivocally no. I’ve always had very specific ideas on what interested me, what did not, and where my limits lay. (lie? )

But….

In the right circumstance, it seems that I am, ahem, heavily influenced by a partner.


Bonus: The submission end of D/s. Apparently there are different levels of submission.

Who knew.

*hugs* I am very proud of you.
That was very brave.

 

[Endless_Night]

Have you ever read Stella Omega's thing about different levels of D/s? It's a sticky on the BDSM board. Pretty interesting.

I have. Interesting, but I have to say it confused my greatly when I first did the read. For a long time I thought I was a dominant bottom. Not so much.

But what I'm talking about is the submission itself. It...varies. I've had two D/s partners. I thought I was submitting to the first one, but in retrospect, I see how very limited that submission was. Surprising. Errr...on a lot of levels.

*hugs* I am very proud of you.
That was very brave.

Thanks.

 

[Endless_Night]

Aaaaaaaaand, after reading through yesterday's commentary, I clearly need more toy experience.

Clearly.

 

[Azuldrgon]

I have. Interesting, but I have to say it confused my greatly when I first did the read. For a long time I thought I was a dominant bottom. Not so much.

But what I'm talking about is the submission itself. It...varies. I've had two D/s partners. I thought I was submitting to the first one, but in retrospect, I see how very limited that submission was. Surprising. Errr...on a lot of levels.

The one thing people assume is that the Dom has total power over the sub. It's not the case. The sub actually holds all the power because he/she allows the Dom to push their limits. It's very difficult for someone to be totally submissive, but it helps when a sub is open enough and honest enough to let the Dom know his/her limits. Communication is a total necessity with that.

Confession I never knew I had the desire to dom until a sub recruited me and taught me. I have learned much more over the years. I will probably erase this line later because it's a little too close to home.

 

[Lunation]

It seems the shop has been left untended again. So, don't mind me while I loot the place.

We all have our own sexual preferences, kinks, fetishes, and what have you. Did you come by yours honestly, or were they inspired by a partner?

Bonus: what is the preference?

My preferences are heavily partner influenced. I have a few worth noting.

Tattoos. I love women with tattoos. My first was practically covered. Loved them ever since.

Pregnancy/impregnation. The best sex in my marriage was during this time. Never had a thing for pregnant women before. Now I totally do.

Dominance/submission. I've always been aware of it, of course. But I thought it was a game. A spice to be added on top. But I have learned what it is like to truly have that as a need. Not just sexual but also emotional and all...wrapped up into one. Two halves, equal and opposite. ...yeah.

 

[Endless_Night]

The one thing people assume is that the Dom has total power over the sub. It's not the case. The sub actually holds all the power because he/she allows the Dom to push their limits. It's very difficult for someone to be totally submissive, but it helps when a sub is open enough and honest enough to let the Dom know his/her limits. Communication is a total necessity with that.

< snipped in case you decide to remove. >

This^. Also the emotional aspect. So intense. So...revealing, on a personal level. Something of a revelation all around.

 

[Azuldrgon]

This^. Also the emotional aspect. So intense. So...revealing, on a personal level. Something of a revelation all around.

It's something hard to mimic really. The fact that someone trusts you enough to let you in and allow you that levity.....And the thing is it's not something that just happens either.

Over the years I have had a few partners that it clicked in right away and some that it didn't. It's not for everyone. The nonsense surrounding the Fifty Shades stuff just made it more mainstream, but it was never meant to be that way. It was meant to be a private dynamic between the two....something special....

 

[SassySheDevil]

Knowledge can be a terrible burden.

Yeah, so, that's out.

"Honey why were you vacuuming at 2am last night? Also, didn't take you very long."

haha and if you buy the corded version. That can add to the "Pain in the ass" part. It can limit where you want to partake in this fun.

 

[Suz_anne]

It seems the shop has been left untended again. So, don't mind me while I loot the place.

We all have our own sexual preferences, kinks, fetishes, and what have you. Did you come by yours honestly, or were they inspired by a partner?

Bonus: what is the preference?

Most I have come by honestly through playing with partners and also some from porn. I did have one relationship that rocked my little sexual fetish world. It's not so much that he uncovered a lot of new territory, but more in the way he implemented my kinks. It was absolute perfection. And it taught me a lot about how important nuance is to kink.

 

[Endless_Night]

It's something hard to mimic really. The fact that someone trusts you enough to let you in and allow you that levity.....And the thing is it's not something that just happens either.

Over the years I have had a few partners that it clicked in right away and some that it didn't. It's not for everyone. The nonsense surrounding the Fifty Shades stuff just made it more mainstream, but it was never meant to be that way. It was meant to be a private dynamic between the two....something special....

Agreed. I think it's more partner specific than anything, though certainly having the proclivity is fundamental. Limited experience on my end, but I think that "extra" just clicks or it doesn't. Certainly not for everyone! It's not the easiest way to achieve sexual gratification, but the gratification received does seem to be...ummm...exceptional.

Perhaps because it combines the physical with the emotional in an unusual combination. Lots of layers. Depth.

 

[Azuldrgon]

Agreed. I think it's more partner specific than anything, though certainly having the proclivity is fundamental. Limited experience on my end, but I think that "extra" just clicks or it doesn't. Certainly not for everyone! It's not the easiest way to achieve sexual gratification, but the gratification received does seem to be...ummm...exceptional.

Perhaps because it combines the physical with the emotional in an unusual combination. Lots of layers. Depth.

I like my relationships to have depth. I'm not much of a one night stand kind of person. I like partners to be friends first so we have more to talk about besides sex. There's more to a person than their sexual parts.

 

[Bjerget]

We all have our own sexual preferences, kinks, fetishes, and what have you. Did you come by yours honestly, or were they inspired by a partner?

Bonus: what is the preference?

(First post here, hope this is okay for a start)

I think most of my kinks were developed from a young age by growing up with perverted friends and siblings, and having easy access to porno mags and filthy smutty talk. There were few moments that we didn't talk about that stuff, unless we were playing pvp video games, or experimenting with things.

My preference is for group sex. I like guys and girls so a big, hot naked pile is just the thing for me.

 

[Azuldrgon]

(First post here, hope this is okay for a start)

I think most of my kinks were developed from a young age by growing up with perverted friends and siblings, and having easy access to porno mags and filthy smutty talk. There were few moments that we didn't talk about that stuff, unless we were playing pvp video games, or experimenting with things.

My preference is for group sex. I like guys and girls so a big, hot naked pile is just the thing for me.

Hi Little One.

 

[Endless_Night]

Hi Shiva. Welcome to the thread!

 

[Lunation]

Wait, play dough was discovered by accident?

I feel the thread needs to come back to this point.

One of the true "Eureka!" moments in science.

 

[Bjerget]

Hi Little One.

Hi Shiva. Welcome to the thread!

Thanks to you both

 

[Farawyn]

The one thing people assume is that the Dom has total power over the sub. It's not the case. The sub actually holds all the power because he/she allows the Dom to push their limits. It's very difficult for someone to be totally submissive, but it helps when a sub is open enough and honest enough to let the Dom know his/her limits. Communication is a total necessity with that.

Confession I never knew I had the desire to dom until a sub recruited me and taught me. I have learned much more over the years. I will probably erase this line later because it's a little too close to home.

I have to say I disagree strongly.
Not with the communication part. Of course there should be. It's a relationship, whether casual or intense, and both parties should know limits. This goes for ANY relationship. It's not exclusive to BDSM.

The sub does NOT hold all the power. The whole point of BDSM is the sub lets go of her power.
Just because the sub communicates limits does not mean she/he holds the power.

Also, it's not difficult to be submissive sexually at all, if that's what you are, and you are with the right person.
It feels to me like a duck in water.

 

[barefootgirl69]

The one thing people assume is that the Dom has total power over the sub. It's not the case. The sub actually holds all the power because he/she allows the Dom to push their limits. It's very difficult for someone to be totally submissive, but it helps when a sub is open enough and honest enough to let the Dom know his/her limits. Communication is a total necessity with that.

Confession I never knew I had the desire to dom until a sub recruited me and taught me. I have learned much more over the years. I will probably erase this line later because it's a little too close to home.

Hold up! If the Dom doesn't have power, then there has been no power exchange, therefore, no submission.

I am tired of this saying "the submissive is really in control". No. No we aren't, and if we are, then there is no submission, only a roleplay. I am not the only submissive having trouble with people who spout this. Our submission is real. We don't want power. When we enter a relationship, yes there are conversations taking place between us - our expectations of one another, our limits - and trust me, Doms have limits just like submissives.

Entering that relationship means I am giving up my power. All of it. I hold no power, I don't any power or control. What would be the point of submitting if I still held all the keys to the kingdom?

And, don't even get me started on "submission is a gift that is bestowed on the Dom"... that's another thing that irks me.

 

[Azuldrgon]

I have to say I disagree strongly.
Not with the communication part. Of course there should be. It's a relationship, whether casual or intense, and both parties should know limits. This goes for ANY relationship. It's not exclusive to BDSM.

The sub does NOT hold all the power. The whole point of BDSM is the sub lets go of her power.
Just because the sub communicates limits does not mean she/he holds the power.

Also, it's not difficult to be submissive sexually at all, if that's what you are, and you are with the right person.
It feels to me like a duck in water.

Hi.

Okay, point taken. You are correct in that the sub releases power to the Dom. And that for some it does come naturally......but....that doesn't give the Dom carte blanche to push past a certain point.

Case in point: let's say I had a partner who tells me initially that she will not perform Anal at any costs. I can tease her during oral per se just to feel it out. I can rub against her just to let her see how my member feels against her just to see how she reacts. But I do not enter unless she allows me to. In my mind, it's a limit that I have to be permitted to pass. Otherwise, I lose her trust if she still is adamant about no booty sex.

There are different dynamics to any dynamic. What works for you doesn't necessarily work for every couple and not ever D/s relationship is the same. Maybe in one relationship, the Dom can shoot past the hard limits and get away with it. It doesn't work that way with me and that's all I can base my opinions on.

 

[Farawyn]

Hi.

Okay, point taken. You are correct in that the sub releases power to the Dom. And that for some it does come naturally......but....that doesn't give the Dom carte blanche to push past a certain point.

Case in point: let's say I had a partner who tells me initially that she will not perform Anal at any costs. I can tease her during oral per se just to feel it out. I can rub against her just to let her see how my member feels against her just to see how she reacts. But I do not enter unless she allows me to. In my mind, it's a limit that I have to be permitted to pass. Otherwise, I lose her trust if she still is adamant about no booty sex.

There are different dynamics to any dynamic. What works for you doesn't necessarily work for every couple and not ever D/s relationship is the same. Maybe in one relationship, the Dom can shoot past the hard limits and get away with it. It doesn't work that way with me and that's all I can base my opinions on.

If a hard limit is set, it's a hard limit. You don't push.