Filthy answers to innocent questions.

[Tio_Narratore]

Vegetarians will swallow.

When do the swallows return to Capistrano?

As soon as the phalaropes cum.

Would you like a string of pearls?

 

[AlinaX]

I think they would become me.

What exactly is a jiggle?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

I think they would become me.

What exactly is a jiggle?

It's a diminutive version of a traditional Irish dance where the female dancer is topless and the male bare-bottomed, and both bounce up and down in time to the tune of a fiddle and the rhythm of a bodhran. It's more commonly referred to as 'a little jig' in offers or suggestions to dance, as in "let's do a little jig."

What is a bodhran?

 

[bbcbarry9033]

It's a diminutive version of a traditional Irish dance where the female dancer is topless and the male bare-bottomed, and both bounce up and down in time to the tune of a fiddle and the rhythm of a bodhran. It's more commonly referred to as 'a little jig' in offers or suggestions to dance, as in "let's do a little jig."

What is a bodhran?

It's formal French for running a train, or more precicely, it's in the past tense, i.e. having run a train. For context: "Je suis did bodhran le petit slut with mes bros last evening!"

... or is it Turkish?

 

[NEOhio1972]

It's formal French for running a train, or more precicely, it's in the past tense, i.e. having run a train. For context: "Je suis did bodhran le petit slut with mes bros last evening!"

... or is it Turkish?

Nope. Definitely French. The Turkish version has midgets....

What is French for "I have to pee?..."

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Nope. Definitely French. The Turkish version has midgets....

What is French for "I have to pee?..."

It actually refers to a head topping (toupée, en français, S.V.P.) for bald men to wear during watersports.

What is actually?

 

[MargotPayge]

What is actually?

The concept of existence has been discussed extensively by every branch of philosophy, but the best definition is by sexistentialist philosopher Swollen Kinkigard, "I fuck; therefore I am."

What would Plato do?

 

[Bamagan]

The concept of existence has been discussed extensively by every branch of philosophy, but the best definition is by sexistentialist philosopher Swollen Kinkigard, "I fuck; therefore I am."

What would Plato do?

Ideally, fuck his way through the entire Republic.

What is the Socratic Method?

 

[LiverpoolMaster]

Ideally, fuck his way through the entire Republic.

What is the Socratic Method?

Preferably fuck the assembled female students before the hemlock course rather than after.

Who was largely responsible for the dipthongisation of free tonic vowels in Middle French?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Ideally, fuck his way through the entire Republic.

What is the Socratic Method?

A technique of enquiry for determining one's partner's sexual preference. It requires going through the 169 basic sex positions and questioning your partner about each one as you try it.

Where do butterflies come from?

 

[MargotPayge]

Preferably fuck the assembled female students before the hemlock course rather than after.

Who was largely responsible for the dipthongisation of free tonic vowels in Middle French?

Isabeau "deep throat" D'arcy, The most talented fellatrix in history, could not form consonants because her mouth was always full.

I'll go with Tio's question. even though he was late to the party.

 

[AlinaX]

I keep finding them in my panties, so maybe that's a clue.

Where is Mr Darcy?

 

[MargotPayge]

I keep finding them in my panties, so maybe that's a clue.

Where is Mr Darcy?

In Isabeau's mouth, obviously.

Where is the cabbage patch?

 

[AlinaX]

In Isabeau's mouth, obviously.

Where is the cabbage patch?

Oh, please, be nice.

What's the point of Mondays?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Oh, please, be nice.

What's the point of Mondays?

Mondays mark the end of the weekend orgy and the start of preparations for the next weekends debauchery.

Why mistletoe?

 

[AlinaX]

Because there's just something deliciously teasing about blowing softly on someone's feet.

What is witch hazel?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Because there's just something deliciously teasing about blowing softly on someone's feet.

What is witch hazel?

It's a question often asked of clients at the House of the Rising Sun. Client's will say they've been told to pick Hazel if they want a real good blow job, and the Madam will reply "Which Hazel?"

Why is it called the House of the Rising Sun?

 

[Nutbutterbish]

'Cause I make that Cock, rise, son That was easy.

 Does your future look bright?

 

[Bamagan]

 Does your future look bright?

No, but it's still a good idea to squint before it comes, for safety reasons.

What kind of woman makes the best wife?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

No, but it's still a good idea to squint before it comes, for safety reasons.

What kind of woman makes the best wife?

A dominatrix is your best bet for making your wife the best.

Why is a wife called 'the better half?'

 

[Bamagan]

A dominatrix is your best bet for making your wife the best.

Why is a wife called 'the better half?'

The expression dates back to the reign of King Solomon, who was asked to settle a dispute involving a woman who had allegedly married two men. Both desired her and neither was willing to relinquish his claim, so the king told them to cut her in two. One husband was a breast man and the other an ass man, so they both believed that they would go home with the better half. (This annoyed the king so he split all three of them vertically in spite.)

What kind of culture thinks suggesting human bisection is a sign of wisdom?

 

[AlinaX]

Of course, Christianity took it one step further and started dividing people in three. ETA: The holy trinity of mouth, ass and cunt, naturally.

What is a spirit?

 

[Rustyoznail]

What is a spirit?

A liquid with the divine qualities of making clothing disappear.

Cream or sugar?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Sartre or de Beauvoir? Or both? I'll have mine without cream, sugar.

What is mine?

 

[Bamagan]

Sartre or de Beauvoir? Or both? I'll have mine without cream, sugar.

What is mine?

Reports vary, but most people suggest you eschew more typical euphemisms like 'dick' or 'cock' in favor of 'Wank Wand,' 'Blow Stick,' and 'Brat Cannon.'

Where have all the stick shifts gone?