Holy hole in the plot batman!

[Jacobo_Curious]

The party at the bar was so great even the great promoters of Justice, Kim Kap Hwan and Ken Masters, decided they ought to come and check things out. Since the fourty bimbos really had no idea what to do, they found themselves dancing around and even serving drinks. It was a lot of fun for everyone -- until the neighbors complained. Then the police came, then they saw what was going on, and with the excuse of "Hey, Batman's here, everything's okay!" they joined in. Then the neighbors came over to see what the fuss was all about, and then they joined in too. The partying was intense, and the bartender finally was able to fill up the building he had bought.

He knew that being a hangout for Dr. Evil would pay off someday. He didn't really think it'd have anything to do with the ex-porn stars he hired, though.

Dr. Evil wasn't very pleased, however. Even so, chatting with Dark Helmet amiably, he was pleased to find another "evil genius" with the same bad luck. They both sobbed in their beer.

Austin Powers, of course, was far too busy occupying ten of the forty bimbos to care about Dr. Evil.

Drunken men plowed everywhere, hooting and cheering on the bimbos and taking them aside several times, more than a couple of the men now drunk and brave enough to take some of the oblivious women out back to... play hopscotch. No, really. I love that game. Don't you? The bartender does too. That's why he has a hopscotch court out back.

Anyway, the drunken men were plowing everywhere, and then men started grabbing Catwoman and pushing her up to one of the poles to start dancing, assuming that her tight outfit was some sort of stripper costume. She was only mildly irritated, until they started grabbing her butt.

Meanwhile, outside of the bar, the Dark Magician Girl and the Harlequin Hussy peered inside, the beautiful red-haired villain trying to keep her frustration and anger in check.

"Well, it IS a bit late for lunch," admitted the Dark Magician. "Maybe we could have a midnight snack here, though." She pointed inside at all the many naked, busty women, and then pointed at themselves in their current attire. "We'd fit in fairly well, at least. I'm sure those ladies have left some spare clothes somewhere they can lend us." She smiled. "It sounds good to me!"

Tossing her blonde hair, the Dark Magician Girl grabbed her string-bikini-clad friend and pulled her along, opening the doors and dancing in cheerfully.

It was quite attractive.

Though, of course, so were the forty naked women.

 

[hybirdx]

Meanwhile, in the lake near the bar. Somebody was slowly dragging himself out of the lake. "Damn... Forget it... I didn't run from Zeon just to get killed again... I need an drink!"

 

[Jacobo_Curious]

The Dark Magician Girl twirled the still bewildered but now happy Harlequin Hussy around on the dance floor, attempting to avoid the pinches of the drunks around at delicate parts of their anatomy. Still, the tangerine string bikinis did allow for easy movement across the dance floor.

"Haha!" giggled the Dark Magician. "I haven't had this much fun in... well, since the last time I blew something up!"

"But that was five minutes ago!" shouted the Harlequin Hussy over the loud beat.

"Yeah, well, still!"

Meanwhile, the Cat Woman was still being pressured to dance. She feebly protested, but both Kit and Kat were cheering her on, too...

Oddler stumbled up to the bar. Ah, here, he could get a drink...

And he was hit by an invisible airplane, sending him flying down the street, even MORE bruised and battered.

Wonder Woman got out, and charged into the bar.

"Look here!" she cried. "I'm an Amazon, and will not allow for this terrible treatment of women! Look, Cat Woman obviously does not want to dance for you people! She's a career woman, even if she is a villain! Women are just as capable as men in professions of any kind! You all know that!"

Suddenly sober and ashamed of themselves, the drunken crowd nodded.

There was a pause.

"Still," mused Wonder Woman, "that DOES look like fun."

The drunken crowded cheered wildly as the Amazon jumped up to one of the poles can began to strip down, dancing wildly as she did so.

 

[Veryknowing]

A vast, utterly huge, gigantic, phenomenally enormous, I mean really really very very very big gargantuan door opened on the other side of the Universe......and God stepped out for LUNCH.

Suddenly, back on Mongo, Ming the Merciless noticed that the dial on his Reality-Destabilizer Hyperbolic Array slipped into the redline.....all by itself.

Flashing lights and warning signs lit-up all the control boards, "WARNING...COSMIC BALANCE NOW THREATENED....HYPERBOLIC OVERLOAD!"

Ming the Merciless stood up, strode over to the great machine, and gave it an almighty kick.

The alarms and flashing lights went silent.

"That's better", he muttered, "One of these days I'll have to get that thing replaced. Does that everyday at noon, and none of the technical experts can ever work out why!"

He sat back down in his easy chair, and went back to enjoying the plotlines unravel on Earth on his televisor.

 

[cats]

Batman

IC: "Bartender! Double scoth on the rocks." Batman winked sujestively at catwoman. "I love a drunk woman." Just then men grabed her and began to push her up at the stage. She was strugleing to avoid danceing but found herself up on the stage. Batman looked down disapointed and wispered. "I can't even get with a striper dressed like her. I guess james is the only one for me."

Wonderwoman busted threw the door. Batman dived under the table. Standing up an amazon on a date was the dumbest thing he had done since... well the thing before that. Hideing under the table he stared out at her while she made a touching speech. "What have I done all this time I've been after girls just for there looks... whats wrong with that?"

Then the amazon princes started to dance sudctivle at one of the pools. "Must be a stripper right robin?.... Robin?..." Batman looked around. "Oh thats right he's not here he's on a date with Barbra Gordin." He sat back up and pulled catwoman back to his lap. "I got you that drink."

 

[Jacobo_Curious]

Somewhere else in Gotham, the Samurai Pizza Cats delivered a pizza.

But theirs is another story.

 

[poohlive]

A haughty british man in distinguised attire stepped into the limelight, eyeing his surroundings.
"And now for something completely different."
He left.

(Yeah, that's right. I did it!!!!)

 

[hybirdx]

Oddler draged himself in the bar, grumbling. Nobody noticed Oddler because they were having too much fun. Though, he liked it that way, Oddler felt a little bit of an outcast. He sat down at the bar and put his head down on his arm. "Ale... And make it bitter."

"You have to be pretty stronge to drink that stuff kid!"

Oddler raised his head, his eyes were crimson red "I can take it kid.. I'm much older than I look..."

 

[cats]

Batman / Dick

IC: Dick:now this seemes a little weird dicky but please put it on for me." Barbra made her eyes big and wide as she pleaded with Dick Gacon. "Do I really have to put on the entire thing. I don't really care for Batman." "Oh I supose you don't like batgirl or robin either." "Well to be honest I like Robin but thats comepletely difrent from not likeing batman."

"Tell you what Dicky. You put that on and I'll dress up as who ever you want." Dick gracons eyes opened wide he knew exactly who he was going to make her dress up as. Batgirl he had been trying to seduce her for years but she never seemed to pay any atention to him.

"I got a batgirl costume in my room." Barbra thought for a minute, what where the odds her boyfreind had a thing for the side of her she hides. Oh well how bad could the costume be? She had the actul one and liked wearing it. "Deal."

IC: Batman: It had been an hour or so, and both batman and catwoman were hiting the drinks pretty hard. "And on the way of here, gosh you smell nice, oh yea, and on the way over here, I saw a gaint water Mellon." Batman smiled and called for another drink.

"I'm kinda hungry now.... you want to go and find that mellon." He looked down to her top. "Dang you got big mellons. "

 

[Veryknowing]

Ming the Merciless was getting irritable.

Almost nothing was going on now.

On his Wide-Screen Surround-Sound Televisor, most of the major heros and villains of Earth were relaxing and enjoying themselves in a bar. Some had been drinking there for hours. The strip show wasn't so bad, with Wonder Woman (he made a mental note to add her to his harem sometime soon), and the forty naked beach bimbos were nice to look at.

Everybody was having way too much fun.

And he, Ming the Merciless, wasn't!

 

[little_golden]

Lunch.....

The Harlequin Hussy was absorbed by the quickness of events and simply stuttered as she watched the final destruction of her beautiful yacht.

"Lunch? Lunch!!!? Lunch!!!!" she screamed out at the top of her lungs at the Dark Magician Girl.

"Well.... what were you thinking a restaurant or fast food?"

 

[Jacobo_Curious]

"I was thinking they have something to eat here!" the Dark Magician Girl cried cheerfully. "But even if they don't, at least the dancing is good!"

As the Dark Magician Girl twirled her scantily clad partner around, they began to receive some hoots and cheers as well. Sometimes a very lightly clothed woman is even better than a naked woman.

"Them's some damn fine bitches, yo," said Kim Kap Hwan, Paragon of Justice, as he passed his joint to his buddy.

"Hell yeah," agreed Ken Masters, before taking a puff.

Oddler had not yet been noticed, fortunately. Meanwhile, Dr. Evil and Dark Helmet continued to cry in their beer over their various troubles while Austin Powers freakdanced with about fifteen women simultaneously...

...Because he's

Just.

That.

Bad.

Batman continued to try and seduce Catwoman, and far far away, Robin was having the time of his life.

All in all, it was a great party, and more people kept coming. The policemen even donated their donuts.

But a shadow began to fall over the city of Gotham, as terror approached...

 

[hybirdx]

Oddler taken a sip of Ale and shuddered a bit "Strong... But not strong enough!" He said to himself as he taken another sip. He then looked over at the Dark Magician girl "She's here..." Oddler just smiled and turned back to his drink "Like I care..." He said just before he chuged the rest of his drink, and paid the bartender.

He stood in the corner at the time and closed his eyes "I never been able to get along with people... so why am I here? Because of that girl? Ha! I seen harpys better looking!!!"

 

[Veryknowing]

Ming The Merciless had enough!

He'd watched them enjoy themselves, and he wasn't having any fun!

So he decided to do something about it.

"Admiral! Ready my space-cruiser!", Ming yelled, "Organize the fleet...We're going to invade Earth! I've had enough of being subtle."

 

[kamalw1]

NORAD Headquarters, Colorado

"Colonel, there is a huge incoming ship that just appeared on radar, and it looks like a giant..."

 

[Veryknowing]

The Imperial Fleet of Mongo was enormous, tens of thousands of space-cruisers, spaceships-of-the-line, space-frigates, space-carriers (with extra space onboard), space-transports (moving even more space around space), space-dreadnoughts, space-submarines, space-destroyers (useful for getting rid of excess space), space-tugs (they pull space around), even just regular space-ships.

The entire fleet was heading towards Earth, with tens of millions of Ming's finest soldiers onboard.

Before they could reach Earth however, they encountered another enormous armada of vessels; flying-saucers from Mars. Both fleets were intent of conquering Earth, but this sort of thing was annoying.

Something had to be done about this.

So Emperor Ming and the Supreme Ruler of the Martians both called upon a neutral person of importance that both could agree on. They weren't going to give the chosen personage much choice however.

 

[little_golden]

HH

The Harlequin Hussy looked around... it was a mess of people dancing, eating, drinking and chatting up a storm.

"Dark Magician Girl - where do you want to sit?" she asked during a break in the music...

 

[Emotionless]

The Heart of Gold Spaceship entered realspace and began orbit around a watery planet who's ape-like inhabitants were presently all making thier collective way to a certain bar with rather permissive dress codes.

The revolutionary Improbability Drive pinged importantly and the computer screen read of it's statistics. "Odds of any of this ridiculous thread actually occuring are 100 000 000 876 to 1."

Elsewhere on the bridge, an overly friendly and helpful door opened with a cheerful "Thanks ever so much for making use of me, and have a super day!"

It's user was grumpy, he had been awoken from a dream in wich his planet hadn't been demolished to make way for and intergalactic by-pass. "Shut up, door." mumbled Arthur Dent.

Moving to the view port, Arthur noticed a watery planet with ape-like inhabitants of with he happened to be one. "T-t-thats Earth!" he sputtered. "But the Vogans destroyed it!"

"Maybe they made a new one while you were messing about in the Universal Enormity Vortex." said Ford Prefect, Arthur's friend who happened to be from Alpha Centuri.

"Who cares," muttered Marvin the depressed Andriod. "It'll just get blown up again anyway."

"Woo Wee!" Shouted the other occupant of the ship. "Looks like that'll be a lot sooner then you think, cool cats!" Zaphod Beeblebrox, the Untill-Recently-Presedent of the Universe, was saying. One head regarding the two men and the android, the other head looking at the radard screen.

Arthur asked "What do you mean?"

"What I mean, monkey man, is that there are two armada's out there ready to fight over who gets to blow up the zoo down there." Zaphod replyed.

"Oh not again!" shouted Arthur

"Told you, but who listens to me anyway?" remarked Marvin

"Who are they anyway?" wondered Ford

"Stay cool, kids. They're about to start shooting." advised Zaphod



(ooc: Damn right I brough Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy in. The funniest trillogy of five ever! Anyone who hasn't read it is very misfourtuneate and i implore you to do so post haste.)

 

[Jacobo_Curious]

Panting heavily, the Dark Magician Girl wiped her hand on her forehead, and then wiped her hand on her clothes -- at least, she tired to, before realizing that her tangerine string bikini didn't have any room to wipe on.

"Well, I dunno," she responded, her arms around the Harlequin Hussy as they danced. "I'm not quite tired out enough to--"

The whistling and hooting rose to a fever pitch as one guy, seeing that all the forty bimbos were busy, reached up to grab the Magician Girl's butt.

"--sit dYEEEEEK!" The Dark Magician Girl hopped into the air, squealing, and ran to the bar, tugging along the Harlequin Hussy and blushing furiously as Kim Kap Hwan and Ken Masters laughed uproariously.

The Dark Magician Girl sat down on a bar stool, since there were no other free stools, plopped the Harlequin Hussy on her lap.

On the television, the news reporter was screaming and weeping. "THE ALIENS ARE COMING!" he screamed wildly. "THE MARTIANS AND MING THE MERCILESS ARE GATHERED OVER EARTH AND WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE! EVERYONE, SAY YOUR LAST--"

The bartender, without even looking, picked up the remote control and changed the channel to Pokemon.

The Dark Magician Girl sighed in relief. "Thank Darkness!" she said, her arms around her new friend. "No scary guys to bother us over here!"

Right next to her, a half-drunk Oddler lazily turned to notice her.

 

[hybirdx]

Oddler saw that Ken was acting like his old Perverted self. Wonder what Ryu would say and do to Ken if he saw this... Or much worst, his wife! Oddler thought slowly shaking his head. Then he saw that HH and The dark Magician Girl were sitting near him. He didn't say anything since he didn't feel like getting blasted again.

 

[cats]

OOC: Emotionless all I have to say is I'm carrying a towel.

 

[Jacobo_Curious]

Oblivious to the fact that Oddler was watching her, the Dark Magician Girl hugged her voluptuous friend tightly, needing the warmth due to her very scanty outfit.

"Two beers!" cried the Dark Magician Girl, her breasts pressing into the Harlequin Hussy's back as the occupant of the next seat stared, slack-jawed. The bartender, his nose bleeding, swallowed and nodded, plopping down two frosty mugs of beer.

"Cheers!" cried the Dark Magician Girl, and they both drank after clinking their glasses together, spilling cold beer all over themselves. This was very interesting to many of the occupants in the bar. The bimbos, seeing that it looked like fun, decided to run and get beer for themselves, and began to pour it on themselves as well -- though they did it on purpose.

The television had changed back to the news, and the reporter was continuing to rant, but nobody cared. Who would?


OOC
If that's so, can I borrow your towel now? ^_^

 

[Veryknowing]

Dicky (Robin) was really beginning to enjoy himself when Barbara Gordon came back into the room dressed as Catwoman (so there's two of them in town....Big Deal! It can be explained later).

When she came in, purring, and rubbing herself against him, he began to very excited. Soon, he thought, it would be Whoopie-Time!

That's when the Martian Flying-Saucer suddenly arrived outside the window, shot a huge robotic grabber-arm at him, and took him inside the flying-saucer and flew away into the sky again.

Leaving Barbara Gordon very annoyed!

 

[Emotionless]

ooc: hahaha a towel is the single most important peice of equipment you'll ever have. You should always cary one

 

[Lovelynice]

Jack Slater had just driven through his tenth fruitstand in the past fifteen minutes when he decided he'd had enough. He stopped the cadillac in the middle of the sidewalk, jumped out over the door, and took off his smashed-fruit covered black leather jacket.

His daughter arrived in a huge monster-truck driving over the other cars stuck in the traffic jam, and parked nearby. She came running over and handed him a clean jacket.

"Here you are, daddy!", she said, giving him a kiss on the cheek as well, "See ya! I'm going shopping".

"Yeah...see ya around", Slater replied, watching as she got back into the monster0truck and drove away.

After putting on the jacket and wiping his hair, Jack was now clean again.

He looked up at the giant 50ft tall gorilla that was starting to climb the Billikins Building.

Now why was that so familiar?, Jack wondered....