Kim's poly/kink thread reinvented ...

[KimGordon67]

Lol, except of course you *did* respond to his attentions appropriately.

Lol. Quite.

 

[MrRetro]

Dating site exchange of the week:
Him: 'You don't have your weight listed - is that a touchy subject?'
*His profile literally says 'size doesn't matter', and mine clearly says I haven't listed my weight because I actually have no idea how much I weigh.*
Me: 'It's not a touchy subject for me, but it's obviously an issue for you, so I suggest you keep looking.'
Him: 'Are you a fat chick?'
Me: 'Is there some bit of 'keep looking' that you're struggling with? Or do you get some sort of kick from insulting strangers?'
Him: 'Never mind - you're not what I'm looking for.'
Me: "Yeah - that feeling is pretty mutual.'
Him: 'I'm guessing your [sic] a fat lonely guy.'
Me: 'I'm guessing you're a dick.'

... yes, I probably shouldn't have degenerated into that, but honestly, some guys! Somewhere in there he also called me 'desperate'.

Wow.. If someone can be this disrespectful during messaging, imagine how they could potentially be in real person..! I think you were quite restrained with your vocabulary..!

 

[KimGordon67]

Wow.. If someone can be this disrespectful during messaging, imagine how they could potentially be in real person..! I think you were quite restrained with your vocabulary..!

Those ones just make me laugh really - they're so quick to insult, but then when you bite back, they get all wounded and sad. I know I shouldn't engage, but sometimes I can't stop myself. Tell me I was a sad lonely guy was the final bit of irony.

 

[MrRetro]

Those ones just make me laugh really - they're so quick to insult, but then when you bite back, they get all wounded and sad. I know I shouldn't engage, but sometimes I can't stop myself. Tell me I was a sad lonely guy was the final bit of irony.

Who can blame you for engaging though..? You should have played him along a little, then kick him where it hurts with some words that describe his sad unfortunate and lacking reality..! No wonder he feels that ‘size doesn’t matter’..!

It goes without saying, you’re worth so much more than this..!

 

[AnnieLit]

Dating site exchange of the week:
Him: 'You don't have your weight listed - is that a touchy subject?'
*His profile literally says 'size doesn't matter', and mine clearly says I haven't listed my weight because I actually have no idea how much I weigh.*
Me: 'It's not a touchy subject for me, but it's obviously an issue for you, so I suggest you keep looking.'
Him: 'Are you a fat chick?'
Me: 'Is there some bit of 'keep looking' that you're struggling with? Or do you get some sort of kick from insulting strangers?'
Him: 'Never mind - you're not what I'm looking for.'
Me: "Yeah - that feeling is pretty mutual.'
Him: 'I'm guessing your [sic] a fat lonely guy.'
Me: 'I'm guessing you're a dick.'

... yes, I probably shouldn't have degenerated into that, but honestly, some guys! Somewhere in there he also called me 'desperate'.

He-he, sounds very familiar. Do they make these guys at the same factory? Literally the different end of the world and exactly the same dicks all over the dating scene.

 

[KimGordon67]

He-he, sounds very familiar. Do they make these guys at the same factory? Literally the different end of the world and exactly the same dicks all over the dating scene.

One of the more depressing things is that they're almost always the guys around our age. What happened to our generation?

 

[AngelicaS1780]

Dating site exchange of the week:
Him: 'You don't have your weight listed - is that a touchy subject?'
*His profile literally says 'size doesn't matter', and mine clearly says I haven't listed my weight because I actually have no idea how much I weigh.*
Me: 'It's not a touchy subject for me, but it's obviously an issue for you, so I suggest you keep looking.'
Him: 'Are you a fat chick?'
Me: 'Is there some bit of 'keep looking' that you're struggling with? Or do you get some sort of kick from insulting strangers?'
Him: 'Never mind - you're not what I'm looking for.'
Me: "Yeah - that feeling is pretty mutual.'
Him: 'I'm guessing your [sic] a fat lonely guy.'
Me: 'I'm guessing you're a dick.'

... yes, I probably shouldn't have degenerated into that, but honestly, some guys! Somewhere in there he also called me 'desperate'.

I think you were quite restrained. I probably would have succumbed to the temptation to write something along the lines of “Oh, when you said that size doesn’t matter, you must have been referring to your tiny cock.”

 

[KimGordon67]

I think you were quite restrained. I probably would have succumbed to the temptation to write something along the lines of “Oh, when you said that size doesn’t matter, you must have been referring to your tiny cock.”

Don't think that thought didn't cross my mind ... but that would just invite photographic evidence to 'prove me wrong'.

 

[KimGordon67]

Payday tomorrow ... just spent the last $20 in my wallet on a bunch of lovely flowers from the roadside stall that the local flower grower/florist has. I have no idea what flowers cost in the US, but $20 for a good sized bunch of gorgeous blooms is amazingly good value here. I think she just runs the honesty stall for a bit of extra cash.

Sometimes getting yourself flowers is the best thing to do.

It's also a good indicator that I'm slowly coming out the other side of the crap that has been the last few weeks.

 

[littlebirdjoy]

This thread provided my smile for the morning. Thank you!

Glad you bought yourself some pretty flowers. <3 It is good to do that once in a while. Glad the sun is beginning to shine for you, Kim.

 

[AngelicaS1780]

Don't think that thought didn't cross my mind ... but that would just invite photographic evidence to 'prove me wrong'.

You are likely correct on that.

Glad that you got yourself some beautiful flowers and that you are feeling better.
I only found this thread recently, but really enjoy your writing.

 

[KimGordon67]

Another interesting dating site trope - 'passing the test'.
My profile has a preferred age range of 45-60, and I specifically say 'a young 60'. This morning I got a message from a 60 year old guy listing various things about himself, and then said "So what is the definition of young at 60 in your mind and if i have to ask have i failed.?"
I've struck this numerous times in online encounters - the idea that if people just present themselves in the 'right' way, they'll 'pass' whatever 'test' is entailed to lead to a hook up. It's kind of a similar mindset to going into job interviews. I find this sort of weird in both situations - surely it's better to just be yourself, and if the yourself that you are is compatible with the yourself the other person is being, you'll get on. But if you lie/embellish/whatever to your person-of-interest (or your prospective employer), what then? Do you just maintain the lie forever, which seems like really hard work, and also counter-productive, because you end up in a relationship with someone you're not really that compatible with. Who wants that? (I know the analogy fell over here, because in the job context you earn money, which most people do want.)
People are strange.

 

[cascadiabound]

I think you are brave to be trying on line dating. It seems so daunting to me. So many ways to go wrong.

Keep buying yourself flowers Kim. you deserve them!

 

[KimGordon67]

I think you are brave to be trying on line dating. It seems so daunting to me. So many ways to go wrong.

Keep buying yourself flowers Kim. you deserve them!

I honestly can't see how else I'd meet someone - I mean, it might happen the old-fashioned way, but my everyday life is pretty small and insular. Also, it's kind of fun ... like job interviews, I just approach dates as a bit of an experiment to see if we're the right fit for each other. People are kind of interesting too ... even the guy who worked in 'apparel' and had bought the house he owned because it was equi-distant between his work and his golf club was sort of interesting, because I just never meet people like that usually. (Obviously there's a good reason for that, and I'm not keen to repeat that particular experiment.)

 

[cascadiabound]

I honestly can't see how else I'd meet someone - I mean, it might happen the old-fashioned way, but my everyday life is pretty small and insular. Also, it's kind of fun ... like job interviews, I just approach dates as a bit of an experiment to see if we're the right fit for each other. People are kind of interesting too ... even the guy who worked in 'apparel' and had bought the house he owned because it was equi-distant between his work and his golf club was sort of interesting, because I just never meet people like that usually. (Obviously there's a good reason for that, and I'm not keen to repeat that particular experiment.)

You totally have the right attitude.
I'll be your wing woman any time.

 

[Dreamliner]

Hi Kim

2020 will get better!

I cannot relate to what you are experiencing, somewhat foreign to me, especially the "passing a test" comment. What is that about? surely it is two people meeting and if there is a spark, an interest in who the person is, then you go form there; a test, what is this a University 101 course?

Enjoy the flowers, we should be getting blooms for a good while yet with the recent rain.

 

[KimGordon67]

Hi Kim

2020 will get better!

I cannot relate to what you are experiencing, somewhat foreign to me, especially the "passing a test" comment. What is that about? surely it is two people meeting and if there is a spark, an interest in who the person is, then you go form there; a test, what is this a University 101 course?

Enjoy the flowers, we should be getting blooms for a good while yet with the recent rain.

It is weird ... I don't get it with jobs either. If you essentially lie in a job interview to 'pass', surely they're discover that you can't actually do the job eventually? I tend to approach job interviews like more a chat to see if we click, and think it's the job of the interviewer to decide if I'm the right person for the job, rather than my job to make myself appear to be the right person ... so more like a date. lol.

 

[KimGordon67]

So ... in a somewhat unexpected turn of events, I seem to have ended up chatting with a couple of Tinder. This has happened before, at various points in the last few years, but it's quickly become apparent that whoever they are (and as lovely as they usually are), they aren't 'my sort of people'. But these two seem like they ARE - we had a relatively detailed discussion about Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds and various local bands that was enough to indicate that we have some pretty significant crossovers in relation to things that matter to me.
So now I'm mulling over what I think about this ... do I go to the next step of meeting up with them?

 

[AnnieLit]

So ... in a somewhat unexpected turn of events, I seem to have ended up chatting with a couple of Tinder. This has happened before, at various points in the last few years, but it's quickly become apparent that whoever they are (and as lovely as they usually are), they aren't 'my sort of people'. But these two seem like they ARE - we had a relatively detailed discussion about Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds and various local bands that was enough to indicate that we have some pretty significant crossovers in relation to things that matter to me.
So now I'm mulling over what I think about this ... do I go to the next step of meeting up with them?

Well, them being " your people" is good, but where do they see you fitting in? They want to co-dominate you? Two subs for one Dom? She wants to just sit and watch as he plays with you? Something else? I would think that not all possible scenarios are OK with you, so it would be nice to know some details of what they are looking for beforehand, because FMF or MFF might look very different to different people.

 

[KimGordon67]

Well, them being " your people" is good, but where do they see you fitting in? They want to co-dominate you? Two subs for one Dom? She wants to just sit and watch as he plays with you? Something else? I would think that not all possible scenarios are OK with you, so it would be nice to know some details of what they are looking for beforehand, because FMF or MFF might look very different to different people.

Yeah, we haven't really gotten down to the nitty gritty of things ... this seems to be their first foray into the process of introducing another person, and they've expressed a desire for it to be more than just a one-off thing. They seem very genuine, and a very endearing combination of excited and nervous. But I will ask them about this and report back.

 

[AnnieLit]

Yeah, we haven't really gotten down to the nitty gritty of things ... this seems to be their first foray into the process of introducing another person, and they've expressed a desire for it to be more than just a one-off thing. They seem very genuine, and a very endearing combination of excited and nervous. But I will ask them about this and report back.

Not that I have much experience with this, but I think that if this is their first time and they did not talk to you about any specifics, there is a good chance that they did not talk about them between themselves either. One of them suggested it, the other one agreed, and off they went to Tinder without figuring out what exactly does each of them wants from this experience... So, teacher Kim to the rescue

 

[KimGordon67]

Not that I have much experience with this, but I think that if this is their first time and they did not talk to you about any specifics, there is a good chance that they did not talk about them between themselves either. One of them suggested it, the other one agreed, and off they went to Tinder without figuring out what exactly does each of them wants from this experience... So, teacher Kim to the rescue

"We don't have a grand plan or too much predetermined.

What do you think you would like?"



I think I'll just meet them - the online communication doesn't seem to be eliciting much in the way of useful insights.

 

[AnnieLit]

"We don't have a grand plan or too much predetermined.

What do you think you would like?"



I think I'll just meet them - the online communication doesn't seem to be eliciting much in the way of useful insights.

This is way too funny! Can I be fly on the wall during that conversation?

I was driving to pick up a kid from school and the whole way I was laughing going through possible answers to the question of what you might be looking for. It really can be anything from being a Domme very much into hard S/m to being a sub into heavy humiliation. And, of course, everything in between. But I don't think they realise this as nobody is THAT flexible.

Good luck with them!

 

[KimGordon67]

This is way too funny! Can I be fly on the wall during that conversation?

I was driving to pick up a kid from school and the whole way I was laughing going through possible answers to the question of what you might be looking for. It really can be anything from being a Domme very much into hard S/m to being a sub into heavy humiliation. And, of course, everything in between. But I don't think they realise this as nobody is THAT flexible.

Good luck with them!

I think they just want a nice person to have a relationship with who might be a bit submissive. That's the vibe I'm getting.

 

[AnnieLit]

I think they just want a nice person to have a relationship with who might be a bit submissive. That's the vibe I'm getting.

I am sure you are right, it is just me having fun with all the possible variations.