SunnyDays1
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Lit🌎World ©️ sunny 🌞 days 1 thread her thread
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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In a hurry to get to a special dinner party, the guest speaker arrives and sat down, only to realize he'd forgotten his false teeth.
He explained his dilemma to the man sitting next to him.
The man said, "No problem," reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of false teeth. "Try these,"he said.
"Too loose," the speaker said.
The man pulled out another pair.
"Too tight," the speaker told him.
"I have one more pair."
The speaker tried them and they fit perfectly.
With that, he ate his meal and gave his speech. When the dinner was over, he went to thank the man who'd helped him.
"Where's your office?" he inquired. "I'm looking for a good dentist."
The man replied: "I'm not a dentist. I'm an undertaker."
He explained his dilemma to the man sitting next to him.
The man said, "No problem," reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of false teeth. "Try these,"he said.
"Too loose," the speaker said.
The man pulled out another pair.
"Too tight," the speaker told him.
"I have one more pair."
The speaker tried them and they fit perfectly.
With that, he ate his meal and gave his speech. When the dinner was over, he went to thank the man who'd helped him.
"Where's your office?" he inquired. "I'm looking for a good dentist."
The man replied: "I'm not a dentist. I'm an undertaker."
SunnyDays1
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A fat guy decides to lose some weight.
He heard that a company is running a special weight-loss program. Curious, he decided to sign up for a session.
He is taken to a basketball court. Standing in the middle of the court is a naked woman with a sign around her neck.
"If you catch me, you can fuck me in the ass."
The fat guy starts to chase the woman around the court. Unfortunately for him, the woman is too athletic and he cannot catch up to her. After an exhausting hour, he finally gives up. He heads home and discovers that he has lost 5 pounds.
The next day, the fat guy decides to try again. This time, instead of one woman in the basketball court, it is 2 naked women. They both have to same sign around their necks.
"if you catch us, you can fuck us in the ass."
The fat guy again chases them around for 1 hour without success. At least he has lost another 5 pounds of weight.
Seeing how effective the sessions are, the fat guy decides to book a premium session.
The next day, he is taken to the basketball court again. This time, there are no women. Instead, there are 10 naked men with signs around their necks.
"If we catch you, we get to fuck you in the ass."
He heard that a company is running a special weight-loss program. Curious, he decided to sign up for a session.
He is taken to a basketball court. Standing in the middle of the court is a naked woman with a sign around her neck.
"If you catch me, you can fuck me in the ass."
The fat guy starts to chase the woman around the court. Unfortunately for him, the woman is too athletic and he cannot catch up to her. After an exhausting hour, he finally gives up. He heads home and discovers that he has lost 5 pounds.
The next day, the fat guy decides to try again. This time, instead of one woman in the basketball court, it is 2 naked women. They both have to same sign around their necks.
"if you catch us, you can fuck us in the ass."
The fat guy again chases them around for 1 hour without success. At least he has lost another 5 pounds of weight.
Seeing how effective the sessions are, the fat guy decides to book a premium session.
The next day, he is taken to the basketball court again. This time, there are no women. Instead, there are 10 naked men with signs around their necks.
"If we catch you, we get to fuck you in the ass."
SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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Did you hear about the undercover cop who uncovered a glory hole in a public toilet?
Turns out he received an anonymous tip.
Turns out he received an anonymous tip.
SunnyDays1
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A friend told Tom about a secret method to extending the penis
He told Tom the trick is to masturbate daily for 30 minutes, 30 days straight using grease for lube.
After the 30 days, Tom's dick did not only not grow, it shrank 2 inches. He was livid and so he went back and asked him what the problem was.
"You did it for 30 minutes?" he asked.
"Yes"
"You did it for 30 days straight?"
"Yes 30 days"
"Did you use grease though?"
"Yeah I used Crisco."
"Well no wonder you idiot, that's shortening!"
He told Tom the trick is to masturbate daily for 30 minutes, 30 days straight using grease for lube.
After the 30 days, Tom's dick did not only not grow, it shrank 2 inches. He was livid and so he went back and asked him what the problem was.
"You did it for 30 minutes?" he asked.
"Yes"
"You did it for 30 days straight?"
"Yes 30 days"
"Did you use grease though?"
"Yeah I used Crisco."
"Well no wonder you idiot, that's shortening!"
SunnyDays1
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Three married women are having a "girls only" night out.
They are enjoying a lovely evening talking about their lives as they usually do every week when they meet up, one of them is particularly excited and fails to hide her excitement.
So one of the girls asks her: "So, are you gonna tell us what happened? You are clearly failing to hide your excitement this evening".
"Ok, I'll tell you girls" The woman replies "I had the best sex in my life yesterday, I followed a friend's advice and my husband went on all night long with me, we basically made some fireworks."
The other two women then, surprised by her revelation start asking questions on what did she do, until she gives up and tells them:
"Ok, the secret is this, Mark was having a shower, I waited for him to be finished, I touched his balls and whispered him: 'those balls seems hot', then he basically lifted me from the ground and brought me to bed."
"This seems so easy girl!" One of her friends yells out aloud when she finishes, "I'm gonna try it with Paul tomorrow!"
Fast forward to the next week the three women meet again and now even the second girl is barely containing her excitement to tell the other two what happened.
"You were right!" She tells the other two as soon as they meet up. "I waited for Paul to be out of the shower, grabbed his balls, and whispered to him that they were hot... and that's right! He went on and on all night long."
So the third woman, the shyest one, grows curious and tells them. "Ok, might as well try it out."
The next week the three women meet again but the shy one seems very sad and it's very quiet.
The other two timidly ask her: "So... did something happen?" At that point, she starts to cry.
"YES! John and I are now divorcing and all because of you! I did exactly what you did but it didn't end well at all!"
"Wait..... what?" They reply visibly concerned.
"You heard me well!" She yells them in anger. "I waited for him to get out of the shower touched his balls and then said to him 'wait, why aren't your balls hot? Paul and Mark had hot ones!'"
They are enjoying a lovely evening talking about their lives as they usually do every week when they meet up, one of them is particularly excited and fails to hide her excitement.
So one of the girls asks her: "So, are you gonna tell us what happened? You are clearly failing to hide your excitement this evening".
"Ok, I'll tell you girls" The woman replies "I had the best sex in my life yesterday, I followed a friend's advice and my husband went on all night long with me, we basically made some fireworks."
The other two women then, surprised by her revelation start asking questions on what did she do, until she gives up and tells them:
"Ok, the secret is this, Mark was having a shower, I waited for him to be finished, I touched his balls and whispered him: 'those balls seems hot', then he basically lifted me from the ground and brought me to bed."
"This seems so easy girl!" One of her friends yells out aloud when she finishes, "I'm gonna try it with Paul tomorrow!"
Fast forward to the next week the three women meet again and now even the second girl is barely containing her excitement to tell the other two what happened.
"You were right!" She tells the other two as soon as they meet up. "I waited for Paul to be out of the shower, grabbed his balls, and whispered to him that they were hot... and that's right! He went on and on all night long."
So the third woman, the shyest one, grows curious and tells them. "Ok, might as well try it out."
The next week the three women meet again but the shy one seems very sad and it's very quiet.
The other two timidly ask her: "So... did something happen?" At that point, she starts to cry.
"YES! John and I are now divorcing and all because of you! I did exactly what you did but it didn't end well at all!"
"Wait..... what?" They reply visibly concerned.
"You heard me well!" She yells them in anger. "I waited for him to get out of the shower touched his balls and then said to him 'wait, why aren't your balls hot? Paul and Mark had hot ones!'"
SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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One day Johnny's mom walks in on him while he was making out with his girlfriend.
Johnny was embarrassed and didn't want his family to find out he had his first girlfriend.
But his mom smiled and said, "don't worry Johnny I won't tell your father .....this will be our little secret."
The next day Johnny sat down to breakfast with the family when his father noticed a hickey on his neck and said "Son where'd that hickey on your neck come from?"
Johnny answered, "That is me and mom's little secret."
The rest of the breakfast was very quiet.
Johnny was embarrassed and didn't want his family to find out he had his first girlfriend.
But his mom smiled and said, "don't worry Johnny I won't tell your father .....this will be our little secret."
The next day Johnny sat down to breakfast with the family when his father noticed a hickey on his neck and said "Son where'd that hickey on your neck come from?"
Johnny answered, "That is me and mom's little secret."
The rest of the breakfast was very quiet.
SunnyDays1
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A boy asks his dad one day, “Dad, what’s the difference between confident and confidential?”
His dad replies, “Well, you’re my son – I’m confident about that. And your best friend Bobby is also my son – that’s confidential.”
His dad replies, “Well, you’re my son – I’m confident about that. And your best friend Bobby is also my son – that’s confidential.”
SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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SunnyDays1
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A young lady had just visited her doctor and he informed her that she was pregnant..
the young lady had been married for ten years and had wanted a baby very badly. As she sat on the bus, on her way home, she felt that she had to share the good news with someone. The gentleman sitting next to her seemed as good as anyone to share the good news with.
"Sir", she said, "I just received the best news you could ever imagine. I have to share it with someone or I'll bust." She told him the news that the doctor had told her about being pregnant.
The man shared her enthusiasm as he shared his experience. He said he was a farmer and he had trouble with his hens laying eggs. He stated that he went out to the hen house one morning and all of his hens had laid eggs. He was so happy.
he added, "but confidentially, I changed cocks."
The newly pregnant woman responded, "Confidentially, me too!"
the young lady had been married for ten years and had wanted a baby very badly. As she sat on the bus, on her way home, she felt that she had to share the good news with someone. The gentleman sitting next to her seemed as good as anyone to share the good news with.
"Sir", she said, "I just received the best news you could ever imagine. I have to share it with someone or I'll bust." She told him the news that the doctor had told her about being pregnant.
The man shared her enthusiasm as he shared his experience. He said he was a farmer and he had trouble with his hens laying eggs. He stated that he went out to the hen house one morning and all of his hens had laid eggs. He was so happy.
he added, "but confidentially, I changed cocks."
The newly pregnant woman responded, "Confidentially, me too!"
SunnyDays1
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A wife is clearing out her closet...
And she finds loads of clothes to put to the charity shop. The husband walks in and says “just throw them away, there’s no need to put them to the charity shop”
The wife replies “yes there is, there’s starving children in Africa who could need these clothes”
And the husband says “darling if they can fit in your clothes they aren’t starving”
And she finds loads of clothes to put to the charity shop. The husband walks in and says “just throw them away, there’s no need to put them to the charity shop”
The wife replies “yes there is, there’s starving children in Africa who could need these clothes”
And the husband says “darling if they can fit in your clothes they aren’t starving”
SunnyDays1
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