Make innocuous and silly threats

[spawnofdavey]

I'll stick that laundry back in the wash basket.

 

[Jada59]

Just for that, I’m going to iron your shirt!

 

[Maveryk]

I'm gonna rearrange all your kitchen utensils!

 

[AnotherApe]

Sit down or I'll polish your silverware!

 

[EctoJohn]

You dare besmirch me?
I shall besmirch you back so hard you'll never have seen such a smirching!
You'll be smirched worse than you've ever been smirched before!

 

[EctoJohn]

Back off before I smack your air space with a tire!

 

[AnotherApe]

Leave me alone or I'll tie your shoes!

 

[Ramkhadak]

Leave me alone or I'll tie your shoes!

Let me spank your salad bar butt

 

[Jada59]

I’m gonna floss your teeth!

 

[Ramkhadak]

I will change you from Jada59 to Jada19

 

[Jada59]

I’m going to rearrange your fruit bowl!

 

[Ramkhadak]

I will take away your kittens

 

[AnotherApe]

Hush or I'm going to eat the last donut.

 

[Ramkhadak]

I will take away your shoelaces and starch your underpants

 

[Jada59]

I’m going to peel your carrot!

 

[Ramkhadak]

You will be served carrot soup three times a day

 

[Jada59]

I will take away your shoelaces and starch your underpants

Okay , true story. Years ago I woke up to my BF snickering. He had taken the hot pink laces from my black high top Reeboks and tied my toes together as I slept.

I am just not good at putting laces in shoes. I was NOT happy. Took me next to forever to get the laces off my toes. I was late for work and arrived there with loose shoes because I didn’t have time to put the laces in.

 

[Jada59]

Oh yeah? I might just stuff your celery. Then march raisins across it. Ants on a log!

 

[Ramkhadak]

Okay , true story. Years ago I woke up to my BF snickering. He had taken the hot pink laces from my black high top Reeboks and tied my toes together as I slept.

I am just not good at putting laces in shoes. I was NOT happy. Took me next to forever to get the laces off my toes. I was late for work and arrived there with loose shoes because I didn’t have time to put the laces in.

I will teach you how to put on your shoelaces

 

[Jada59]

I will sharpen your pencil. Do you get the point?

 

[Ramkhadak]

I will arrange a nose swap between Pinocchio and you.

 

[Jada59]

I will speak only in poor Spanish for the entire day, leaving you annoyed and confused.

 

[Ramkhadak]

I will recite nursery rhymes for you all day because it is the only music I know.

 

[Jada59]

I will swap the salt and pepper in your shakers.

 

[Ramkhadak]

I will rattle them shakers in an obscene way.