Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[JerseyJade]

I don't get turned on the slightest when I'm holding or sucking on a warm, hard, pulsating cock.

 

[profindis]

I don't get turned on the slightest when I'm holding or sucking on a warm, hard, pulsating cock.

I believe you!

 

[tiny_tits]

I've enjoyed all the alone "me time" I've had recently.

 

[johnnieblue44]

I've enjoyed all the alone "me time" I've had recently.

I have not the slightest interest in worshipping those tiny tits of yours.

 

[Esslemont]

Ladies...get ready for this.

I’m 9 inches. Wide.
Length? Think of a third leg.

It’s not just gonna fuck you...it’s gonna fuck you up.

Please...be patient if I don’t return your messages immediately.
This thing gets in the way of typing.

Thank you.

 

[JerseyJade]

Ladies...get ready for this.

I’m 9 inches. Wide.
Length? Think of a third leg.

It’s not just gonna fuck you...it’s gonna fuck you up.

Please...be patient if I don’t return your messages immediately.
This thing gets in the way of typing.

Thank you.

Lol

 

[JerseyJade]

I'm 22 y.o and still a virgin.

 

[Esslemont]

I'm 22 y.o and still a virgin.

Lol returned.


I have deflowered many 22 year old virgins.

 

[Taegul]

Any time I go out with a woman, I keep small packets of dipping sauces in my pocket so when the time comes I can be a perfect gentleman and offer her a choice in flavor. BBQ, Sweet and Sour, Ranch, Chipotle, Buffalo, or Honey Mustard. FYI, BBQ is the most popular.

 

[mulehead61]

I am the baddest badass ever...

 

[Xerxes82]

I have fucked every Best Actress Oscar winner since 1985.

 

[Deleted member 3041612]

I'm naked and in the middle of an aggressive fucking session.

 

[Mr_Underground]

Self isolation and day drinking are new and really tough on me.

 

[screwher]

I have a thick 10” cock. And fuck a different woman every night!

 

[AlpineFresco]

I love team sports.

 

[Jakevillines]

I don’t enjoy sharing.

 

[viperbob]

I hate pleasing

 

[johnnieblue44]

I’ve been selling toilet paper on EBay recently.

 

[Series 6]

I never check out any of the girls in my college classes

 

[johnnieblue44]

I never check out any of the girls in my college classes

My part-time gig as a gigolo to wealthy young women is taking a hit during these social distancing times.

 

[Taegul]

My part-time gig as a gigolo to wealthy young women is taking a hit during these social distancing times.

My part-time gig as a gigolo to young women with an over-abundance of toilet paper is through the roof now that I accept alternative forms of payment.

 

[PageWriter]

My goal is to ghost everyone I meet.

 

[vidiman]

I have never been on the Literotica website!

 

[stickygirl]

I got expelled from gay-conversion school

 

[vidiman]

Just ran a marathon in under 2 hours !