Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[Tallulah82]

I used to insert my phone into my hoo-haa when e-boning because some online wanker told me that's the proper way to have phone sex.

I miss those good times.

 

[Wand3rlust]

I am most people on here. Except you, obvs - but everyone else? Me.

 

[EctoJohn]

I have slept with 13 different women named Marionette.

 

[Coyote100]

I want to stay in this hospital forever.

 

[ALovelyNudist]

I have great impulse control

 

[EctoJohn]

I haven't slept in 42 days.

 

[F3x0r]

I'm known for my patience and tolerance of idiots

 

[Rj_Gallos]

I am struggling to decide where to fly my Gulfstream IV to, the Denver area for the Mountain coolness or my 41 footer on Lake Michigan.

 

[SusanHoward]

I’m happy spending weekends alone….

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

I am most people on here. Except you, obvs - but everyone else? Me.

I knew it!

 

[EctoJohn]

I have conquered the planet in an alternate universe.

 

[smtst5]

I’m a huge extrovert and love going places where I don’t know anyone.

 

[Sunlover102]

Im with tequila guy above.

 

[AchtungNight]

I’m Batman.

 

[EctoJohn]

I know Mark Hamill.

 

[IrreverendBoob]

I am most people on here. Except you, obvs - but everyone else? Me.

Also, she's lying; she's also me, and she's you. I am her and we are everyone.

 

[Trubbycat]

I hate it when people want to have sex with me.

 

[AllAmericanMale]

I'm not conflicted now that she's gone.

 

[EctoJohn]

Everything for me is coming up roses!

 

[munch2much]

I have so much time on my hands that up to date on everything

 

[EvaLane]

I’m giving up naps for good - seriously!

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

I don't find Eva hot...at all!

 

[Cindy027]

I am the worlds foremost expert on dinosaurs and have discovered the real reason for their extinction. It was the ferns or to be more precise the dried leaves of the ferns that they rolled (what did you think those little hands were for) into cigarettes. So it was lung cancer that wiped them out.

 

[EctoJohn]

I once built a bridge over the river Kwai.

 

[positiveflirt]

I once built a bridge over the river Kwai.

I took it down and rebuilt it over troubled water.