Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[lanceGibs]

At the base camp of Mount Everest with an all blond team who firmly believe that to climb higher you need more cock .

Feeling a bit shagged out already but ready for the adventure

 

[Gamine67]

I invented the upskirt in March 1987 on the escalator at Terminal 2 in Munich.

 

[kentuckymtnman]

I invented the upskirt in March 1987 on the escalator at Terminal 2 in Munich.

I was looking up Gamine’s skirt on that escalator.

 

[vibes]

my right year is still a virgin

It isn't uh ...

My hair is platinum blond

 

[Cwtchseeker]

I’ve got a voice like Darth Vader

 

[crazychemgirl]

I love asparagus and beets … love to roll around in them on the floor naked

 

[jackburns]

I love asparagus and beets … love to roll around in them on the floor naked

Raw beets or pickled beets?

I'm the life of the party.

 

[VoraciousValue]

I am not currently reading about how to talk dirty in Mexican.

 

[Cwtchseeker]

I speak Valyrian, Dothraki and Vulcan…

 

[Trubbycat]

People are drawn to my wit, charm and masculine good looks.

 

[crazychemgirl]

I’m obsessed with all things red … I smother myself in red sauces on a regular basis

 

[imFlyingsolo]

I am a Rockstar

 

[lanceGibs]

My harem is larger than that of an Arab Sheikh

 

[Backagainpart4]

I have a harem

 

[Weirdnessome]

I am a dragon

 

[Bry1313]

I do not beat a joke into the ground beyond all recognition

 

[lanceGibs]

I hate ketchup

 

[Coyote100]

Wolves are afraid of me.

 

[Xerxes82]

I am not thinking about her naked.

 

[Lily13]

I’m flying to Las Vegas tomorrow to get married by Elvis Presley

 

[VoraciousValue]

My cock is so small that I had to have a prosthetic built in order to fuck.

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

I'm not a Donkey.

 

[saintcero]

My perfection is further enhanced by my humbleness.

 

[Anastasia1999]

I’m so sick of hauling my lardy arse onto my bicycle that I’ve traded her in for a Lamborghini

 

[StillRain]

I am not still in love with an ex Litster.