The Bears Den
- Thread starter MaryBears
- Start date
- Status
Palleon
At your service
- Joined
- Aug 27, 2003
- Posts
- 6,480
MaryBears said:Pall hun
glad to hear your having a slow day at work....
Also glad Jordan is doing great....I hate to hear lil one's are sick
I love your AV.....Very sexy and a big turn on....
Thanks hun, it took me awhile to find a girl in boots I wanted to use
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2003
- Posts
- 23,590
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2003
- Posts
- 23,590
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2003
- Posts
- 23,590
Erotic Sign Language...
John's wife was deaf, so in order to communicate with her, he had to use sign language. They soon got quite confused whenever either of them wanted to have sex. They made up a sign of their own for the action, and then the husband explained through signing, this to her:
"When I want to make love, I will touch your left breast."
She nodded in understanding.
"When I do not want to make love, I will touch both of your breasts."
She nodded again.
"When you want to have sex, you pull on my wanker once."
She smiled shyly and nodded.
"But when you don't want to have sex, just pull on my wanker 357 times."
John's wife was deaf, so in order to communicate with her, he had to use sign language. They soon got quite confused whenever either of them wanted to have sex. They made up a sign of their own for the action, and then the husband explained through signing, this to her:
"When I want to make love, I will touch your left breast."
She nodded in understanding.
"When I do not want to make love, I will touch both of your breasts."
She nodded again.
"When you want to have sex, you pull on my wanker once."
She smiled shyly and nodded.
"But when you don't want to have sex, just pull on my wanker 357 times."
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2003
- Posts
- 23,590
Curing a cough...
John was a clerk in a small drugstore but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the item the customer wanted. Bob, the owner, upset with his clerk's incompetence, warned John that the next sale he missed would be his last.
Just then a man came in coughing and he ask John for their best cough syrup. Try as he might John could not find the cough syrup. Remembering Bob's warning he sold the man a box of Ex-Lax and told him to take it all at once. The customer did as John said and then walked outside and leaned against a lamp post.
Bob had seen the whole thing and came over to ask John what had transpired.
"He wanted something for his cough but I couldn't find the cough syrup. I substituted Ex-Lax and told him to take it all at once," John explained.
"Ex-Lax won't cure a cough" Bob shouted angrily.
"Sure it will" John said, pointing at the man leaning on the lamp post. "Look at him. He's afraid to cough."
John was a clerk in a small drugstore but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the item the customer wanted. Bob, the owner, upset with his clerk's incompetence, warned John that the next sale he missed would be his last.
Just then a man came in coughing and he ask John for their best cough syrup. Try as he might John could not find the cough syrup. Remembering Bob's warning he sold the man a box of Ex-Lax and told him to take it all at once. The customer did as John said and then walked outside and leaned against a lamp post.
Bob had seen the whole thing and came over to ask John what had transpired.
"He wanted something for his cough but I couldn't find the cough syrup. I substituted Ex-Lax and told him to take it all at once," John explained.
"Ex-Lax won't cure a cough" Bob shouted angrily.
"Sure it will" John said, pointing at the man leaning on the lamp post. "Look at him. He's afraid to cough."
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2003
- Posts
- 23,590
Female Obsessions...
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.
"You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first somewhat-portly mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."
He turned to the second Mom, wearing an expensive fur coat; "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Mercedes."
He turns to the third Mom, who was somewhat inebriated; "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."
At this point, the fourth mother, who was wearing a skintight leather skirt, gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers. "Come on, Dick, we're leaving."
A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.
"You all have obsessions," he observed. To the first somewhat-portly mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."
He turned to the second Mom, wearing an expensive fur coat; "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Mercedes."
He turns to the third Mom, who was somewhat inebriated; "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."
At this point, the fourth mother, who was wearing a skintight leather skirt, gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers. "Come on, Dick, we're leaving."
MaryBears
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2003
- Posts
- 23,590
A Little Poker...
Little Johnny woke up in the middle of the night and went to the bathroom. On the way back to bed, he passed his parents' room. When he looked in, he noticed the covers bouncing. He called to his dad, "Hey Dad, what are you doing?"
The dad answered, "Playing cards."
Little Johnny asked, "Who's your Partner?"
The dad answered, "Your mom."
A little later, the dad got up and went to the bathroom (naturally). As he passed Little Johnny's room, he noticed the covers bouncing.
He called to his son, "What are you doing?"
Little Johnny answered, "Playing cards."
The dad asked, "Really? Who's your partner?"
Little Johnny answered...
"You don't need a partner if you have a good hand!"
Little Johnny woke up in the middle of the night and went to the bathroom. On the way back to bed, he passed his parents' room. When he looked in, he noticed the covers bouncing. He called to his dad, "Hey Dad, what are you doing?"
The dad answered, "Playing cards."
Little Johnny asked, "Who's your Partner?"
The dad answered, "Your mom."
A little later, the dad got up and went to the bathroom (naturally). As he passed Little Johnny's room, he noticed the covers bouncing.
He called to his son, "What are you doing?"
Little Johnny answered, "Playing cards."
The dad asked, "Really? Who's your partner?"
Little Johnny answered...
"You don't need a partner if you have a good hand!"
catsr2wild
Taking it easy
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2004
- Posts
- 40,268
Palleon said:
One word....dayummmm....
catsr2wild
Taking it easy
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2004
- Posts
- 40,268
Hey everybody I have good news, went to court with my son and he walked away with $50.00 court costs, and of course the points on his ticket, he could have went to jail for 60 days and a $500.00 fine, I feel a little better now.
Thank you everyone for your well wishes....just hope I can work tonight.....
Thank you everyone for your well wishes....just hope I can work tonight.....
catsr2wild
Taking it easy
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2004
- Posts
- 40,268
MaryBears said:
rotflmao!!!!!
catsr2wild
Taking it easy
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2004
- Posts
- 40,268
Palleon said:
Yes it most certainly does...she is doing my favorite thing to do....
catsr2wild
Taking it easy
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2004
- Posts
- 40,268
MaryBears said:
Not gone, I still have another child to deal with tomorrow...but thank you for the hugs and good thoughts and it is still better
Blue Dolphin
Back home again
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2001
- Posts
- 20,658
hey Mary
hey cats
pleased to hear the good news
{{{{cats}}}}
- Status
Similar threads
