The unappreciated limerick

[EmilyMiller]

Emma & Lily’s Halloween

Halloween and the girls both head out
Their costumes have been turned about
Emma’s in white
Lily’s a fright
The third monster they fuck has a snout

 

[Candy_Kane54]

Virginia and Bonnie were lovers
And pretty wild under the covers
They each cried aloud
And felt really proud
For becoming accomplished earth movers!

 

[SimonDoom]

Hickory dickory dock.
Joe's libido has quite run amok.
He'd rather be swimmin'
In beautiful women,
But alas, he's alone with his cock.

 

[Blueskiessmiling]

A woman with beautiful hair
Was blessed with a generous pair
Like a rose with its thorn
Men’s hearts she left torn
Then went on with nary a care.

 

[12oclocktales]

There was a young lady from Dover
Whose passion was such that it drove her
To cry, when you came,
"Oh dear! What a shame!
Well, now we'll just have to start over!"

 

[Bamagan]

There was a young lady from Derry
Whose vag was exceptionally hairy
Some lovers complained
She should keep it constrained
But every coal mine needs its canary

 

[EmilyMiller]

A curious girl wondered how
A hand up her ass would feel now
So she bought herself lube
Squeezed some out from the tube
Her friend’s fist inside was like “wow!”

 

[EmilyMiller]

There was a young lady from Derry
Whose vag was exceptionally hairy
Some lovers complained
She should keep it constrained
But every coal mine needs its canary

Again, I’m totally confused.

Em

 

[Bamagan]

Again, I’m totally confused.

Em

About the last line? Or do you need a map to Derry?
Back in the day, coal miners (and really any kind of miner who went deep underground) would take a canary or other bird with them as a safety precaution. The birds, being smaller, would generally succumb to bad air first, so if they passed out or died, the miners would know they were in deadly peril. A stress test, of sorts.
In the context of the poem, the woman is using her bush to decide whether or not the 'miners' should be allowed in her cave.
But just in case...

 

[EmilyMiller]

I know about mine canaries - did not make that connection with pubic hair - sorry

Em

 

[Bamagan]

I know about mine canaries - did not make that connection with pubic hair - sorry

Em

Apologies if my answer was too pedantic, sarcastic, etc. I didn't know how much backstory you required, and it seemed more practical to give too much than not enough.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Emily gets frightfully confused
At words that Bamagan‘s used
They don’t correspond
When you are blonde
I know you must all be amused

 

[EmilyMiller]

Apologies if my answer was too pedantic, sarcastic, etc. I didn't know how much backstory you required, and it seemed more practical to give too much than not enough.

I don’t know the meaning of enough, hun

Em

 

[Bamagan]

I don’t know the meaning of enough, hun

Em

 

[Bamagan]

Inspired by the positivity thread:

Young Emily was quite a disgrace
With cum splashed all over her face
She'd entered to win
the BJ competition
But her pearl necklace was merely third place

 

[SimonDoom]

By day, of science she's fond,
But at night seeks the sexual beyond.
Her morals do founder
With each sweaty encounter.
That's how it is when you're blonde.

 

[EmilyMiller]

@Bamagan & @SimonDoom - I’m honored - at least I think I am .

Em

 

[EmilyMiller]

For @SimonDoom and @Bamagan

Emily knelt down with grace
And gripped each cock at its base
Then she sucked and she jerked
Her expertise worked
Yielding two loads of cum on her face

 

[Bamagan]

That Emily, she floats like a bee
It's such a sweet sight to see
When she shows off her flower
I just want to devour
All her delightful, dripping hon-ey!

 

[EmilyMiller]

That Emily, she floats like a bee
It's such a sweet sight to see
When she shows off her flower
I just want to devour
All her delightful, dripping hon-ey!

I have a published anthology of my limericks. Maybe I can have a second volume of ones about me

 

[Bamagan]

Umm, that was actually an 'ode' to Emily Blunt.
...Awkward!

 

[EmilyMiller]

A girl from PA once said, “hun,
I’d really just so have to cum.
Go on fuck me a bit
In my asshole or slit
Then please paint my face when I’m done”

Not fond of “slit” in this context, but too hard to get other things to rhyme

 

[EmilyMiller]

Umm, that was actually an 'ode' to Emily Blunt.
...Awkward!

I have never seen that photo before. Now I can’t get it out of my mind.

Em

 

[Bamagan]

A girl from PA once said, “hun,
I’d really just so have to cum.
Go on fuck me a bit
In my asshole or slit
Then please paint my face when I’m done”

Not fond of “slit” in this context, but too hard to get other things to rhyme

You could have had him go for your clit. Or suckle your tit.

 

[Bamagan]

I have never seen that photo before. Now I can’t get it out of my mind.

Em