Unusual Lubes and Household Toys Thread!

[SummerMorning]

Yes, but only if I get to go first...

 

[sheath]

was eating corn on the cob last nite and just started wondering.....anyone ever tried it? what did it feel like?

Never tried it frozen or cold...that would be different. I did try it fresh off the stalk a few times. I recall not liking it all that much...but who knows? Maybe it was just the wrong ear of corn. I could try it again and let you know!

S.

 

[sheath]

Yes, but only if I get to go first...

Friendly competition can be a very inspiring thing.

S.

 

[midwestyankee]

Geez, hasn't anyone read Faukner around here?

Yeesh, the very thought of corn cobs gives me the chills. But.... each to her own, I guess.

 

[sheath]

Geez, hasn't anyone read Faukner around here?

Ummm...who?



S.

 

[Guest]

For BlueSugar...

 

[Guest]

 

[sheath]

I missed the last few posts on this thread and just saw this one....

Perhaps you just weren't using the right kind of "butter"? I have it on good authority that those kernels do the trick. At least it sounded like it to me.

Oh, my. Maybe that was the problem.

And what kind of "butter" would you recommend?

S.

 

[midwestyankee]

Ummm...who?



S.

Damn, I hate making typos.

Faulkner. With an "L" in the name he used to sign the manuscript for Sanctuary.

 

[sheath]

Some really nutty guy with a really big imagination suggested this one to me, so I can't take credit, but I am gonna post it.

To get really creative, what about 'fucking by proxy'?

Imagine...you and your lover are sitting side by side on a couch or sofa or whatever, fully dressed, not touching. You have a couple on the bed, a man and a woman...or whatever floats your boat, you know. You get to direct that couple to do absolutely anything that enters your head, and you watch...living vicariously through directing your very own live, private sex show.

The big question is, how long could you stay fully clothed and not touch?

S.

 

[sheath]

Damn, I hate making typos.

Faulkner. With an "L" in the name he used to sign the manuscript for Sanctuary.

You've said you hate making them...that's why I simply couldn't resist. I'm cruel, I know.

Forgive me?

S.

 

[midwestyankee]

You've said you hate making them...that's why I simply couldn't resist. I'm cruel, I know.

Forgive me?

S.

Sure.

If there's anything I hate more than typos it's a grudge. Well, there's also warm beer and ice in my scotch - but that's another thread altogether.

 

[sheath]

Sure.

If there's anything I hate more than typos it's a grudge. Well, there's also warm beer and ice in my scotch - but that's another thread altogether.

That makes me think of beer and liquor bottles...

S.

 

[midwestyankee]

That makes me think of beer and liquor bottles...

S.

To stretch the meaning of the thread ever so slightly, liquor has always been one of the finest lubricants.

 

[sheath]

To stretch the meaning of the thread ever so slightly, liquor has always been one of the finest lubricants.

It would be interesting to do some field research. You know, to figure out which liquor made the best lubricant.

All in the name of science, you know.

S.

 

[Guest]

 

[midwestyankee]

It would be interesting to do some field research. You know, to figure out which liquor made the best lubricant.

All in the name of science, you know.

S.

I always wanted to be a scientist when I grew up. Maybe this is my chance to make a worthwhile contribution to science.

 

[Guest]

 

[sheath]

Well, to quote from every bad porn story I have ever read... "love butter, churned from the depths of her pulsating velvety vice of womanly charms"

Or, Country Crock works well (although I guess that is margarine, technically speaking).

Now I'm wondering how you know that. Did you test the products in the dairy aisle, just as midwestyankee is tempted to test the items in the liquor store, for the lubrication quality?

S.

 

[Guest]

 

[midwestyankee]

I think it lubricates the lessening of the morals, moreso than the genitals...

You know: "Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker" (come on, lighten up - SOMEONE had to say it...)

Yep, and we're all glad it was you.

 

[Guest]

 

[sheath]

Yep, and we're all glad it was you.

LMAO!



S.

 

[sheath]

One I've been thinking of lately...

Of course, you all know by now of my guitar fetish, don't you?

For a man...playing electric guitar. Especially a slimline model. Depending on the position of the guitar strap, the pickups can rest right over your cock when you press the guitar to your body...then strum it, play it, make it wail...and if you have just the right kind of guitar, it's constant yet varied vibration right where it does the most good.

And if you are playing in front of an audience, all the better! You get to be a sexual exhibitionist and nobody really knows. They just suspect.

And of course, women can sit on the amp while they watch a guy play...and that vibration tends to get things rather...ready for the encore?



S.

 

[midwestyankee]

One I've been thinking of lately...

Of course, you all know by now of my guitar fetish, don't you?

For a man...playing electric guitar. Especially a slimline model. Depending on the position of the guitar strap, the pickups can rest right over your cock when you press the guitar to your body...then strum it, play it, make it wail...and it's constant yet varied vibration right where it does the most good.

And if you are playing in front of an audience, all the better! You get to be a sexual exhibitionist and nobody really knows. They just suspect.



S.

That would sure beat the hell out of playing air guitar.