What kicks you out of a story.

[RainyDayPen]

Fair enough! This all makes sense to me. I do feel bad if I have insulted any lonely readers or writers out there, by the way.

Yes I do try to make sure my more fantastical stories have internal logic. As a reader, though, I can be super forgiving of all kinds of stuff if a story hits right. I am so forgiving in my own kinks, but if I read something say vanilla I am suddenly so critical haha.

 

[TheArsonist]

Thought of another two:

-Characters who are treated like shit by everybody for no reason
-Characters who get everything handed to them for no reason ("I got promoted from checkout clerk to company vice president and my new secretary immediately offered to blow me in my office and my parents gave me a car and my uncle died and left me his apartment with a swimming pool and my school bully attacked me but I karate chopped him and he went to jail")

(And there are some real gems that do both.)

As others are saying, it's not about realism but believability. The second one would be fine (or at least not so actively off-putting) if it was explained as mind control or finding a good luck charm or something.

 

[yowser]

This highlights an interesting idea I need to think about. The opening moments of a writing need to convey to the reader something like "relax, you are in good hands here."

Well captured. I want an author to lead the dance. Lure me into the next room. Doesn't have to be flawless seduction, but I appreciate some care. 'Show me I can trust you.' Attention to grammar and logic are like dressing up, doesn't need to be flashy, but I'd like you to come to the door not in raggy shorts and a torn tee-shirt.

Detail is marvelous if well done, something that tells me that the writer is a perceptive person. 'A shapely clavicle' is far more interesting to me than any breast description that involves measurements of any sort.

Treat me, the reader, with respect, invite my attention, let me know that something good is just around the corner.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Oh, if you insist.

https://gifdb.com/images/thumbnail/kate-upton-unzips-the-layover-wde4hwjrrd2cv1ky.gif

You are a very bad woman, with very good taste in women .

Em

 

[onehitwanda]

You are a very bad woman

I know

with very good taste in women

I know

 

[KachinaDoll]

Guys that can stay hard for four fucks.
Breast descriptions in bra sizes.
A cock penetrating a cervix - do be serious.
Bad grammar - English is a beautiful language, respect it.
Female characters who for some reason say, "Oh gawd," when they orgasm.
High school kids who are all miraculously over 18.

 

[onehitwanda]

A cock penetrating a cervix

https://media.tenor.com/e3zfKPHn3JkAAAAM/cringe-face.gif

 

[EmilyMiller]

Guys that can stay hard for four fucks.

You need to read my Angels & Demons series - I found a loophole

Breast descriptions in bra sizes.

I have FMCs self describe sometimes as they would clearly know this information

A cock penetrating a cervix - do be serious.

Tenuous grip on anatomy, right?

Bad grammar - English is a beautiful language, respect it.

I iz agreementing wiv dis won

Female characters who for some reason say, "Oh gawd," when they orgasm.

Could be worse. Could be Ohhh Myeee Gawd

High school kids who are all miraculously over 18.

At least there is a reason for this one

 

[EmilyMiller]

Oh, if you insist.

https://gifdb.com/images/thumbnail/kate-upton-unzips-the-layover-wde4hwjrrd2cv1ky.gif

Who is she, BTW. Asking for a friend.

Em

 

[MrPixel]

A cock penetrating a cervix - do be serious.

Somebody actually wrote this? Was the guy... did the guy... have a pencil down there? If you're going to write about the mechanics of intercourse in that sort of detail, bone-up on your human physiology, will ya'. (Yes, pun intended.)

Bumping into it, yeah, it happens. Which I understand can be decidedly unpleasant.

 

[HordHolm]

Asking for a friend.

Several friends, actually.

 

[EmilyMiller]

So many folks want intense levels of realism, the realer the better it seems. For some reason I am at odds with that concept. I try to make it not completely laughable, but why would I read fiction about something I could just do with a partner? Or read a written version of something you could easily see in low budget porn? I read to escape real life, including the non-erotic fiction.

I say let there be magical spells or crazy future tech or bizarre alternate worlds or nations where way more people than usual are into my kinks. Where else would I ever get something like that but through the written word?

This reminds me of those people who paint photorealistic art. It's not a concept I enjoy. Just take a photo. It's amazing talent, don't get me wrong, it's precise and technical. But it's like, you are completely ignoring the vastness of the human imagination. Do something with your pen that you can't do in reality.

I’m with you. It’s meant to be porn, not incisive commentary on the human condition.

The issue is when you depart too far from reality. I try to make my occasional Sci-Fi stories at least self-consistent in universe.

If I want an MMC who is a sentient, levitating, telepathic, shape-shifting, horny octopus (and frankly who wouldn’t?) then I need some in-Universe rationale for his existence.

Em

 

[HordHolm]

If I want an MMC who is a sentient, levitating, telepathic, shape-shifting, horny octopus (and frankly who wouldn’t?) then I need some in-Universe rationale for his existence.

Em

I felt sorry for him... it... He/it was horribly kink-shamed (not by you, of course).

 

[EmilyMiller]

Somebody actually wrote this? Was the guy... did the guy... have a pencil down there? If you're going to write about the mechanics of intercourse in that sort of detail, bone-up on your human physiology, will ya'. (Yes, pun intended.)

Bumping into it, yeah, it happens. Which I understand can be decidedly unpleasant.

I’ve had an internal examination which involved scraping a few cells off of mine (nothing nasty found). It hurt like fuck.

I also know someone who had IVF, which involves penetrating the cervix (with a very thin probe), she said the same.

A cock? Do me a favor!

Em

 

[lovecraft68]

Certainly, perfect hot bodies do exist in real life, but it's a fine line between a realistic older hot bod and a straight up Mary Sue. The difference, a good writer to put the hot bod in an immersive believable scene.

In one of my milf stories, the FMC was a personal trainer, figured her career would validate the body
Another. an escort, another career that requires looking good.
Its not hard to come up with things like that, but it seems a lot of author's don't even want to make any effort

Having said that, erotica is all about the Mary Sue both male and female. Or have you not discovered that many of the dad's on lit don't have dad bods they have the bodies of 24 year old athletes.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I felt sorry for him... it... He/it was horribly kink-shamed (not by you, of course).

It all ended well though, if you ever make it through Determination and all the way to the epilogue of Caputpedes .

That’s not exactly a spoiler I guess.

Em

 

[BobbyLaker]

I think it might be that in a genre of fiction where using often repeated story lines is nearly unavoidable, the college student home on summer break having wild sexual adventures is the most common to where it seems like the writer isn't even trying to be more original.

... or Mom sitting on son's lap in the back while hubby drives on a road trip so long that they get to fuck multiple times and, guess what? hubby never suspects a thing
Having said that, I have read a couple of these to the end.

 

[alohadave]

Somebody actually wrote this? Was the guy... did the guy... have a pencil down there? If you're going to write about the mechanics of intercourse in that sort of detail, bone-up on your human physiology, will ya'. (Yes, pun intended.)

Bumping into it, yeah, it happens. Which I understand can be decidedly unpleasant.

I've read multiple stories where this happens. Usually with a monster-size cock.

 

[AchtungNight]

The issue is when you depart too far from reality. I try to make my occasional Sci-Fi stories at least self-consistent in universe.

If I want an MMC who is a sentient, levitating, telepathic, shape-shifting, horny octopus (and frankly who wouldn’t?) then I need some in-Universe rationale for his existence.

I ever put anything like that in my stories, I’ll make the character some distant relation of the alleged Faerie Alien Hybrid whom he doesn’t talk about much. Perhaps his father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I ever put anything like that in my stories, I’ll make the character some distant relation of the alleged Faerie Alien Hybrid whom he doesn’t talk about much. Perhaps his father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate.

See, I went with an understanding and mastery of the most fundamental layer of matter (and pointed out that this didn’t involve tiny vibrating strings).

Em

 

[Bamagan]

See, I went with an understanding and mastery of the most fundamental layer of matter (and pointed out that this didn’t involve tiny vibrating strings).

Em

Ah, string theory. The anal beads of reality.

 

[nylonpunkie]

It seems, from reading this thread, that readers can be put off by just about anything and so it's probably not worth worrying about?

 

[joy_of_cooking]

It seems, from reading this thread, that readers can be put off by just about anything

Yes

so it's probably not worth worrying about?

No.

The tails are long but the frequent items are very frequent.

 

[ChassonKnight]

It seems, from reading this thread, that readers can be put off by just about anything and so it's probably not worth worrying about?

I certainly think if you're writing you've got to write for yourself mostly. But there are some trends that people might keep in mind while writing.

 

[Smuttyandfun]

I've mentioned before that one of my pet peeves is when a story is littered with exclamation marks !!!!!!! I find it jarring.

The other thing is the word 'cock', used repeatedly. That'll get me to click off faster than anything.