Are we headed toward a Dom shortage?
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A Desert Rose
Simply Charming Elsewhere
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I found something really intersting in this thread. And I've thought about it a lot over the last couple of days.
Several of you have mentioned that you get approached by subs in PM and it seems you are approached quite boldly and often.
In truth, I have kinda done this one time and I was spurned. Since then, I have never approached a Dom, in that way. (And since then, that particular Dom has become a valued friend - I bet he knows who he is, too, if he reads this.) But I guess I'm just old-fashioned in believing that it's not my place to approach a man, period, in the hope of starting a relationship with him. He should approach me.
Are these subs who do the pm-ing, young and looking for someone to mentor them?
Several of you have mentioned that you get approached by subs in PM and it seems you are approached quite boldly and often.
In truth, I have kinda done this one time and I was spurned. Since then, I have never approached a Dom, in that way. (And since then, that particular Dom has become a valued friend - I bet he knows who he is, too, if he reads this.) But I guess I'm just old-fashioned in believing that it's not my place to approach a man, period, in the hope of starting a relationship with him. He should approach me.
Are these subs who do the pm-ing, young and looking for someone to mentor them?
For the
most part they are young and DO want someone to mentor them.
I encourage them to check out the library here at Lit and for then rarely do I hear from them. They think they "know" but they they don't.
But when I do . . . they ask interesting questions.
most part they are young and DO want someone to mentor them.
I encourage them to check out the library here at Lit and for then rarely do I hear from them. They think they "know" but they they don't.
But when I do . . . they ask interesting questions.
kitty4ever
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Well, ADR, I've not approached a Dom in such a manner, either online or in real. I'm not sure that I could. As for a mentor role? I have an older Dom friend who is, in many ways, a mentor to me. But, before that, we're became friends.
Trust is very important. I can't submit without trust. Maybe I'm too old, or just too cynical to blindly trust someone that I barely know. At one time, I could and did trust that easily. I don't anymore.
I have approached Doms with questions, but never an offer of service. Sometimes, that can grow into more of a friendship and trust, including or not BDSM, but it's not mandatory. Instead, I would view that as an added benefit.
Trust is very important. I can't submit without trust. Maybe I'm too old, or just too cynical to blindly trust someone that I barely know. At one time, I could and did trust that easily. I don't anymore.
I have approached Doms with questions, but never an offer of service. Sometimes, that can grow into more of a friendship and trust, including or not BDSM, but it's not mandatory. Instead, I would view that as an added benefit.
A Desert Rose
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kitty4ever said:
We must have graduated from the same school. ;-D
Like you, I have asked questions of Dom/mes and I will PM with a thank you to ANYONE whose post hits home for me. I'm very uncomfortable making the first move with someone and if they don't make the second, then I know to keep on walking.
But like you, to PM someone and offer service to them... it's not gonna happen in this subbie's lifetime. LOL
AngelicAssassin
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On a tangent
The above had overrun a new born version of the below ...
bumping the newborn off it's feet in the process.
i watched a nature documentary on cheetahs a few weeks ago ... cycle of life for the cheetah and springbok.A Desert Rose said:
The above had overrun a new born version of the below ...
bumping the newborn off it's feet in the process.
- Everything else scattered to the four winds while the cheetah put on the brakes.
- Newborn gets confused and runs to the cheetah.
- Cheetah gets totally confused
- Newborn tries to nurse.
- Cheetah freaks and ambles away.
Kajira Callista
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lol i dont PM anyone who doesnt PM me first, once they do i feel ok about PMing them...im shy that way. Maybe i should attempt a new approach?A Desert Rose said:
A Desert Rose
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Re: Re: On a tangent
So is he saying that subs scare Dom/mes off?
Or what.......?
he is soooo fucking confusing to me sometimes. LOL
Netzach said:
So is he saying that subs scare Dom/mes off?
Or what.......?
he is soooo fucking confusing to me sometimes. LOL
AngelicAssassin
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Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
Even the most predictable things sometimes come with a twist.
No darlin'.A Desert Rose said:
Even the most predictable things sometimes come with a twist.
A Desert Rose
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Re: Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
okay... and still you're point is... what? LOL I guess I'm just really dense.
AngelicAssassin said:
okay... and still you're point is... what? LOL I guess I'm just really dense.
bridgeburner
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Re: On a tangent
Oh my gawd, that's funny. Big bewildered blinky brown eyes, scalded cat doing a doubletime backpeddal then stalking off all wounded dignity while the lambchop bleats piteously.
btw, the lines of that cheetah are simply mouthwatering.
-B
AngelicAssassin said:i watched a nature documentary on cheetahs a few weeks ago ... cycle of life for the cheetah and springbok.
The above had overrun a new born version of the below ...
bumping the newborn off it's feet in the process.Right up to the point newborn started to nurse, i'm thinking Darwin's Law. Afterwards, i'm laughing. They should have named the newborn "Expect no mercy" in the native tongue of Namibia.
- Everything else scattered to the four winds while the cheetah put on the brakes.
- Newborn gets confused and runs to the cheetah.
- Cheetah gets totally confused
- Newborn tries to nurse.
- Cheetah freaks and ambles away.
Oh my gawd, that's funny. Big bewildered blinky brown eyes, scalded cat doing a doubletime backpeddal then stalking off all wounded dignity while the lambchop bleats piteously.
btw, the lines of that cheetah are simply mouthwatering.
-B
kitty4ever
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
<giggles> I just said to someone trying to explain a computer thingy to me "Call me dense, but I don't get it."
A Desert Rose said:
<giggles> I just said to someone trying to explain a computer thingy to me "Call me dense, but I don't get it."
A Desert Rose
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ahhh hell AA, just bring your wild animals to the circus, ok?
kitty4ever
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Kajira Callista said:
Maybe we can all pass notes like the high school girls have about Marquis?
AngelicAssassin
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
Let me ask a question, and i'll preface with this is an oldie.
If you had a choice between riding a rollercoaster and a merry-go-round, which would you choose? Hell, that might even be a good allegorical thread topic.
People aren't stable chemical compounds. You don't mix people like HCl and NaOH to get salt water every time, and i'm so glad you don't. What would be the reason for living if you did?A Desert Rose said:
Let me ask a question, and i'll preface with this is an oldie.
If you had a choice between riding a rollercoaster and a merry-go-round, which would you choose? Hell, that might even be a good allegorical thread topic.
bridgeburner
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I'm hanging out at the Freak Show and the Haunted House.
-B
A Desert Rose
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Re: Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
LMAO... you soooo funny!
Netzach said:
LMAO... you soooo funny!
A Desert Rose
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
Good thread idea!!! I'd run with it... but that's just my suggestion.
AngelicAssassin said:
Good thread idea!!! I'd run with it... but that's just my suggestion.
PrettyKitty427
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bridgeburner said:
hmmm sounds like a great idea...i hope i find someone dumb enough to make me money like that some day
PrettyKitty427
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Re: hear hear
send copy of this email please.
Rugor said:
send copy of this email please.
PrettyKitty427
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
depends...does the rollercoaster have loops?
AngelicAssassin said:
depends...does the rollercoaster have loops?
FungiUg
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A Desert Rose said:
I generally get two types. One is, as you say, the "young and looking for a mentor" type. The other is just someone being chatty. I don't think I have had anyone PM me specifically interested in becoming my submissive though.
I guess I'm special though, 'cause from memory (admittedly what little there is of it), both KC and ADR PM'd me before I PM'd them... do I get a medal now?
AngelicAssassin
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: On a tangent
Enough to make the owner of a cast iron stomach hurl.PrettyKitty427 said:
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