Critics Awards - The rest of us

[Guest]

the marvel of it

The rose for overcoming my bias against arachnids goest to Master_Vassago for Spiderman Meets J. Jameson .

MV- I'm thinking that you need to patent the use of webbing for a sex enhancer. Nicely done!

b

 

[MathGirl]

Misc.

]The First TimeI'm so ashamed of that.

As well you should be, KD. I'd hate to have a list of my titles get out. Shudder.

Hey, Svenska. Cool new avathingie. I thought maybe Valentine's Day was just in the USA.

Hi, BKeeney. Welcome back. Can you come up with a nice award for Master V? Something in paisley, plaid, polka dots, and horizontal stripes, perhaps. Muted, tasteful colors, of course.

Ps... There's a thread on here called "Where is D Fiant" that makes me wonder if someone is using my computer when I'm not looking.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Swedes didn't celebrate Valentine's Day until the 1960'ies, but nowadays, we just adopt any American tradition that can make us spend money on silly cards and presents and decorations. Valentine, Halloween... Now, just exaclty what is this Kwanzaa I've been hearing about? I know it's a holiday, but is it related to Kazaa at all? Coz that I know what it is...

D fiant? D fiant? Doesn't ring a bell...

 

[Guest]

the envelope please....

The rose for a story that reinforced my belief that substitute teaching is not my calling goes to dr_mabeuse for Sex Ed .

dr_m- The last time I substitute taught Chemistry and Physics at our local high school I intercepted a note saying "At least this one has nice tits." I must have gotten out just in time.

b

 

[sirhugs]

Re: the envelope please....

The rose for a story that reinforced my belief that substitute teaching is not my calling goes to dr_mabeuse for Sex Ed .

dr_m- The last time I substitute taught Chemistry and Physics at our local high school I intercepted a note saying "At least this one has nice tits." I must have gotten out just in time.

b

at least we know they had good eyesight

 

[Guest]

close, but no cigar

I'd like to beg an award for worst title:

The First Time.

I'm so ashamed of that.

KD-

You must remember that I am unequivocally positive in my awards. So, while I may or may not agree with your assessment, that is not an award I may bestow.

Rather, the rose for a story that far and away exceeded the expectations that its title raised goes to karmadog for First Time .

b

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: the envelope please....

at least we know they had good eyesight

sirhugs,

Then I guess they wouldn't have been students in dr_m's story; by his description they should all be blind!

b

 

[SexyChele]

Just read through this thread after I've seen it being bumped to the top. Have to thank all for a little chuckle on an otherwise rainy day! Keep the humor going - this thread is much better than the one it took its name from!

 

[sirhugs]

Re: Re: Re: the envelope please....

sirhugs,

Then I guess they wouldn't have been students in dr_m's story; by his description they should all be blind!

b

oh, the LIES our mothers told us.

 

[Guest]

but the truths also...

The rose for the story that convinced me that mom was right when she said to never accept a gift from a stranger goes to SexyChele for Cassie's Strange Adventure .

SC- I hate it when she's right!

b

 

[Octavian]

The worst title

karmadog

'The First Time' is not such a bad title.

If you want a bad title, how about 'I Gave Up Sex in Order to Spend More Time Studying the Alluvial Plains of Outer Mongolia'

Now that's what I'd call a bad title.

Octavian
Bearer of the Silver Rose

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Re: The worst title

karmadog

'The First Time' is not such a bad title.

If you want a bad title, how about 'I Gave Up Sex in Order to Spend More Time Studying the Alluvial Plains of Outer Mongolia'

Now that's what I'd call a bad title.

Octavian
Bearer of the Silver Rose

I don't know... I think "alluvial" sounds kinda... kinky. Not thatr I know what it means, but, still...

 

[SexyChele]

Re: but the truths also...

The rose for the story that convinced me that mom was right when she said to never accept a gift from a stranger goes to SexyChele for Cassie's Strange Adventure .

SC- I hate it when she's right!

b

*Laughing hysterically* OMG! If you have asked which one of my stories was the most mediocre, this is the one I would have chosen! Well, at least I know you are good at what you do!

Whew! I needed that good laugh today!

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: The worst title

I don't know... I think "alluvial" sounds kinda... kinky. Not thatr I know what it means, but, still...

alluvial: pertaining to a flood... so i guess you could interpret Octavian's title to mean that the main character gave up vaginal intercourse to be fully devoted to planting his face where his woman's juices flooded out.

"Her alluvial juices coated his face."

b the multifacted MC

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Or, to be more direct, he stopped fucking her to instead start licking her?

Hmmm... I think I've dated that person...

 

[Octavian]

Oral sex in Outer Mongolia?

Svenskaflicka

It's mostly yaks in Outer Mongolia and I've yet to see one I fancy enough to have oral sex with!

Octavian
Who knows he shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition!

 

[Svenskaflicka]

That's because your oral sex requires getting sucked, not licked.

 

[TheEarl]

I think Bridget was right on the money with the award she gave me. It was to the story which I consider my most mediocre.

Averageness rules!

The Earl

 

[MathGirl]

Re: close, but no cigar

KD-

Rather, the rose for a story that far and away exceeded the expectations that its title raised goes to karmadog for First Time
b

Nicely done, BKeeney. I think you deserve some sort of award for tap dancing around an issue and approaching it from an unexpected direction.

Yay for KarmaDog!

 

[MathGirl]

Thread

Just read through this thread after I've seen it being bumped to the top. Have to thank all for a little chuckle on an otherwise rainy day! Keep the humor going - this thread is much better than the one it took its name from!

When a thread gets started, you never know where it's going to lead. Especially with this bunch.

See what a bunch of weirdos, perverts, eccentrics, and plain old nutcases can do when they put their mind to it?

The term "most mediocre" bothers me. It conveys the image of superiority, and that's what we're trying to avoid here. How about "averagely mediocre" or "run of the mill mediocre" or "only so-so in its mediocrity"

 

[gauchecritic]

I think Bikini has an expert eye for mediocrity (hence my award for the one 'story' which took about 10 minutes to write) and is thoroughly deserving of an award for her Mistress of Ceremoniousness, hence

Gauche

 

[Guest]

disclaimer

*walking across the stage with a broad smile as the network breaks for a commercial*

All roses issued by bridgetkeeney are solely the opinion of bridgetkeeney. They are in no way intended to be taken as the opinion of the Author's Hangout in particular or Literotica in general. They are intended to highlight one random work of every author who posts to this thread and perhaps invoke a smile or two.

While MG emphasizes the mediocrity, I choose to emphasize the individuality. There are glimmers of genius everywhere... some of us just hide it better than others.

b

*not sure whether to blush at gauche's comments*

 

[Guest]

a little slow

Gauche-

Just saw the rose... thank you very much... now I am blushing... and you know how we fair people blush...

b

 

[MathGirl]

Re: disclaimer

[B
While MG emphasizes the mediocrity, I choose to emphasize the individuality. There are glimmers of genius everywhere... some of us just hide it better than others. [/B]

If that's true, I consider myself the Stealth Bomber of Literotica.

 

[Just-Legal]

*giggle*

Well at least it was one of my SS chapters! The rest of my stuff isn't even mediocre, its CRAP!!!

And god damnit, I need to re-write my incest story for Survivor cause its not long enough...

Oh, Sven, guess who gets to go play on the set of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban?

Dibs on being Slytherin in Potions class!!