Incompetently Flirt with the Lister Above You

[SmokingFap]

Do you like skinny dipping? My bathtub is big enough for two.

 

[TheMrBurns]

I just got my test results back. Wanna catch 'em all?

Gonorrhea, I choose you!

 

[Qky75]

She-bangs, she-bangs! Yes, I want you to cut my hair to look like Ricky's in that music video.

Do the William Hung version!!

 

[crazychemgirl]

Is your boner lava chunky or chunk free?

 

[SmokingFap]

I'm having trouble getting health insurance again. Do you know anything about proctology?

 

[TheMrBurns]

Is your boner lava chunky or chunk free?

Well you gotta stay hydrated.

 

[Shenanigans90]

The doctor said I could die if I don’t have sex tonight. Wanna be a lifesaver?

 

[crazychemgirl]

So yeah, I got evicted earlier today … total bummer…

Wanna go back to your place and fuck?

*never leaves

 

[Great_Scot]

So yeah, I got evicted earlier today … total bummer…

Wanna go back to your place and fuck?

*never leaves

I hear you’re looking for a stud. Well, I’ve got the STD and all I need is you.

 

[crazychemgirl]

I want you to explode inside me like a lovebomb

(@ToPleaseHim)

 

[SmokingFap]

I hate it when people beat around the bush. But I wouldn't mind beating around yours.

 

[TomTeacher19]

The doctor said I could die if I don’t have sex tonight. Wanna be a lifesaver?

Sadly I've seen that one actually used effectively in real life.

 

[lavendersilk]

Sadly I've seen that one actually used effectively in real life.

Speaking from experience?

 

[MiaBabe23]

Why don’t we mix your boner lava with my lady garden waters?

 

[TomTeacher19]

Speaking from experience?

No, just a witness

 

[orangecurious]

Water! that is fascinating, it changes volume when it changes state. Amazing.. i mean, as steam it can be condensed, but not as a liquid and then it expands when frozen! Just incredible.

hello?

 

[SmokingFap]

You are so smart and funny! I've had such a great time with you. Do you have a better-looking sister?

 

[Great_Scot]

Anyone else saving these for future use?

 

[SmokingFap]

Anyone else saving these for future use?

No, I'm just trying to get all of these out of my system. I would actually LIKE to date women again.

 

[Great_Scot]

No, I'm just trying to get all of these out of my system. I would actually LIKE to date women again.

Good luck. That ship has sailed for me.

Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koalafications.*

*sorry!

 

[positiveflirt]

Anyone else saving these for future use?

In a few weeks someone is going to hand me a live mic in a room full of people i barely know.

Keep 'em coming!

 

[Anastasia1999]

Good luck. That ship has sailed for me.

Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koalafications.*

*sorry!

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I try walking by again??

 

[crazychemgirl]

I heard you like manky vaginas …

 

[Anastasia1999]

I heard you like manky vaginas …

Ok, you win!!

 

[Great_Scot]

I heard you like manky vaginas …

Wow....