Incompetently Flirt with the Lister Above You

[Taegul]

I must work for the FBI because you're on my Ten Most Wanted list.

 

[Wand3rlust]

Me: oh no, that's fine. I like hairy men. And whether it's facial hair, or back hair. Chest hair. I mean, I suppose I draw the line at long toe hair, but I mean. It's not about that. It's ALL about the person. I didnt know you were called 'hairies', is that like a group thing? In any case, it's fine, live and let live. A bit of something to grab hold of, amirite?

Date: .......... I said I was Aries.

 

[Mrmphilll2]

Chicken McNuggets for the win

 

[Shymidwestgirl]

Chicken McNuggets for the win

Do I get a diet pop and fries with those chicken nuggets?

 

[staylate]

Do I get a diet pop and fries with those chicken nuggets?

[Smiles with unfounded confidence]. I'm going to order you that pop, those fries, and those nuggets to my home and feed them to you like a parent bird feeds its chick.

 

[fakingadulthood]

How did you know about my kink? I get so turned on role playing as a canibalistic farm animal!

 

[Taegul]

You remind me of my ex. That reminds me...I have to check if that restraining order has an expiration date.

 

[Coyote100]

Hey babe, would you l Iike come over to my...wait a sec. Taegul!!! Forget that.

 

[Photog1rl]

Do yoy think you can catch me? Meep, meep.

 

[ImThe3rdWheel]

I must work for the FBI because you're on my Ten Most Wanted list.

Yeah…….Smooooooth

 

[Sallyhansen6914]

On a scale of 1 to 10, you’re a 9 and I’m the 1 you lack.

 

[thetabeta89]

How you doin'?

 

[Mrmphilll2]

Sausage and Egg McMuffin for the win

 

[AlwaysDancing]

Ghandi, right. He was always fasting and that gave him notoriously bad breath and weakened his immune system. But also made him kinda psychic. And walking barefoot everywhere? Dude had some tough scaly feet.

Which makes him

(I hope you’re ready to be aroused)

A super-calloused-fragile-mystic-hexed-by-halitosis!

 

[Wand3rlust]

Mm no no, it's fine. I find really long dad jokes hilarious....

 

[TomTeacher19]

....Chapter Three: Learning to crawl.

Do you need a coffee? You look tired, but you said you wanted to get to know me and we have two hundred and thirty nine more chapters to get through of my life story.

 

[Secretintoelderly]

Reading the comments: So happy with my bodygroomer

 

[Photog1rl]

Are you an older man? I've heard they have higher credit limits know how to take care of their partners.

 

[Secretintoelderly]

Could you define older?

 

[Cwtchseeker]

Hope it’s ok, but took liberty of asking your dad for your hand before our first date, just in case it went well…

 

[Photog1rl]

Could you define older?

Let’s start with nonvirginal.
And yes, I have seen the 40-year-old virgin. so…older.

 

[Secretintoelderly]

Let’s start with nonvirginal.
And yes, I have seen the 40-year-old virgin. so…older.

Lol, 38 and nonvirgin

 

[Photog1rl]

Lol, 38 and nonvirgin

That username and tagline may imply otherwise

 

[Secretintoelderly]

That username and tagline may imply otherwise

Nope, coz i am secretly into…. Not saying you are

 

[Mrtenant]

Wanna know how you get Dick from Richard? Just ask him.

Hello, my name is Richard.