Most women don't climax from penetration alone — and 4 other important facts about female orgasms

[AnnieLit]

Going to have to disagree with the premise that women who don't cum from penetration aren't interested in penetration. The majority of the women I've been with did not cum from penetration, but they loved to fuck! Especially the current partner. However they all knew that my oral skills would push them over the edge multiple times so perhaps the real issue is can their partners give them orgasms at all?

That wasn't exactly what I meant...

He was talking about swingers - that ALL the women that he had met this way were orgasming just from penetration, so his conclusion was that ALL women in general must be able to do so. My point was that women that know that they can't cum this way are much less interested in fucking random partners. Can a woman fuck without an orgasm? Yes. Can she enjoy it? Hell yes! Will she be inclined to seek out this experience if she knows that this is ALL she will get out of it? Much less likely than if she actually could orgasm from penetration.

 

[chad132]

Thank you for your help but I still don't get why the media and most women all say bigger is better and if it is less than 6 inches they won't even do a one-time hookup. MY asking is because I was about 5.5 before prostate surgery which left me with no more erections. The good doctor said he would give me a penile implant so my wife of 38 years and I could still have sex. But what he gave me was a 3.5-inch implant. My wife tried for 2 years but could now not have orgasms. She needed someone larger to have orgasms again.so I started to check out if size matters to women and it seems it is very important that men b no less the 5 inches or women will not sleep with them. Can you see why I am trying to learn what I need to attract another woman? One thing that I do have is that the implant stays hard as I want like hours, so if I have to be bigger I will need to get some help. thank you for listening. I still need sex.

 

[IrisAlthea]

The brain is the most important sexual organ. Exercise it: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319596

It’d be nice if people would get to this point:

“Perhaps it is time,” says Prof. Pfaus, “to stop treating women’s orgasm as a sociopolitical entity with different sides telling women what they can and cannot experience.”

 

[TalkToMeInSB]

That wasn't exactly what I meant...

He was talking about swingers - that ALL the women that he had met this way were orgasming just from penetration, so his conclusion was that ALL women in general must be able to do so. My point was that women that know that they can't cum this way are much less interested in fucking random partners. Can a woman fuck without an orgasm? Yes. Can she enjoy it? Hell yes! Will she be inclined to seek out this experience if she knows that this is ALL she will get out of it? Much less likely than if she actually could orgasm from penetration.

Ok, thanks for the clarification.

 

[chad132]

This is the reason I wanted to ask the question here about size because I thought I would get an honest answer here and maybe hear from real women what the truth is. I just want the truth.

 

[chad132]

Thank you for your thoughts I am hoping to find a woman who would not mind a man that is small but can go for hours. you give me hope now.

 

[eric_erosfan]

A big dick is more of a visual aphrodisiac. I am above average but still sometimes wish I was Mandingo size just from the pure visual lust that can elicit. But even with an above average dick I am more known for my oral and g-spot skills. My dick doesn't even go in until a woman has had a couple very wet and creamy hip bucking orgasms from my simultaneous oral and finger fucking.

 

[eric_erosfan]

Lust is not a reaction I've actually seen, outside of porn, to a giant cock.

Most frequently, the real reaction has been laughter, like "WTF am I supposed to do with that?"

Definitely not every woman but I have seen many that at least enjoy the sight of a very large cock.

 

[chad132]

This is what I was trying to get the lady to confess to. With a small penis, women do not want anything to do with that. It is as if what MOST women want is a big dick and us small ones are out of luck in getting a bed partner. This is what I spoke of at first and by your answers the conclusion is women want it big or hit the road. Thank you for your honest answers. that is what I have been trying to find out. The truth.

 

[chad132]

I just want the truth so I know if I can or can not ever get another woman. Maybe I will need to look into surgery to get a woman.

 

[IrisAlthea]

This is what I was trying to get the lady to confess to. With a small penis, women do not want anything to do with that. It is as if what MOST women want is a big dick and us small ones are out of luck in getting a bed partner. This is what I spoke of at first and by your answers the conclusion is women want it big or hit the road. Thank you for your honest answers. that is what I have been trying to find out. The truth.

What a perfect example of confirmation bias in the wild.

 

[chad132]

If there are other women who would like to change to score. Right now it's Big cocks 10- small 0, the women have spoken.

 

[AnnieLit]

[

If there are other women who would like to change to score. Right now it's Big cocks 10- small 0, the women have spoken.

Are we reading the same thread? Looks like you are very set in your beliefs and no matter what we (women of Lit) say, you just ignore us. If you want to continue to believe that the size of your cock has anything to do with your (in)ability to satisfy a woman, have it your way.

For the record: one of my best sexual experiences were with a man that out of 5 or 6 times that we were together never ever fucked me even once. I came (some days more than once), he definitely came (he was older than you, so once was his limit), but there was no PIV involved at all. Why? Because he preferred other activities and I preferred whatever was his choice.

 

[chad132]

You may be right and I wrong I was looking for advice as to why a women who leaves her husband after 38 years because a doctor changed my penis size from 5.5 inches to 3.5 inches and she said the size is why she can never squirt again and have full body orgasms is because of size. I was hoping to here from the women from lit if size is a deal breaker.

 

[eric_erosfan]

Thanks for undoing the progress wed made today.

Well, this thread is very strange. A 68 year old man is wondering if some women like big dicks? Of course some women do. Some men like big tits. Some women like hairy chests. Some men like hairy pussies. People have a variety of interests. At 68 guys haven't figured that out?

 

[AnnieLit]

You may be right and I wrong I was looking for advice as to why a women who leaves her husband after 38 years because a doctor changed my penis size from 5.5 inches to 3.5 inches and she said the size is why she can never squirt again and have full body orgasms is because of size. I was hoping to here from the women from lit if size is a deal breaker.

Sorry to bring you the bad news, but your wife leaving you had absolutely nothing to do with your size, neither before the surgery, nor after. She needed an excuse and she chose this one, probably because she knew it will hurt. Or because you live in a state where she needed to give judge a reason and "sexual incompatibility" was one of the options. She needed an explanation why for 38 years you were compatible and now not, well, there was your surgery.

But no, this wasn't the real reason. If there still were love, if she really wanted to spend the rest of her days with you, she would have found a way to get her orgasms. Or even better, *together* you would have figured how to get her there. After all, strap-ons can be used by people of any gender. She chose another way. Her right, sure, but don't take everything so literally.

 

[chad132]

Thank you all I will take heart all your advice.

 

[NaughtyNikkiB]

Wow, what a lot of thought this generated. There are so many questions about the process like where was the survey carried out, what was the wording of the questions, age profile and so much more. Different parts of the world have different attitudes as do different generations. Each relationship has its own dynamic. Some will strike lucky with one partner, some with all, some with none.

For what it is worth, the less pressure (societal) the more relaxed you can be and things can happen in some environments but not others. Don't think about statistics when you get into the situation, enjoy the moment and appreciate who you are with.

 

[Athalia]

The brain is the most important sexual organ. Exercise it: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319596

And the second most important sexual organ is the tongue. Not for stimulation, but for communication.

 

[L1511p]

Its true to say, personal experience tends to drive our belief is whats normal. I am fortunate to be polyamorous and so know well and have known well a lot of women. If asked they will typically say they are the norm, whether its that they regularly cum after about 30 minutes of deep hard vaginal penetration, or after 3 minutes. Its absolutely true that a high percentage need clitoral stimulation to cum quickly and repeatedly, but apart from 69 etc, i would recommend you try a good vibrating cock ring during intercourse, then she will cum strongly and quickly while being penetrated which makes us all happy, and i think over time improves her experience vaginally. Personally i would recommend the tenga smart vibe, or the hot octopuss models.

Of course we are all built differently, it needs to be comfortable but stay put for the man, and to be long enough to reach her clit, which of course varies. There is supposed to be some research that savye a clit head that is closer to the vaginal opening results in cumming more quickly, i dont know, but its true that Katherine the Great is supposed to have had surgery to change that and of course there are today some surgeons removing or reducing clit hoods for this.

 

[Yellowbirdy]

Hi. I know women can sometimes feel it when their hymen is broken. Can a man feel it when he breaks one? Also once a man is inside, does he still have any control or does instinct take over?

 

[spankableBelle]

I've never come from penetration alone... Just once, I'd like to.

Of course...

And ive only been with two partners (one younger, one about 30 years older, both men) in my my life (I'm 52), who cared about me enough to figure out what got me to orgasm at all...
I can get myself there just fine, multiple times a day if I want, but with a partner... It varies and most of the time, they have been focused on their own pleasure, and if I'm honest, so have I... (there's trauma there, we all have it in one way or another)
I think, should I ever have sex again, I'll be much more selfish...

Everyone's experience is different.

 

[IrisAlthea]

I know women can sometimes feel it when their hymen is broken. Can a man feel it when he breaks one?

It is different for different women, as you said and if the woman doesn’t notice, neither will he.
I think it is rare that it is so noticable that he can be sure.

Most descriptions you read in fiction get it very wrong.
The tissue called hymen is very near the opening of the vagina, is usually both thin and elastic and rarely covers the opening extensively.

Also once a man is inside, does he still have any control or does instinct take over?

It depends on what you mean.
I’d say that men are usually quite able but not necessarily happy to stop if needed.
If we are talking about stopping at the right moment to pull out in time, not to get the woman pregnant, you will not want to gamble your future on it. Condoms are a way better option.

 

[AnnieLit]

Hi. I know women can sometimes feel it when their hymen is broken. Can a man feel it when he breaks one? Also once a man is inside, does he still have any control or does instinct take over?

As a woman I wouldn't know the answer to the first question, but the second one greatly depends on a man. At 17 it's all about instincts, at 40 and beyond men definitely have enough self control to do whatever they want. There is a point of no return even for them, but before that they are in control.

But, as Iris said, don't use this for birth control. Not because he can't or wouldn't pull out, but because a woman can get pregnant even if her partner pulls out each and every time. Precum too has sperm in it and no man can control or even feel it's discharge.

 

[Yellowbirdy]

TY!