Things a mate should NEVER say to the One they are having sex with!

[thestruggle]

Truth.

I like big butts, to tell the truth. My friends all agree.

I see the thing, that you did there.

 

[Scuttle Buttin']

I seem unable to advance things beyond you.

 

[thestruggle]

I seem unable to advance things beyond you.

You'll always have strawberries! See? There's that.

 

[Niceandbrutal]

Worst thing I've ever said? Picture this: yours truly has been lucky enough to end up in bed with a woman, and everything is going well until we decide to switch positions from missionary to doggystyle. I look down at her buttcrack and there's a thin veneer of faeces smeared around. I look down and calmly tell her: "You didn't wipe properly."

That effectively killed the mood.

 

[smallgirl]

Worst thing I've ever said? Picture this: yours truly has been lucky enough to end up in bed with a woman, and everything is going well until we decide to switch positions from missionary to doggystyle. I look down at her buttcrack and there's a thin veneer of faeces smeared around. I look down and calmly tell her: "You didn't wipe properly."

That effectively killed the mood.

Ok, that got a laugh out of me...lol.

 

[havinfun50]

But... You said you liked that last time!

 

[The_gladiator]

You're brother is so much better at that.

 

[Omissbehavin69]

"Is it in yet?"

and

"I'm not sure!"

 

[Omissbehavin69]

Bahahahahahah... Good one.

 

[DarkWarrioress]

That's a WHAT?!

 

[Loving50]

I have a cold and while enjoying some excellent phone sex earlier I got more and more congested the closer I came to cumming.

Right after the first cum I apologized for my stuffed up sound and then had to laugh as I said, "I sound just like Rudolph when he wears the fake nose!"

It was true and we laughed. My cold didn't keep us from cumming though.

So there's my contribution tonight. You can get away with saying almost anything after sex as long as you use a sexy Rudolph voice.

Sweet rest, Sweets.

 

[absorb]

It was only ten minutes if you were checking the clock!

 

[cravon4884]

Oh, c'mon... It's not big enough to hurt that bad...

 

[DeliciousMaiden]

... it doesn't touch the sides ...

 

[cravon4884]

It's not my fault... I was born with it.

 

[DeliciousMaiden]

No you have ... of course you've met my twin ...

(LOL - very silly but... meh ... can't help it ... that kinda mood!)

 

[cravon4884]

Oh... wait... you were serious about that?!

 

[DeliciousMaiden]

No.... of course the condom didn't break ... what condom ... ?

 

[cravon4884]

*long groan* You did say that you're on birth control, right?

 

[SOT74]

Worst thing I've ever said? Picture this: yours truly has been lucky enough to end up in bed with a woman, and everything is going well until we decide to switch positions from missionary to doggystyle. I look down at her buttcrack and there's a thin veneer of faeces smeared around. I look down and calmly tell her: "You didn't wipe properly."

That effectively killed the mood.

Oh man that is funny!