literotica all about sex-positivity. So why such moralizing comments on Loving Wives?

[offkilter123]

I have just had a new story of mine published in Loving Wives. I am just watching it and deleting comments as they come in. Most comments are not required and are systematically removed. I usually forewarn people that I will delete comments and I do.

I’m the opposite in that I will not delete any comment. If you’re going to believe the good things people say about your writing then you have to be willing to believe the bad. As far as comments that attack me personally? I laugh and leave them up since they say more about the commenter than they say about me.

I’ve also been known to intentionally stir up the right wing nut jobs that flock to LW by throwing in a comment mocking Fox News or Orange Jesus so I’m willing to take my lumps for those.

 

[Rob_Royale]

literotica all about sex-positivity. So why such moralizing comments on Loving Wives?​

That is the $64000 question, isn't it? After all, this is all just fantasy, right? I mean if someone wants to write about a wife who wants to get fucked by her husband's poker buddies while he's tied to a chair, watching, why can't it just be a fun fantasy? How does morality even become an issue? No real person is being hurt or betrayed and things we enjoy in fantasy rarely enter into our real life.

I think the answer is that some people just have to be a shithead and piss on things other people enjoy. These miserable people are to be pitied. Something or someone has damaged them (and having one's heart broken by a cheating wife, will do that, I'm told) and they are just taking it out on strangers anonymously. Sad really.

 

[HordHolm]

I think the answer is that some people just have to be a shithead and piss on things other people enjoy. These miserable people are to be pitied. Something or someone has damaged them (and having one's heart broken by a cheating wife, will do that, I'm told) and they are just taking it out on strangers anonymously. Sad really.

I'd add the 'in the closet' argument for some of the more antagonistic trolling. Mr Troll reads something that hits too close to home with his secret, 'immoral' desire that he's been hating himself for. So destroy it, smash it, and maybe all the bad desires will go away.

 

[Bodington]

OK I read your story and left a comment. I wouldn’t worry about comments one receives when posting on LW. I write mostly in the Novels and Novellas where I seldom attract comments. I did submit one stand alone story to the LW category which by far attracted more comments than any other one of my 249 submissions. I was most bemused that a plurality of the complaints were that the story should have been submitted in the Interracial category instead of Loving Wives. This prompted me to ponder did my readers worry that those readers who like to read interracial stories would miss out on my story because I posted in the LW category.

 

[LMWM321]

Thanks for the helpful comments Bodington! And yes, I should have chosen a different collectible vinyl record. A clean copy of the 1st pressing of Wake of Poseidon fetches no more than $200.

As for the negative comments, I'll ignore the merely nasty ones, and will delete only those suggesting violence. Strange that they would even exist, but such is life.

 

[SimonDoom]

Literotica is definitely NOT all about sex positivity. Some people like it negative. They're included in the big tent this Site provides.

 

[Bazzle]

One person's erotica is another person's trigger. So like Simon says (no not that game) some will be hunting out negative sex. The last thing they want is positivity.
There is such a width in scope here and authors are supplying stories to such a wide spectrum of eyeballs and emotions that morals sometimes trip up?
Us authors are screaming out for praise. We are confused by critical feedback.
I find either morality about content or grammar yet no feedback on plot or character development or if I chose the right colour bra for the protagonist.
Us authors can spend hours crafting a yarn that you feel turns you or your target audience on, yet something you miss like a typo or grammar trip up "ruins" it for a certain person. That person will shout the loudest rather than the person who is grabbing the tissue because the story worked for them?

 

[Sinstories]

Trolls gonna troll. The internet has created (or provided a forum to amplify) people who get off on tearing down others.

 

[lovecraft68]

Sex is positive, people aren't.

 

[AchtungNight]

There are some sorts of sex that aren't welcome here. The site owner does not welcome eroticized violence or characters under a certain age having sexual thoughts. Artificial aging and political or religious content are also not welcome when blatant. And it's difficult to slip consensual mind control into the fanfic section. I'm not about to do Laurel's job for her, but I still will allow her to carry it out when she decides to do so. It's a pity she hasn't yet found a way to stop every troll who negatively trashes authors' work.

 

[LMWM321]

I'm guessing that LW attracts the curiosity of men whose wives weren't faithful. And instead of reflecting on the reasons why - ie., maybe they're shitty husbands, or maybe it's just that their wives have a natural, irrepressible need for occasional strange (just like many men) - they chose to instead shoot the messenger.

 

[Lifestyle66]

I'm guessing that LW attracts the curiosity of men whose wives weren't faithful. And instead of reflecting on the reasons why - ie., maybe they're shitty who husbands, or maybe it's just that their wives have a natural, irrepressible need for occasional strange (just like many men) - they chose to instead shoot the messenger.

It's "irreconcilable differences".

The young and dumb marry, thinking they've found the "love of their life", the spouse who is perfect for them. Then reality strikes because they've BOTH hidden things from each other, whether those are habits, hobbies, or secret desires. You can't really KNOW SOMEONE until you've lived in the same house and shared the same bed for more than a few YEARS!

And age changes people, both physically and through their work and social circles. A husband or wife meets someone else who is their NEW "love of their life", or the spouse just becomes a mirror image of their mother or father.

LW seems to be the gathering point for those husbands who were traumatized by cheating wives who think "OMG, I can't stick my pee-pee in there now", and others who got over it by saying "go ahead and fuck her, her hole's still there for me later!"

 

[AchtungNight]

Lifestyle is correct. As my uncle put it after his divorce, love may be blind, but marriage is an eye opener. No marriage is ever 100% easy or comfortable either. I remember my wife was okay with casual affairs for years and never told me or asked my opinion on the matter. Even after making it clear we were divorced in spirit and waiting on the paperwork. I didn't like it, but... there's a reason I've always been more into ethical non-monogamy than monogamy. My one spouse so far was never faithful to me emotionally or otherwise. I wasn't entirely faithful to her emotionally either. :sigh: I will never shame any story about infidelity here. But I will continue to delete comments of those who would do otherwise on my stories. Authors work hard on their fics. What does it profit trolls to indulge their negative whims? Not much in the long run.

 

[HordHolm]

FWIW, I recently posted a story into Loving Wives for the first time (https://literotica.com/s/swimming-in-the-rubicon for anyone who's interested), and for every negative comment I've had a couple of positive ones, including a couple of really nice, thoughtful ones. I know that LW can be a troll hangout, but I'd prefer to focus on the positive, and the readership there is a long way from being exclusively cave-dwellers.

 

[Rob_Royale]

My one foray into the LW category has done pretty well. It was about a couple with an open marriage, in which the couple kept a guy/gal on the side. But the story ended with them coming back to monogamy. I think it confused the trolls. The response was overwhelmingly positive, but there were a couple of readers where it really touched a nerve. Veterans are a passionate lot. Though I'd told myself I wouldn't delete bad comments, I did end up deleting a pair of them.

I will be back in that category eventually.

 

[Lifestyle66]

My latest foray (my 20th) into the Loving Wives fight published last night and is doing surprisingly well (relatively, LOL).

"Do We Need to Talk" (6k words) is about the guy's first-person reflections on his failed first marriage to his HS sexy girlfriend, and how and what he'll do to prevent it from happening to his second, 20-year marriage to the "perfect wife" when he thinks things are changing. It's not a BTB or RAAC story.

In LW, you need to change your perspective on "success". The story published six hours ago, and within the first hour had almost 1,000 views with 47 votes and several adding it to their favorites. Of course, the average rate was 1.7, but I've come to expect the first wave of readers to be the haters when I write counter to their love of revenge. Now six hours later, it has 4,800 views and 177 votes, and risen to 2.34!

 

[Carolandbob]

We’ve only been posting on loving wives for about four weeks and we’re getting the occasional hate comment. Usually anonymous, same time of day so we can guess where they’re coming from.. One guy not anonymous has been posting vile comments for years,, seems all he does. We delete and take encouragement from all the saved to favourites that we see.

 

[Carolandbob]

My one foray into the LW category has done pretty well. It was about a couple with an open marriage, in which the couple kept a guy/gal on the side. But the story ended with them coming back to monogamy. I think it confused the trolls. The response was overwhelmingly positive, but there were a couple of readers where it really touched a nerve. Veterans are a passionate lot. Though I'd told myself I wouldn't delete bad comments, I did end up deleting a pair of them.

I will be back in that category eventually.

Probably the same vet that’s given us grief, he’s been posting vile comments for years. Should be banned.

 

[lovecraft68]

This is no different than social media. Lit is a platform where people post stories and others can react to them.

Meaning Lit is neither positive or negative in and of itself. It's the people using it that are the good/bad.

And again, like social media where there is anonymity and no chance of reprisal for your words and hate, people come here to abuse others to make themselves feel better.

 

[lovecraft68]

It's not just here but everywhere. People tend to lash out when they're not in a good place, and if you retaliate, your situation is probably even worse.

Right, that's why I equated here with social media. X and Facebook and all the other sites aren't good or bad, its a tool, and if the tools using it are a-holes that's what makes the platform toxic.

And like you said, of you dare to defend yourself, you get attacked even more.

This is why no matter how nasty of a comment I receive, I don't reply to it, and I won't delete it, because (in my opinion) if I do that, they come back again with the "Oh, can't handle the truth?" BS, so I leave it to show it has no power over me.

 

[Biggalute]

I have a LW story in my head, mainly written from the womans point of view. Don't know if I can be bothered with all the vitriol that's bound to follow.

 

[PapaRomantic]

Probably the same vet that’s given us grief, he’s been posting vile comments for years. Should be banned.

I think the person you're talking about has read one of my Loving Wives stories three times, and surprisingly, he hated it each and every time. And yet I've also written stories he likes, because I've written from both sides of the issue. I leave his comments, because he's entertaining to anyone else who is reading the comments.

 

[LMWM321]

Had I read my own stories 10 years ago, I might have felt the same about them as the readers who post the ugly "cuck.. and whore.." comments (though I would never post the ugly comment). But now that the cement of our marriage has fully cured, I have a completely different feeling. Not only does the idea of her being with other men fail to upset me, it actually excites the hell out of me.

I can easily recall when the idea of my wife being with another man seemed abhorrent. That was probably the case for the first 15+ years of our marriage. Back then, I felt her being with another man posed a grave threat to our marriage; that she might sooo prefer sex with him that she'd leave me (and our kids) for the better lover. ..I suppose that is the nerve that my stories hit in other peoples' minds.

Over the years, that concern faded. Now, the idea that she'd leave me for another man simply b/c of a better orgasm seems utterly ridiculous. We've raised awesome kids, built a home, shared the love of our extended family, we still fuck like 20-somethings, and we look forward to sharing our retirement together and enjoying grandkids. Today, I know that nothing...nothing... would take one of us from he other - certainly not "better" sex. So, now the idea of her having sex - just sex, not sleeping with, vacationing with, romantic dinners, etc.. - with another man simply to scratch a natural, irrepressible urge, doesn't bother me at all. Have at it! ..And I hope the orgasms are awesome. I feel no more threatened by the idea than when she goes to get a massage. Call me weird.

 

[lc69hunter]

Had I read my own stories 10 years ago, I might have felt the same about them as the readers who post the ugly "cuck.. and whore.." comments (though I would never post the ugly comment). But now that the cement of our marriage has fully cured, I have a completely different feeling. Not only does the idea of her being with other men fail to upset me, it actually excites the hell out of me.

I can easily recall when the idea of my wife being with another man seemed abhorrent. That was probably the case for the first 15+ years of our marriage. Back then, I felt her being with another man posed a grave threat to our marriage; that she might sooo prefer sex with him that she'd leave me (and our kids) for the better lover.

Over the years, that concern faded. Now, the idea that she'd leave me for another man simply b/c of a better orgasm seems utterly ridiculous. We've raised awesome kids, built a home, shared the love of our extended family, we still fuck like 20-somethings, and we look forward to sharing our retirement together and enjoying grandkids. Today, I know that nothing...nothing... would take one of us from he other - certainly not "better" sex. So, now the idea of her having sex - just sex, not sleeping with, vacationing with, romantic dinners, etc.. - with another man simply to scratch a natural, irrepressible urge, doesn't bother me at all. Have at it! ..And I hope the orgasms are awesome. I feel no more threatened by the idea than when she goes to get a massage. Call me weird.

Some men never mature to that point. Always remember, the most important thing in any marriage is the core bond between husband and wife.

 

[Lifestyle66]

Had I read my own stories 10 years ago, I might have felt the same about them as the readers who post the ugly "cuck.. and whore.." comments (though I would never post the ugly comment). But now that the cement of our marriage has fully cured, I have a completely different feeling. Not only does the idea of her being with other men fail to upset me, it actually excites the hell out of me.

I can easily recall when the idea of my wife being with another man seemed abhorrent. That was probably the case for the first 15+ years of our marriage. Back then, I felt her being with another man posed a grave threat to our marriage; that she might sooo prefer sex with him that she'd leave me (and our kids) for the better lover. ..I suppose that is the nerve that my stories hit in other peoples' minds.

Over the years, that concern faded. Now, the idea that she'd leave me for another man simply b/c of a better orgasm seems utterly ridiculous. We've raised awesome kids, built a home, shared the love of our extended family, we still fuck like 20-somethings, and we look forward to sharing our retirement together and enjoying grandkids. Today, I know that nothing...nothing... would take one of us from he other - certainly not "better" sex. So, now the idea of her having sex - just sex, not sleeping with, vacationing with, romantic dinners, etc.. - with another man simply to scratch a natural, irrepressible urge, doesn't bother me at all. Have at it! ..And I hope the orgasms are awesome. I feel no more threatened by the idea than when she goes to get a massage. Call me weird.

It sounds like you've matured in your relationship to get rid of jealousy and EXTREME selfishness, which IMO would be just to deny your wife some fun.

As long as your spouse is there for you when you need them, and you both manage the risks of pregnancy and STD's, then it takes a selfish person to insist their spouse MUST forego having more fun.

EDIT: When my ex-wife and I attended marriage counseling, I pointed out to her and the counselor; "She doesn't want to have sex with me, and she hardly even LIKES spending any time with me. So, OUTSOURCE, and I'll find sex elsewhere!" Neither of them seemed to think that was an option. So, I divorced the selfish bitch.