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[Alex De Kok]

A fun read

I've just been enjoying myself reading through this thread. I don't think I write anything to really disturb the trolls. The best I can offer are these -

Verbosity
07/23/07 By: Anonymous in Massachusetts
The object of a sexy story is the SEX. Long-winded story telling is for putting children to sleep.

storyline too slow
07/22/07 By: Anonymous
sorry, boring

both from 'What you see is what you get', which just happens to be my Nude Day contest winner!

And this -

uhm...
12/20/04 By: Anonymous in United States
This was the cheesiest story ever! Who actually calls somebody "my lover?"

from my 'French kissing for girls'

Almost all the rest of my PCs are at least polite, most are positive, although I get fed up with Don98765-or-some-such-string-of-numbers criticizing me for having the nerve to let my characters use contraception. My personal favourite came via email, about my story 'Goody-Two-Shoes makes a friend'. From anonymous, of course, and it reads (exactly) like this -

'jesus christ! this is the most convoluted piece of dog shit I've ever tried to wade through. mickey spillane you ain't. come to think of it a couple of monkeys and a typewriter and we'd have something better than this. what a complete and total waste of time.'

Given the accurate spelling and punctuation, I would have suspected a broken or absent shift key, had it not been for the exclamation mark correctly added. I printed this one out and keep it taped up next to the PC. It keeps my ego under control!

Alex

 

[BlackShanglan]

Alex, well done on the win! I enjoyed the comments you posted. As for this one ...

'jesus christ! this is the most convoluted piece of dog shit I've ever tried to wade through. mickey spillane you ain't. come to think of it a couple of monkeys and a typewriter and we'd have something better than this. what a complete and total waste of time.'

Given the accurate spelling and punctuation, I would have suspected a broken or absent shift key, had it not been for the exclamation mark correctly added.

Possibly it's the product of one of those "innovative" young authors who feels that the best way to demonstrate his or her daring and challenging originality of thought is to apply it to capitalization?

Shanglan

 

[Darkniciad]

No, I haven't read your latest "best selling masterpiece" LIAR, let alone commented on it…. I've yet to find anything of yours that qualifies, and have long ago ceased botheringSURE YOU HAVE.

*laugh* You honestly think I left that comment, don't you?

The imaginary intrigue you see all around you here is far more involved and interesting than the "plots" of any story of yours I've read. You should tap into that some time.

Well, you have fun with that delusional paranoia, I won't spoil it for you any more. Have a nice day in the land of make believe!

 

[SweetWitch]

I was just going through my email archives and found this:

-Oh, btw, I don't think your chosen nom de plume is
edgy enough to attract the right kind of attention.
What about ShHaEuWnItTiCnHg or HsAhUeNwTiItNcGh or
YOURwitchMIND?

Ummmmm...?

 

[MarshAlien]

Alex, well done on the win! I enjoyed the comments you posted. As for this one ...



Possibly it's the product of one of those "innovative" young authors who feels that the best way to demonstrate his or her daring and challenging originality of thought is to apply it to capitalization?

Shanglan

Although, oddly, he did capitalize "I've." Close, but he cannot compete with the Master of Capitalization.

 

[MarshAlien]

Sorry, no. I made it up, in response to the brilliant inspiration of "a masterpiece of capitalization."

Honestly, I think that those sorts of wickedly cruel pseudo-compliments are the best and most amusing critiques possible. I've always loved the old standby of "nice margins."

Yeah, I knew that, too. But I thought we could get a whole "damning with faint praise" sub-thread going.

 

[MarshAlien]

I was just going through my email archives and found this:



Ummmmm...?

Yes, that would have been a great name. Hard to pronounce, maybe. But so you.

 

[SweetWitch]

Yes, that would have been a great name. Hard to pronounce, maybe. But so you.

Instead of the artist, formerly known as Prince, I could be the writer, formerly known as SweetWitch...

 

[BlackShanglan]

Yeah, I knew that, too. But I thought we could get a whole "damning with faint praise" sub-thread going.

"Strong use of white space."

"Impressive formatting."

"Interesting avatar."

(And, for SweetWitch ...)

"Distinctive choice of pen name."

 

[SweetWitch]

"Strong use of white space."

"Impressive formatting."

"Interesting avatar."

(And, for SweetWitch ...)

"Distinctive choice of pen name."

Distinctive? You crack me up.

 

[Alex De Kok]

Although, oddly, he did capitalize "I've." Close, but he cannot compete with the Master of Capitalization.

Oops! Just re-read it. He/she/it didn't - that was me on auto-pilot! My bad. Should have read "i've".

Sorry 'bout that.

Alex

 

[MarshAlien]

Oops! Just re-read it. He/she/it didn't - that was me on auto-pilot! My bad. Should have read "i've".

Sorry 'bout that.

Alex

No problem. People with fatter collars than you're wearing have shown me up before.

Wait - you mean that isn't you in the picture? My bad.

 

[MzDeviancy]

Instead of the artist, formerly known as Prince, I could be the writer, formerly known as SweetWitch...

You could just turn yourself into a symbol, like he did.

 

[MarshAlien]

You could just turn yourself into a symbol, like he did.

[size=+4]ð[/size], the writer formerly known as SweetWitch

 

[SweetWitch]

[size=+4]ð[/size]

What the hell is that thing?

 

[MarshAlien]

What the hell is that thing?

What? You think it makes you look fat?

 

[SweetWitch]

What? You think it makes you look fat?

tsk

Try this one: †

 

[MarshAlien]

tsk

Try this one: †

Seems a little violently religious to me. Sort of Thomas a Becket-y. I don't think it captures the sweet side of you.

 

[SweetWitch]

Seems a little violently religious to me. Sort of Thomas a Becket-y. I don't think it captures the sweet side of you.

It’s a misnomer, Babe. I don’t have a sweet side, so stop trying to get on it.

 

[MarshAlien]

It’s a misnomer, Babe. I don’t have a sweet side, so stop trying to get on it.

Oh, stop. I mean, just look at your sweet little avatar. Actually, I am looking at your sweet little avatar, and I'm wondering what your left hand is doing there. Seems to be awfully far inside that dress. Deep pockets, maybe?

 

[SweetWitch]

Oh, stop. I mean, just look at your sweet little avatar. Actually, I am looking at your sweet little avatar, and I'm wondering what your left hand is doing there. Seems to be awfully far inside that dress. Deep pockets, maybe?

If you must know, I'm pulling out my wand, getting ready to follow through on that threat I made. You know. The one where I offered to turn you into a toad?

 

[tickledkitty]

If you must know, I'm pulling out my wand, getting ready to follow through on that threat I made. You know. The one where I offered to turn you into a toad?

A great horny toad?

 

[MarshAlien]

A great horny toad?

Can't help that; we're all horny around here. Speaking of which, witch, you and your avatar should read tickledkitty and my collaboration (links in both our signatures). It's in the Toys and Masturbation category.

 

[SweetWitch]

Can't help that; we're all horny around here. Speaking of which, witch, you and your avatar should read tickledkitty and my collaboration (links in both our signatures). It's in the Toys and Masturbation category.

I already read it and commented. Keep up much?

TK, he's already a horny toad.

 

[tickledkitty]

I already read it and commented. Keep up much?

TK, he's already a horny toad.

G'morning, Molly. I know.