Long Distance Relationships

[JennyOmanHill]

Hi jenny, Oman...
I was just on the phone to my lover... her phone does not make it to the shower... damn...
I read some of the posts from this thread... we cried together over some... we will be together...
We are both in our early 40's... meeting like this is not what I would have thought was something I would do...
Just as the saying goes.. NO ONE can tell what the future holds...

Nite all... have a good night and tomorrow...

tc

Take care, T.C.! (My "mike" doesn't stretch into the shower either!!)

Thanks for sharing this thread, and I hope it gives you the support and "outlet" that it has for me and many others. Age is just a number, yet I sometimes feel that it might be an asset to getting through an LDR since we "oldies" tend to be more patient and sometimes more appreciative to the little things in life!

Each situation is different, though. I'm speaking for myself since I don't think I would have been ready for this 10 or 20 years ago!

Darling!! I certainly know that everything YOU do you do for me!! How lucky I am!! Thanks again for being a "Bob" too!

 

[hatara]

Well they know that Marty is a friend and that he is important to me. But my parents are of the belief that if your not married you simply don't need to have sex.

It's not just the timing but they are doing things at home now and selling a house and their life is in turmoil right now. Unfortunately this means that the usual bickering escalates and I don't need that added stress.

As for Marty this will be the last time in a long time that he will be able to visit and I want to be able to enjoy it. It is also...I don't know how to describe it...it's always exciting and fun but it's also more peaceful when he's here. I don't know if it's because I just refuse to deal with everyone else or his personality or how we are together but I could use that more than anything else right now.

 

[Top Cat]

Hat,

I feel an underlying tension... maybe because I have never meet Heather...

But then again.. I can have a stressful day, call her and within minutes be relaxed and calm... being with the person you love, whether on the phone or in person, shoulsd have a peaceful feel to it.

I think you need, (now this is good, coming from someone who can't tell his parents I don't want to go to their place), to tell them straight... You appreciate their concern, you just feel that you would be more relaxed if they did not come. They have enough on their plate right now...

Tension would not be good for anyone... right now for you .. it would be the worst. Tell them straight... that's my advice.

Jenny....
I make decisions NOW based on what Heather would want me to do... so like Oman.. Everything I do I do for her. (nice song too)

thanks for the support... I feel better in the *gosh* week I have been here. It seems like a lot longer than that.

tc

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Glad you feel "at home" here, T.C.!

Although my Mom is NOT aware that Oman and I met online (ironically I decided to just mention I met this man at my local hangout!), she shocked me when SHE suggested that he stay WITH me when he came to visit (her words: "Why should he spend extra money for a hotel room? You've got plenty of room there!"). I continue to tell her that our relationship is "ON" and that we constantly link up through the computer now.

Small lie (and I usually always tell the truth!), but I'm open about every other part of our relationship with her and the rest of my family. It makes me very happy being able to share my love with Oman so openly.

Hat, I think just by saying that you want to be alone right now to your folks might be the best way (without mentioning Marty at all). Again, best of luck with whatever you decide.

 

[Top Cat]

Glad you feel "at home" here, T.C.!

Hat, I think just by saying that you want to be alone right now to your folks might be the best way (without mentioning Marty at all). Again, best of luck with whatever you decide.

I feel the same... don't mention Marty... That would be like a parent magnet...

Hope things work out for you Hat.

tc

 

[hatara]

LOL I have no intention of telling them Marty would be here. They would be here in a heartbeat then just to meet him and see where he would be staying! LOL

Parents you have to love them.

I will probably be honest and just tell them that a visit right now is not what I need in the least. They are thinking about looking at property up here and if they choose to do that it's fine but they don't need to visit me when they do. First though I am going to wait to see if they actually decide on what they are doing! LOL No sense making it an issue if it doesn't have to be. *shrug*

 

[mayi]

hi all......just checking to see if he is around.....gues not

hope you get to feeling better hat

mayi

 

[Ebonyfire]

this is what I do

Thanks TC. I just can't imagine them bringing their motorhome to a state park about 10 miles away when Marty will be staying here that week. I think I have to bite the bullet and think of a reason to tell them not to come! LOL Marty did make a few suggestions as to what to say but I have to give this one some careful thought. One wrong word and they could wind up here for a week!!!

Incidently any and all suggestions would be greatly appreciated and what excuse are you using?

Ok, I lie!

I tell them that I am going out of town on business that week. A training class. Then I do not answer the phone. I use the voice mail to screen them so they will not catch me at home.

Ebony

 

[hatara]

LOL thought of that Ebony but I am not suppose to be driving and I am a returning college student so that's a no go. LOL

Thanks for the suggestion though!

 

[Lady_Sam]

Hat, I hope everything with your health goes well. It almost sounds like some sort of congenital defect. My thoughts are with you.

As to what to tell your parents...good question. Someone let me know when they figure it out...as my parents live 5 miles away.

 

[draznyte]

Well, having had experience with that. I'd say, it takes a lot of effort on both persons. The willingness to actually give trust into a person that you meet on the net at times is found hitting a speed bump cause let's face it, there are psycho's out there. They kill people and make 'em disappear. However, there are times when you get this feeling, in your heart and in your soul that you feel that you can trust this person. It takes a long time to gain that trust and actually meeting in person is the third or second step. First it's Online, then phone.. then it's like, you just can't handle hearing the voice. You yearn to be by that person, see the look in their eyes and smell the scent they give off. Trust me, I've been there... just be careful, sometimes things don't go as you'd want them to. I know, still getting over mine.

 

[hatara]

Well my sister had the form of this that had to do with the blood pressure and that's why they thought that is what I had. I am sure I will be fine LOL just time for a new diet along with those meds.

 

[draznyte]

And somehow, my *NEW* msg ended up being a new thread that I sent towards uh, somewhere. Damn, I don't know where I'm putting these things. Don't mind me weird guy.
-----------------------------

<h1>NOT A VIRGIN!!!</h1>

>.>

*points at the left, under his name, then smirks*

Not like it's a bad thing though, but still.. heh and I'm thinking it means, because of the pic thing that it says "virgin" but oh well, trying to lighten my.. post from before.

 

[twodogs]

Well, having had experience with that. I'd say, it takes a lot of effort on both persons. The willingness to actually give trust into a person that you meet on the net at times is found hitting a speed bump cause let's face it, there are psycho's out there. They kill people and make 'em disappear. However, there are times when you get this feeling, in your heart and in your soul that you feel that you can trust this person. It takes a long time to gain that trust and actually meeting in person is the third or second step. First it's Online, then phone.. then it's like, you just can't handle hearing the voice. You yearn to be by that person, see the look in their eyes and smell the scent they give off. Trust me, I've been there... just be careful, sometimes things don't go as you'd want them to. I know, still getting over mine.

I can relate to what your saying, it takes a lot of work and yes on both parts.
Never made it very far but far enough to set myself up for something that i knew better than to do it , but shit i got caught up in something that i havent had for years, but moved to fast she doesn't know what she wants.
When you find one that's been in a bad deal and sayes she don't know leave her alone,your setting your self up for hurt big time.
Now don't get me wrong i know where she is coming from and what she has been through, but for both of your sake walk away

 

[hatara]

Ok I am confused. I think that we missed part of draznyte post. Incidently you will be a virgin until you make 30 posts so the only answer to that one is to keep posting.

 

[Lady_Sam]

Erg, trying to stay awake until Daeth *gods so hard not to type his name* gets back from getting food AND my laundry *growls about children not going to bed when they're supposed to* gets done. On an upside...I've had lots of free time tonight

 

[draznyte]

I'm not a virgin baby *Trying to act completely cool and all manly like and yet, utterly making himself look like a fool and embarrasing himself in front of thousands of visitors. A crooked grin forming on his lips.. such a flair for humor.*

 

[Lady_Sam]

I'm not a virgin baby *Trying to act completely cool and all manly like and yet, utterly making himself look like a fool and embarrasing himself in front of thousands of visitors. A crooked grin forming on his lips.. such a flair for humor.*

See didn't take you long at all...took me oooh about a week to lose the virgin status...and about two nights to get from 350 to where I am now...

 

[draznyte]

Well them amor, I'll just have to try harder to reach up there. Though I wonder if we get any points for writing stuff. Mwahaha, I shall begin on my first post which will be rather large and confusing probably.. ^_^

 

[hatara]

LOL Lady_Sam I used to live with my aunt a few blocks from my parents. It is why I moved 150 miles away. LOL now that they need a new and bigger house so my aunt can live with them they want to move so they are no more than an hour away!!

Oh well 2 years of school and I can move again! LOL

 

[Lady_Sam]

Hehe Hatara, you know what will be the worse, is when and if I move, my mom will hate the fact that I'm taking her grandson away.

 

[hatara]

Big time ouch. I hear how I am her baby and now she says with this I need her! *sigh* You can never win with parents I don't even try I have just learned to lay down rules now.

 

[Lady_Sam]

Big time ouch. I hear how I am her baby and now she says with this I need her! *sigh* You can never win with parents I don't even try I have just learned to lay down rules now.

Yeah I know, but it's hard to do because she has been such a help in this last year. But the thought of being with Daeth, mmmmm. Either way, she'll have to get used to the idea of me moving out of state at the very least.

 

[hatara]

Well she was lucky I had been thinking of moving when I graduated but have now decided against it. Yes Marty had a large part to do with that thinking but I think that I have also gotten used to the heat now and would just visit to see snow!

Eventually they all have to get used to the fact that we are grown women and have to make lives for ourselves. She had been doing very well about that until this happened now we will have to work on it again.

 

[Top Cat]

Eventually they all have to get used to the fact that we are grown women and have to make lives for ourselves.

Hat,

My LDR's mother is still trying to tell her what to do... in her 40's and her mother still thinks she can control her life. I hope her mother can handle the fact that her daughter is coming to Australia to be with me... to spend the rest of our lives together.

hope you fair well with your parents over this... we all need our parents, no matter what age, (imagine if they were not there) to use as a sounding post. It just gets on your goat when they try to run your life...

off my soap box now...

tc