Long Distance Relationships

[JennyOmanHill]

Re: Huggssss

As much as I may have brought negativeness to this thread Jenny.. I send positive thoughts to your & omans way.
...
Can I ask you something....?
When the days come & I'm hopeful for you that they do ..you will share with us all (where it all began ) pics of the two of you celebrating your 1st Anniversary, 5th, 10th, 25th, 50th ....



*~* Spanks *~* & more huggsssss

Hugggs back to you Spanktress! It may still take a while due to our financial realities, but I'm sure Oman and I will be meeting. And we'll definitely take pics to send to you and all our other lit buddies! When I began this thread my hopes were to find both the positive and negatives. Fortunately, we've received such honest answers, and a lot of good wishes along the way.

And, boy, I certainly needed that hug this morning. Thanks!

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Re: NOT TO SCARE EITHER OF YOU!

Heck when and if that day comes I better be invited to the wedding. Enjoy the ride and make it happen. Peace!

oops.... (see next post!)

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Wedding??

Heck when and if that day comes I better be invited to the wedding. Enjoy the ride and make it happen. Peace!

Tulip... if that day comes, you'll be the flower girl!!

 

[omahaman2]

what?wedding?anniversaries?

my dearest friends. boy what did i wake up to this morning?while i slept i was married off and am celebrating my 50th anniversary.I really dont know where jenny and me are headed together in life but i sure am here for all of it,from a hug , a tender kiss, holding her in my arms to where ever life leads us. thanks for all the good wishes,all i know is she holds my heart in her hands and i hold hers.down in my heart,i know we are going to prove that at least one long distance relationship is doing to work,really work.guess i shouldnt have used the word work because its no work loving jenny. have a good day my freinds oman

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Re: what?wedding?anniversaries?

my dearest friends. boy what did i wake up to this morning?while i slept i was married off and am celebrating my 50th anniversary.I really dont know where jenny and me are headed together in life but i sure am here for all of it,from a hug , a tender kiss, holding her in my arms to where ever life leads us. thanks for all the good wishes,all i know is she holds my heart in her hands and i hold hers.down in my heart,i know we are going to prove that at least one long distance relationship is doing to work,really work.guess i shouldnt have used the word work because its no work loving jenny. have a good day my freinds oman

Yes, Oman, a lot seems to happen here overnight!

I love you!

 

[Georgia Girl]

Our story

At the request of Jenny, whom we know from the tub, I share with you the story of Savant and I.

Georgia Girl:
Somewhere around the end of September/first of October Savant and I began talking in the tub. When we first began to talk it was mostly just about life and day to day stuff. I'm really not even sure when we got around to ages or where the other lived. We discovered when we did ask those questions that we live on seperate coast (me in GA and he in WA) and that ten years seperate us in age (I am older). By this time, none of that mattered. We normally spend around 5 hours a day talking online and end the day on the phone. We both work on computers so this is no problem for us.

Savant73:
I remember it as being quite an interesting conversation, in the beginning. I was talking with some of the Tubbers about tattoos, and Georgia happened into the room. We ended up discussing it and assorted other things. Most of our initial conversations actaully seemed pretty surreal, given that we are two totally different people, but the number of parallels in our lives is very interesting. For example, her son, and I have the same birthday (not year, you ninny), and the same middle name. She and I even happened to live in the same city, at the same time, about 10 years ago.

Georgia Girl:
Just this past weekend he flew in and we spent the holiday together...I can only describe it as suddenly feeling complete.

Savant73:
It just struck me as amazing, how regardless of all the assorted differences we have, none of them mattered in the least. Underneath all the superficial junk that people put so much stock in during their day to day lives, we each knew that we matched perfectly. Cars, clothes, jobs, music, hobbies, lifestyles, etc....all of it was an entirely moot point. The only thing that mattered, was that we were two people that fit each other perfectly, and loved each other endlessly.

Georgia Girl:
We are planning to get together again next month and taking things a day at a time. As for our future, we have no doubt that we will be together, we just can't decide where.

I hope sharing this helps any others who are involved in LDR's as
well as relationships which have what convention would consider and age barrier.

Please feel free to ask any questions and I will try to help as best
I can.

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Thanks Georgia and Savant

Thank you both for sharing your LDR experience. It seems fitting that your Thanksgiving holiday was spent together; you seem like a wonderful couple and I wish you the best.

"Feeling complete" touches a cord with me already. Each day already feels "whole" for me just by saying goodnight to Oman. He has already filled in some empty spots my heart had available. The hardest part right now for me is the waiting and trying NOT to anticipate anything regarding our first face-to-face meeting. Hope we'll be as fortunate as you two.

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Reached 100 posts!!

Just wanted my official milestone to be with a reply on this LDR thread!

Thanks for all who have contributed!!

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Yay MM/Destiny!

Well, it was nice to know another online couple got to meet offline (lisa/gang aka MM and Destiny). It was a wonderful ceremony, and I certainly wish you the best!

Meanwhile, February cannot come soon enough for me!

 

[Spanktress]

I think by my being a member of a chat/meeting site that had a lot of wannbes, hackers, pretenders & dishonest people that frequent it - I've become very aloof & guarded. Also developed a somewhat negative attitude about being 'your true self' with people online & therefor developing a relationship online that will continue to be successful in real time, I see as impossible.

Within my first few hours of being on Lit I could sense the genuiness, honesty & friendliness of most ,almost all, its members, authors, contributors & chatters.

To hear of a story such as yours & others that have posted on this thread with a positive , happy, heart warming outcome it makes me sit back & think - that I should change my approach to Lit & to also slowly re-open my mind to the possibility of things which I've closed off, disregarded or ignored by being at"that other site"

Always cheering for Jenny & Oman

*~* Spanks *~*

 

[mountainhigh]

Long distance relationships definitely can work and be very positive. My wife and I lived on opposite coasts for the first year of our relationship, seeing each other for a weekend every couple of months and building a solid friendship over the phone evenings in between. Long distance forces you to develop free, consisistent, and honest communication within your relationship and it forces you to seek and actively maintain balance in your life away from your relationship--both things that often get overlooked when your partner is right next to you all of the time. Don't get me wrong: long distance relationships definitely take a lot of patience, work, and commitment, but when there is a forseeable end to the distance, the time in between can be both positive and rewarding. Good luck!

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Thanks Spanks

Always cheering for Jenny & Oman

*~* Spanks *~*

I have not spent time at other sites, but there is indeed a community feeling here at Lit which I had never expected.

I'm happy you're softening up, although our guards should continue to be on duty (but without a rifle)!

Glad to have met you!

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Thanks mountainhigh

Long distance relationships definitely can work and be very positive. My wife and I lived on opposite coasts for the first year of our relationship, seeing each other for a weekend every couple of months and building a solid friendship over the phone evenings in between. Long distance forces you to develop free, consisistent, and honest communication within your relationship and it forces you to seek and actively maintain balance in your life away from your relationship--both things that often get overlooked when your partner is right next to you all of the time. Don't get me wrong: long distance relationships definitely take a lot of patience, work, and commitment, but when there is a forseeable end to the distance, the time in between can be both positive and rewarding. Good luck!

Very encouraging words and I'm pleased you posted your first note on here! Did you and your wife meet in person initially, or online?

Your words exactly portray our relationship these last months, and we have even developed a "sixth sense" regarding each other. We are headed for a February meeting; thanks for your good wishes.

 

[Dr S Crow]

Be close, and be honest. Let it take its own course without pushing it. These can actually offer you more than a face to face relationship because you will be more open. If you do eventually meet, and never rush the meeting, you will know more about the person than you would ever have imagined, without the superficial getting in the way.

I cannot stress honesty enough. If you lose that, you will never make it.

***
And I second that. And I know what I am talking about as I met my wife over internet (not on a list like this... nothing to do with sex at all-just a chance meeting of soulmates.)

We communicated (email, AIM, ICQ, phone) for 8 months before I flew for 9 hours to meet her. We spent 3 wonderful weeks together - met her son and friends and we had great, uninhibited sex.

We were always honest in our communications, be it about sexual fantasies or the fact that we felt grumpy and wanted to watch the telly a while.

This honesty creates trust and love thrives on trust.
At many levels.

Be True.
Enjoy.
Tell all.

Love

Dr S Crow
commontongue@yahoo.fr

 

[amnotamouse]

it can work...wait! it is working!!!

I'm on my third long distance relationship in two years. You would think that after the first, I'd have learned my lesson. It broke down for all the reasons everyone has mentioned. Not two months later, I did it again, this time with someone quite a bit further away. Same results. I was convinced that LTR could not work.

Cut ahead to today. I met this wonderful woman online 9 months ago. I thought at first she was only 30 miles away. She is 6,840 miles away!!! I've chatted with her everyday. I now talk to her everynight, (even w/ a 6 hour difference), and ...drum roll...we are getting married in 6 months, and she'll move here, and then, we're moving overseas...

So, to everyone out there. It takes work to find the right person, no matter where they live. It takes work to make any relationship work. BUT when you find the right person, you will know, as I do, you would have it no other way....

ps. you learn to be very creative in your writings, and you would be amazed at how intimate you can be on the phone....

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Honesty and Patience

Thank you Dr S Crowe and amnotamouse for sharing your experiences and boosting my spirits!

Honesty is most important and we have already shared a lot of ourselves with each other, and I feel like I've known him my whole life.

Wishing you both continued happiness with your relationships!

Is it February yet?

 

[JennyOmanHill]

testing

 

[lion_lioness]

It can work..

My wife and I met online in a chat room in 1996. It started slowly with casual chat which after several months led to a first nervous phone call. You bet the phone is expensive. Back then the long distance deals weren't available to us. Some nights we would talk for 5 or 6 hours at a time. But after a year we finally met in person. She lived about 1000 miles away, so we depended alot on the computer to communicate. You are lucky today though, it is now possible to talk with phone clarity using your computer(WiFi technology) for the same cost as your internet connection. And the video option is there too for you today.
Yes phone sex is great when it's your only option. You really can open up and get to know the "true" person within. We eventually got together permanently, got married and have a child. We're happy and owe our happiness to our chance meeting and long distance relationship the internet gave us. Trust is a must when you are appart.

Good luck.

Lion

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Re: It can work..

My wife and I met online in a chat room in 1996. It started slowly with casual chat which after several months led to a first nervous phone call....
Yes phone sex is great when it's your only option. You really can open up and get to know the "true" person within. We eventually got together permanently, got married and have a child. We're happy and owe our happiness to our chance meeting and long distance relationship the internet gave us. Trust is a must when you are appart.
Good luck.
Lion

Thank you for your encouraging words! And best wishes to you and your family. (Are you anywhere near Brandon?)

We are looking into the real chat options on the PC as well. I'm so new to the chat scene, but so glad that this has happened.

Trust and honesty (and some patience) are the keys to any LDR I think!

 

[Somme]

just keep going, jenny....we're behind you both...

 

[ShamelessFlirt]

behind you

just keep going, jenny....we're behind you both...

We're ALL behind you! And it's not just because of the view!!

(Do we feel like we're behind you because of your avitar??)

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Thanks so much for your support and encouragement, Somme and Shameless! (Avitar indeed!! Remember it's me AND Oman... make sure you're admiring the right one!)

 

[ShamelessFlirt]

Which one?

Thanks so much for your support and encouragement, Somme and Shameless! (Avitar indeed!! Remember it's me AND Oman... make sure you're admiring the right one!)

It's the year 2001 AND I live in New York.

Which is which??

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Sunday nite blues...

Well, it's holiday time. I'm having a great deal of difficulty locating a new job for myself. Oman is overly busy now, and needs a lot of "rest" since his work week has now extended to 6 days of constant traveling and running around.

So it's 10:30pm on a Sunday night and I'm feeling blue. Has this happened to any of the other LDR's out there? I don't have the funds to go out, and I'm not ready to fall asleep, so I'm sending out emails and reading Lit and posting.

There, I already feel a little better now!

 

[Aileena_Sylvan]

Long Distance Relationships-- thumbs up

About 3.5yrs ago, I responded to a sweet sounding internet personal ad from a gentleman, not knowing where he lived or how old he was, knowing only that the words he'd written and honesty that came thru his post touched me somehow. He replied and we began a relationship .. first over the net / phone for about a month and a half before meeting...then, in real life ever since. We live an hour and a half apart, which may not seem like a terrible distance for some, but for us it means we only see each other on weekends and holidays or special occasions... which really sucks, hehehe. But, we've found that honesty, communication on a regular basis really helps to bridge whatever gaps that the time and space throws between us. I once thought that I'd NEVER use the net to meet someone in the romantic sense, as my parents always preached that "only psychos and perverts" utilized the net searching for victims.... heheh I am glad to say I've proven them 100% wrong.. at least in my case.

Best of luck.. and no matter what you and he do, be honest, be caring and always look for the positives, even when it seems that too many things conspire against you both .... /hug

-Gabrielle