My Safe Place Thread

We have decided that the greatest invention ever is the Norpro Deluxe Cherry Pitter.

Take that sliced bread, steam engine, automobile, stirrup, and single cup coffee maker. Take a powder you flush loo and rolled paper fans. The Norpro Deluxe is the best.

A person can eat up to 875 cherries picked directly from a tree before collapsing with a stomach ache and/or pure (or impure) ecstasy.
 
We have decided that the greatest invention ever is the Norpro Deluxe Cherry Pitter.

Take that sliced bread, steam engine, automobile, stirrup, and single cup coffee maker. Take a powder you flush loo and rolled paper fans. The Norpro Deluxe is the best.

A person can eat up to 875 cherries picked directly from a tree before collapsing with a stomach ache and/or pure (or impure) ecstasy.

This is why the cherry pits should be expelled from the consumer's mouth with a sharp blast of wind. And perhaps, a target should be set up so that the expellor will gain accuracy with practice. This little game might slow things down long enough for the consumer to break the 1000 cherries eaten mark!
 
We have decided that the greatest invention ever is the Norpro Deluxe Cherry Pitter.

Take that sliced bread, steam engine, automobile, stirrup, and single cup coffee maker. Take a powder you flush loo and rolled paper fans. The Norpro Deluxe is the best.

A person can eat up to 875 cherries picked directly from a tree before collapsing with a stomach ache and/or pure (or impure) ecstasy.

I do very much enjoy a good fresh cherry, or 875. I have always regarded them as my favourite fruit, though alas I have no cherry orchards from which to pick them. A most unfortunate, and pitiable, turn of events.

This is why the cherry pits should be expelled from the consumer's mouth with a sharp blast of wind. And perhaps, a target should be set up so that the expellor will gain accuracy with practice.

Barbarous.
 
I do very much enjoy a good fresh cherry, or 875. I have always regarded them as my favourite fruit, though alas I have no cherry orchards from which to pick them. A most unfortunate, and pitiable, turn of events.

Barbarous.

I do have a cherry orchard. Of the twelve trees, 8 are producing this year, the others did not flower and thus are barren. I stood under and in and around the largest producers, a Bing and a Jubilee and ate cherries until I was more than adequately filled. The rest of the produce, we picked and pitted for various cherry products. I love cherry based alliteration almost as much as I love the cherries.

I agree, pit spitters should probably be banned from this safe place, but as it is Thor, I will give him another chance; he seems to be a decent sort of barbarian.
 
We have decided that the greatest invention ever is the Norpro Deluxe Cherry Pitter.

Take that sliced bread, steam engine, automobile, stirrup, and single cup coffee maker. Take a powder you flush loo and rolled paper fans. The Norpro Deluxe is the best.

A person can eat up to 875 cherries picked directly from a tree before collapsing with a stomach ache and/or pure (or impure) ecstasy.



Nothing brightens my day like droll hyperbole.




 
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I do have a cherry orchard. Of the twelve trees, 8 are producing this year, the others did not flower and thus are barren. I stood under and in and around the largest producers, a Bing and a Jubilee and ate cherries until I was more than adequately filled. The rest of the produce, we picked and pitted for various cherry products. I love cherry based alliteration almost as much as I love the cherries.

I agree, pit spitters should probably be banned from this safe place, but as it is Thor, I will give him another chance; he seems to be a decent sort of barbarian.

How do you keep the birds away?
 
Cherries are delicacy up here. We seldom get good cherries. And, a great cherry is extremely rare.

Don't get me started on peaches.
 
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Word Of The Day

ataraxy
(also ataraxia)



n., A state of serene calmness.

Origin: Early 17th century: from French ataraxie, from Greek ataraxia ‘impassiveness’, from a- ‘not’ + tarassein ‘disturb’.




 
It appears that this will be a good fruit year all around. Cherries overproduced, giving me several 3 gallon buckets of fruit. Apples are growing fast and heavy and the trees are loaded enough that I will have to thin to protect branches. Pears are OK to good and if I can protect them from the assorted ants, beetle, and birds, I should have a plum crop in two months. Strawberries are fair to good, but ever so tasty.
 
*sigh*

another fool who apparently cannot read thread guidelines.

oh well. iggy.
 
Never go full Vetteman.

I assumed that you were channeling him with the boobs request.

He is back, hiding under an alt that has not yet used the words pusillanimous or benighted.

You should talk to him, like minds and all.
 
It appears that this will be a good fruit year all around. Cherries overproduced, giving me several 3 gallon buckets of fruit. Apples are growing fast and heavy and the trees are loaded enough that I will have to thin to protect branches. Pears are OK to good and if I can protect them from the assorted ants, beetle, and birds, I should have a plum crop in two months. Strawberries are fair to good, but ever so tasty.

Fuck me. It's like reading Goblin Market.
 
Fuck me. It's like reading Goblin Market.

I apologise for the unexciting reports from my now unexciting life. I am not working, both kids are busy with sports and pony club, and I other than walking hounds (probably would not flip your on switch) and my daily ride or two, I do little but walk among my trees and plants and kill the odd pest and attempt to devise a better way to eat my produce.

Being a house-mother is a hard life. I thought I might take in a movie later, but the sun beckons and I have no choice to answer.
 
I apologise for the unexciting reports from my now unexciting life. I am not working, both kids are busy with sports and pony club, and I other than walking hounds (probably would not flip your on switch) and my daily ride or two, I do little but walk among my trees and plants and kill the odd pest and attempt to devise a better way to eat my produce.

Being a house-mother is a hard life. I thought I might take in a movie later, but the sun beckons and I have no choice to answer.

This looks good on you, on so MANY levels...:devil:
 
I genuinely laughed out loud at that. There's a unfortunate dearth of Goblin Market jokes in this world.

You are both cunts.

My fruits are healthy, tasty, fresh, and you should come eat some. I promise no harm will come to you. I do not promise the same for the spawn of Ireland.
 
You are both cunts.

My fruits are healthy, tasty, fresh, and you should come eat some. I promise no harm will come to you. I do not promise the same for the spawn of Ireland.

True.

All ripe together in summer weather no doubt.

How far removed does one have to be to not be considered spawn?
 
True.

All ripe together in summer weather no doubt.

How far removed does one have to be to not be considered spawn?

I live with one and her get, so there is some leeway. It all depends on the weather, time of day, week, month and whether or not you complain about the mattress.
 
I live with one and her get, so there is some leeway. It all depends on the weather, time of day, week, month and whether or not you complain about the mattress.

Of course. It would be ridiculous to suppose that something could be the same on a Tuesday—a Tuesday—as on a Friday. The height of nonsense. Things are clearly going to be different.

But I do happen to have a rather uncomfortable mattress.
 
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