Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[hairball18]

I am absolutely charming.

 

[LeBaronSamedi]

Someday, I want to find a nice, modest wife and settle down.

 

[~Elizabeth~]

I absolutely do not enjoy nipple clamps, damn it.

 

[Shymidwestgirl]

My favorite thing to do is clean house on the weekend.

 

[Deleted member 6808749]

I am stable, happy and have an enormous knob.

 

[HollyS]

I absolutely do not enjoy nipple clamps, damn it.

I, too, hate the feel of nipple clamps.

 

[MindYaBitness]

I, too, hate the feel of nipple clamps.

Indeed, nipple clamps are the worst and I have no idea who ordered all these breast play toys. They just showed up on my doorstep, I swear!

 

[Strixaluco]

You all could send the nipple clamps that you don't use, to me! I'd wear them day and night!

 

[HollyS]

The only things I hate worse than nipple clamps are butt plugs.

 

[ImpishSeraph]

When it gets too hot, I turn my sprinklers on, strip naked, and run around in my yard

 

[~Elizabeth~]

The only things I hate worse than nipple clamps are butt plugs.

Oh god yes, they are horrible to wear.

 

[LeBaronSamedi]

When it gets too hot, I turn my sprinklers on, strip naked, and run around in my yard

That's not a lie, is it?

 

[MisterChillax]

I have evidence that aliens are the rulers of planet earth.

 

[~Elizabeth~]

I believe alien invasion is possible someday.

 

[Strixaluco]

Oh god yes, they are horrible to wear.

Indeed, even I can't stand them.

 

[ImpishSeraph]

That's not a lie, is it?

It is for the yard I have now. Not for my old yard in Tampa

 

[Deleted member 6808749]

I have all of the sex, all of the time.

 

[~Elizabeth~]

I have all of the sex, all of the time.

Damn, you’re lucky like that too?

 

[Taegul]

When it gets too hot, I turn my sprinklers on, strip naked, and run around in my yard

Do that in my yard and I will instantly turn into angry grandpa.

"Damn whippersnappers! GET OFF MY LAWN!"

 

[ImThe3rdWheel]

I have all of the sex, all of the time.

So that’s why I get none.

 

[barefootgirl69]

I have all of the sex, all of the time.

So THAT'S where it went!

*runs back to OC, laughing*

 

[Deleted member 6808749]

So that’s why I get none.

Sorry my friend. You're on the rota for next week.

 

[luv2custrip]

I can’t stand looking at naked women anymore!

 

[~Elizabeth~]

I masturbate way too fucking much. It’s got to stop.

 

[HollyS]

I never masturbate. I keep thinking I should try it sometime.