Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[Jodaily]

I just love squirrels in my garden!

 

[EctoJohn]

I can speak to animals. Most of them are speciist against humans.

 

[Jodaily]

I really don’t care much for my fellow Litsters

 

[Jodaily]

I can walk a straight line, even after going out for mex food

 

[lil_jenni]

I wish I'd had triplets or quadruplets instead of twins. More babies are always better. But I'm happy it was at least twins, because I'd be bored out of my fucking mind with just one baby to deal with.

 

[Pad_Foot]

I do not have the standard Lit issued 10 inch cock with a 1 inch radius

 

[Jodaily]

I am an uncies monkle

 

[Cwtchseeker]

I don’t like travelling anywhere

 

[QwertyMaster]

I know exactly what I want

 

[AnomalyLady]

It does not sexually thrill me when someone texts, “I will be 30 minutes late,” when I will be 15 minutes late.

 

[CuyValDar]

I’m the anonymous person behind 73% of Wikipedia’s conspiracy theory edits.

I disagree, I'm fairly certain 40% of them are mine.

 

[AnomalyLady]

I love my “friend” telling me to take a bath because he knows that’s where 70% of my sexy videos come from

 

[LostHorizon]

I am very happy that the chopper is fixed this week. Driving out to the Hamptons house is such a drag this time of year.

 

[Strixaluco]

I've decided to ditch my historical sewing projects.

 

[hairball18]

I am entirely satisfied with my life right now

 

[Taegul]

I can solve a Rubik's Cube with just my penis in under a minute. If there's one thing my penis is known for, it's finishing fast!

 

[Jodaily]

I have one of the neatest, most organized offices in the world.

 

[EctoJohn]

I was actually a background extra in Ghostbusters 2 as a child.

 

[Taegul]

I'm a professional magician. My best trick is making a woman's clothes disappear.

 

[QwertyMaster]

I spent seven years in the Himalayas developing psychic powers

 

[SimonSex]

My manservant’s name is Trevor

 

[EctoJohn]

I have the only box of crayons in the world with a pure gold crayon.

 

[barefootgirl69]

My last job was as a cat herder at a rocking chair convention.

 

[Jodaily]

I ran with the bulls in Pamplona

 

[Cindy027]

Unlike @Lord Pmann I am the darling of lit.