What Are You Nosey About Today?? 🦝

[ydahecnot]

I was being a wee bit sarcastic which perhaps doesn’t translate so well. I’m pretty well aware Neon’s not a woman - we’ve known each other a long time one one level or another.

Damn, I was about to like where this is going

 

[Silk_Princess]

I am nosey about what prompts certain (straight, cis) men to use photos of women as their avatars, and whether other women find this appealing. I don't recall seeing any/many female posters using photos of men as their AVs, so am genuinely curious about the thinking behind this.

We've talked about a couple of examples above (NeonSubtlety and Ydahecnot) where guys have selected avatars that unintentionally read as "female" to other posters. This is an interesting topic of its own; however, what I'm really curious about is the thinking of guys who choose an avatar that is unambiguously a photograph of a woman, or a female body part, and how others react to this.

Here's how my mind own works: if I see an AV that is a photo of a woman's body, or say, a woman's backside in pretty lingerie, my first assumption is usually that it is a female poster. When I see something in the person's written response that indicates otherwise, and if the photo appears to be an amateur one, I then wonder -- is this a photo of the poster's wife or girlfriend? If so, is he trying to convey that he is besotted with this person? Or is this like a trophy photo of some sort? Alternatively, if it is a professional photo, then he seems to be indicating that at a minimum that he likes this type of female body/backside. Is he perhaps also intending to convey that this is his ideal female body/backside, and others are not of interest?

And if by this point I haven't stopped thinking about the matter altogether, my reaction as a (straight, cis) woman is that none of these explanations is particularly appealing to me, and most would (at least initially dissuade) me from initiating any contact with him. Is that the intent of selecting such an AV? Or is my reaction unique? I am nosey as to what others think!

 

[Dribble]

I assume all posters are men anymore. Since the ratio of men to women here is easily 9 to 1...I am right 90% of the time. Fuck i am good.

 

[AveryElle]

I’m nosey about whether you still keep track of the number of sexual partners you’ve had? If you do, do you include online only partners? Do you think the number of partners matters?

 

[SassySheDevil]

We've talked about a couple of examples above (NeonSubtlety and Ydahecnot) where guys have selected avatars that unintentionally read as "female" to other posters. This is an interesting topic of its own; however, what I'm really curious about is the thinking of guys who choose an avatar that is unambiguously a photograph of a woman, or a female body part, and how others react to this.

Here's how my mind own works: if I see an AV that is a photo of a woman's body, or say, a woman's backside in pretty lingerie, my first assumption is usually that it is a female poster. When I see something in the person's written response that indicates otherwise, and if the photo appears to be an amateur one, I then wonder -- is this a photo of the poster's wife or girlfriend? If so, is he trying to convey that he is besotted with this person? Or is this like a trophy photo of some sort? Alternatively, if it is a professional photo, then he seems to be indicating that at a minimum that he likes this type of female body/backside. Is he perhaps also intending to convey that this is his ideal female body/backside, and others are not of interest?

And if by this point I haven't stopped thinking about the matter altogether, my reaction as a (straight, cis) woman is that none of these explanations is particularly appealing to me, and most would (at least initially dissuade) me from initiating any contact with him. Is that the intent of selecting such an AV? Or is my reaction unique? I am nosey as to what others think!

No. Honestly, this is what I think also.

 

[Orchidea73]

Is that the intent of selecting such an AV? Or is my reaction unique? I am nosey as to what others think!

I personally just think they like the picture for whatever reason (lights, colours, composition etc.), and that is all.

 

[Fingerfuxs]

We've talked about a couple of examples above (NeonSubtlety and Ydahecnot) where guys have selected avatars that unintentionally read as "female" to other posters. This is an interesting topic of its own; however, what I'm really curious about is the thinking of guys who choose an avatar that is unambiguously a photograph of a woman, or a female body part, and how others react to this.

Here's how my mind own works: if I see an AV that is a photo of a woman's body, or say, a woman's backside in pretty lingerie, my first assumption is usually that it is a female poster. When I see something in the person's written response that indicates otherwise, and if the photo appears to be an amateur one, I then wonder -- is this a photo of the poster's wife or girlfriend? If so, is he trying to convey that he is besotted with this person? Or is this like a trophy photo of some sort? Alternatively, if it is a professional photo, then he seems to be indicating that at a minimum that he likes this type of female body/backside. Is he perhaps also intending to convey that this is his ideal female body/backside, and others are not of interest?

And if by this point I haven't stopped thinking about the matter altogether, my reaction as a (straight, cis) woman is that none of these explanations is particularly appealing to me, and most would (at least initially dissuade) me from initiating any contact with him. Is that the intent of selecting such an AV? Or is my reaction unique? I am nosey as to what others think!

At best , to me the avatar is symbolism , nothing more nothing less. It’s the users mindset at that moment. Ours is a couples profile , thus I added her in our profile and signature for breast cancer awareness month. I use the signature in some posts and not in others. It’s a choice that we have here. You have to click on our profile or anyone else’s to see what the user chooses to put there.

The poster that you described as a type of Lit user. I’m more interested in why their avatar never changes then why they put whatever they have there in the first place. I find it intriguing that some have never had any other avatar after a very long time on Lit.

Are they that connected to it , are they OCD bound to it. Those types of questions run through my mind about avatars.

 

[Silk_Princess]

.
Thanks to everyone for the replies.

No. Honestly, this is what I think also.

Lol, great minds . . .

I personally just think they like the picture for whatever reason (lights, colours, composition etc.), and that is all.

Yes, I'm sure this is true in some cases -- sometimes a cigar is a just a cigar, etc. But I am intrigued by the fact that I don't think I've ever seen a woman use a similar photograph of a man in her avatar. So I still find the choice to be an interesting one.

At best , to me the avatar is symbolism , nothing more nothing less. It’s the users mindset at that moment. . . .

Agreed. And it's the mindset that leads to a male user to choose a woman's body as his symbol that I'm nosey about, lol . . .
.

 

[Orchidea73]

Yes, I'm sure this is true in some cases -- sometimes a cigar is a just a cigar, etc. But I am intrigued by the fact that I don't think I've ever seen a woman use a similar photograph of a man in her avatar. So I still find the choice to be an interesting one.

True that. Maybe we care more than they do about getting confused with a man?
Just guessing cause Idk really.

 

[ydahecnot]

I was told by someone I knew for years that our friendship was over because I’m friends with The Unabomber. The audacity of that alone makes me glad I don’t have to deal with that person anymore.
You know why I’m friends with The Unabomber? Because he never told me who I could be fucking friends with.
I stay away from folks that are friendly with the known creepers. It’s not difficult.

As the bestowed “Queen Bitch” of Lit, there are those that love me and those that don’t. Back atcha.

Crunchy peanut butter all the way, and I only buy Skippy. Sorry, Avery.

As for what makes a weekend great? Not having to run a memorial service is pretty high up there. This weekend sucked.
I would say, sunny days, some plans, but nothing major. Time with people I love. Time to be alone. Food.

The Unabomber thing I don’t understand. He’s having fun with a character, and he does break character pretty often. I don’t know why he would infuriate. (I have a pretty good guess as to the subject of the falling-out) Then again, I don’t see why Pmann infuriates.

 

[AveryElle]

PMann is a PITA, and we have had our little tussles, but I do care about him, and would never stop talking to someone because they are friends with him, nor would he with me.
My avoidances are the creepers with the icky posts, and those they are friends with.

I’m really Beth. Are you ok with that???

 

[Paul_Chance]

I am nosey about what prompts certain (straight, cis) men to use photos of women as their avatars, and whether other women find this appealing. I don't recall seeing any/many female posters using photos of men as their AVs, so am genuinely curious about the thinking behind this.

In another place, I had a friend who always used a female avatar (usually anyone of the available anonymous "hot woman" pictures). I asked him about it one day and he said (paraphasing). "The one avatar I see consistently all the time is my own, so I figured I'd rather be looking at a hot woman".

 

[Silk_Princess]

In another place, I had a friend who always used a female avatar (usually anyone of the available anonymous "hot woman" pictures). I asked him about it one day and he said (paraphasing). "The one avatar I see consistently all the time is my own, so I figured I'd rather be looking at a hot woman".

Lol, your friend is a true pragmatist. Thank you for sharing!
.

 

[AveryElle]

Meaning? If someone asked me how many men I have fucked my number would reflect in the flesh AND cyber?
No. I don’t count online partners as sexual partners, even if we are sexual.

I meant, do people still keep track of the number of partner they have had? And do they include online partner in that?

I seriously can’t remember the number and I was reading something like asking whether keeping track is still a thing people do and it had me curious

 

[AlpineFresco]

Do I keep track of my number of partners?
I'm aware of how many, but that's because the number is low.

For people with higher numbers? It probably blurs at some point.

 

[Dribble]

I was asked once...why would I know? Not like I kept souvenirs. So I started counting and the only way I could do that was say names and place them in order. Next thing I knew she was screaming at me totally pissed off. Wtf? Guess she didn't like how I counted.

 

[Orchidea73]

I was asked once...why would I know? Not like I kept souvenirs. So I started counting and the only way I could do that was say names and place them in order. Next thing I knew she was screaming at me totally pissed off. Wtf? Guess she didn't like how I counted.

LMAO!

Ignorance is a bliss sometimes. I've learned time ago not to ask those questions, and neither talk about mine either.

 

[Dribble]

LMAO!

Ignorance is a bliss sometimes. I've learned time ago not to ask those questions, and neither talk about mine either.

Well...I did say I was relatively inexperienced first...kinda surprised me too

 

[Orchidea73]

Well...I did say I was relatively inexperienced first...kinda surprised me too

Generally speaking, we women are curious about it. We might not like the answer but we still would like to know. I can be still curious about it today, towards some people. I've just learned to bite my tongue.

 

[Paul_Chance]

That reminds me of the movie "Don Juan DeMarco" where the love of his life asked him how many partners he's had and goes "One...."

Pauses for a long breath and then goes "...thousand and nine". (I don't remember the exact number he gives).

The other alternative is just go "One...mumble, mumble, mumble"

 

[Orchidea73]

That reminds me of the movie "Don Juan DeMarco" where the love of his life asked him how many partners he's had and goes "One...."

Pauses for a long breath and then goes "...thousand and nine". (I don't remember the exact number he gives).

The other alternative is just go "One...mumble, mumble, mumble"

LOL

I've seen that movie once but I don't remember the scene.
I'm picturing it with Jonny Depp but as Jack Sparrow. That's something that Sparrow would say and do. Especially the "One...mumble, mumble, mumble"

 

[aussiegeekygal]

I’m surprised some weirdo hasn’t developed an app for it yet.

I present the Eskimo Brothers Database?

 

[Xerxes82]

I meant, do people still keep track of the number of partner they have had? And do they include online partner in that?

I seriously can’t remember the number and I was reading something like asking whether keeping track is still a thing people do and it had me curious

If I stopped and thought about it for a few minutes, I could probably do the number of actual in person, hands on women I've been with. I don't keep an active count in my head to quote off the top. I don't know why you would, that feels weird to me. But to each their own. I would never think to include online people in that number, that feels like a different question altogether to my mind.

Now, outside of that, I do sort of keep a record. Names. I can tell you I've slept with a Priscilla but never a Megan. It's not a number. It's not a trophy. It's a curio. I would love to tell you that I go out there and collect exotic names like Pokemon, but yeah, not my thing. It crosses my mind, for sure, but it doesn't actually impact my behavior. Does that make me weird? Yeah, very probably. Which I'm cool with. I wear weird well.

I would never ask anybody their number. And I only care if, as Rain noted, I would be the first. That changes the game considerably, both in terms of how I approach it and the actual act itself. Should that be the case? I don't know. But it does. Beyond that, the only relevant statistic to me is whether your number is going up by one with me in your bed. If we're on that same page, then we're good. I can be 2, or 20, or 1000. As long as your attention is on me in that moment, I've got no complaints.

 

[Silk_Princess]

I can be 2, or 20, or 1000. As long as your attention is on me in that moment, I've got no complaints.

This ^

 

[AmberLGreen]

I honestly don’t ask and don’t care about the answer to the how many people a person has slept with. I don’t feel like it has any relevance to the relationship that may occur between the person and I unless the answer is none. That is the only time I feel like I should be informed because care needs to be taken. I don’t want to be the woman that overwhelms a man on his first time and I could very easily be that woman. Jesus that would be devastating to me if I went in without that knowledge for a persons first time. I mean at my age I doubt that would ever happen but who knows it is my only caveat to that question.

For the record. I actually could not tell you the number if you did ask. I don’t count. I probably could if put my mind to it but I just don’t consider it important so I don’t track it.

I’m surprised some weirdo hasn’t developed an app for it yet.

Totally agree with this. A person’s past is their past. Knowing how many people they have slept with isn’t going to change whether you know or not.

However, if the sex was either really bad or totally mind-blowing, I might ask lol