where are all the bi or bicurious women?

[SnowWhiteQueen]

Hello Girls

I too love being with women and find it difficult to find someone "in real life". It seems like people aren't nearly as open about it as they are online. I guess I'm the same way too. I go to a local gay bar occasionally but I find myself sticking to my friends and not trying to meet anyone new. Does anyone else have this problem?? If anyone has any suggestions I'm sure I'm not the only one out there who would like to hear them.

 

[misspihla]

I go to a local gay bar occasionally but I find myself sticking to my friends and not trying to meet anyone new. Does anyone else have this problem?? If anyone has any suggestions I'm sure I'm not the only one out there who would like to hear them.

You go to local gay bar with your friends? Hmm..

I have only gone to one lesbian/trans place, and alone since I wouldnt want to drag my friends with there... and sitting alone I seem to get company always. However lesbian circles here are so small that everyone knows everyone and have slept with each other already. So I'm not that interested...

I think net in general is good place to find other people with same sexual preferences (assuming you are something else than vanilla hetero). But best place is not Lit or such big forum but small chat rooms of local magazine or local dating service etc.

 

[nici]

You go to local gay bar with your friends? Hmm..

I have only gone to one lesbian/trans place, and alone since I wouldnt want to drag my friends with there... and sitting alone I seem to get company always. However lesbian circles here are so small that everyone knows everyone and have slept with each other already. So I'm not that interested...

I think net in general is good place to find other people with same sexual preferences (assuming you are something else than vanilla hetero). But best place is not Lit or such big forum but small chat rooms of local magazine or local dating service etc.

ROFLMAO

Lez circles are always too small!

“OMG, did you see her? She is so hot and had my gaydar pinging off the wall.”

“Well, do you know anyone who has dated her?”

“Ummmm, well… no.”

“Then she’s not. Get a grip or go out and get laid. You’re way off.”

I’ll agree that the net is nice in finding like minded others, but I’ll disagree that the net is better for finding romance or relationships. Anyone I have found that I felt sympathetic towards has always been like thousands of miles away from me.

Lit is Lit, and about literature. Though possible to find someone sympathetic, I don’t feel it is probable.

 

[nici]

Hello Girls

I too love being with women and find it difficult to find someone "in real life". It seems like people aren't nearly as open about it as they are online. I guess I'm the same way too. I go to a local gay bar occasionally but I find myself sticking to my friends and not trying to meet anyone new. Does anyone else have this problem?? If anyone has any suggestions I'm sure I'm not the only one out there who would like to hear them.

Appendix III, Section IV, Paragraphs 29 through 431 of the Lesbian Scene and Behavioral Manual states clearly that hets in groups, visiting queer locals, are slumming and a waste of time. (Even if she’s hot, pinging your gaydar to the max, and just your type.)

If you really do want to “hook up” and meet someone, go alone. Then you’ll be “fresh meat” in a scene where everyone knows everyone and new and fresh is in high demand. Instead of being a buyer in a seller’s market, you’ll be a seller in a seller’s market.

 

[misspihla]

Ill agree that the net is nice in finding like minded others, but Ill disagree that the net is better for finding romance or relationships. Anyone I have found that I felt sympathetic towards has always been like thousands of miles away from me.

Thats why i suggested local magazine/organization chat rooms or localized dating services. In big international places its total lottery to find anyone nice nearby. Better to check those who are nearby I know people have had success with distance dating but its not a thing for me.

 

[Alexandra1979]

Well, the Net worked for me, but not in a bi context.

 

[muskokan]

I guess I'd have to place myself in the bi-curious category though I know I am very attracted to women I have not yet had the opportunity to act on that attraction, much to my dismay!

 

[mssweetangelina]

I'd throw myself into this category as well.....

 

[Javagirl]

thanks for everyone's great comments and feedback

Hi, sorry I've been away--didn't mean to abandon my own thread I started.

Nici, you've brought up a LOT of great points and I really appreciate your feedback. I appreciate everyone's feedback and support on here and I think this is turning into an interesting thread.

I really enjoy hearing everyone's personal experiences and comments/stories.

As for me...I think I'm in the confused category. This is all very new to me...being attracted to women and acting upon it. I've had a few sexual experiences with women in the past year but my first experience wasn't great. The other experience was with someone who's married and she has her own issues she's dealing with right now, so that was a fleeting encounter, I guess you could say.

I've met women online (and then met them in real time) and to be honest, it was disappointing. I guess I thought women in general would be more understanding and sympathetic and I ended up meeting the baggage-ridden, selfish, into themselves/into their looks/vain women. I love meeting new people so for me, it was a chance to gain a new friend with the possibility for more--and if it was just friends, that was cool as well. I didn't go into meeting these women with the mindset, oh yeah, I'm going to have my first bi experience with a woman tonighttttt ha!

It's difficult to meet local women (I live in a fairly metropolitan area) but I still find it difficult to meet real, genuine women (just like it is difficult for me to real, genuine men these days as well ha!!) It's just tough dating period!! I'm single and almost 35 so the dating pool seems crazy or non-existent.

Anyway, I appreciate everyone's feedback and support and feel free to PM and say hi

Nici, I appreciate all the info. on here about the Kinsey study. I've read that before in my psych classes and found it really interesting--thanks for sharing

Hugs!
Javagirl

 

[muskokan]

I think it is hard to meet women, i've been looking for a couple years (though not too hard) and have come up empty.

I'm also looking for a "friends and possibly more" situation for now and seeing where it goes from there, a little explorations etc.

 

[misspihla]

The girl I'm dating now (meeting tomorrow again ) I found in local online dating service. I was looking for a "rough and dominant girl for short thing or more" (to put it in one line). And she answered. And rest is history

I have a double problem in being bisexual and into bdsm. Sometimes it feels that finding a really compatible partner requires net...

But luckily neither is a matter of life or death for me. I'm ready to give up a lot for love.

 

[YummyDakota]

Hello Ladies I just came across the thread yall have going here and just wanted to stop bye and Tell everyone hello and introduce myself my name is Dakota. Ive been on lit for a while now i never posted until recently and i have always found it really hard to meet and talk to other bi and bicourious women so Iam really looking forward to possibly talking more often with some of yall ladies one day!
XOXO
dakota

 

[yeehawchick1]

Im bi but havent had the chance to really do nething about it quite yet. Any hints?

 

[Bandit58]

The girl I'm dating now (meeting tomorrow again ) I found in local online dating service. I was looking for a "rough and dominant girl for short thing or more" (to put it in one line). And she answered. And rest is history

I have a double problem in being bisexual and into bdsm. Sometimes it feels that finding a really compatible partner requires net...

But luckily neither is a matter of life or death for me. I'm ready to give up a lot for love.

I am both bisexual and a sub However I have a Husband/Dom so I get all the BDSM I need at home. My current female play partner is vanilla, I do enjoy cuddling, kissing and gentle lovemaking with her.

I have combined the two (BDSM and bisexuality) before and enjoyed being Topped by both my husband and fem partner.

Now that I think about it, I met all these people on the internet too!

 

[Bandit58]

Im bi but havent had the chance to really do nething about it quite yet. Any hints?

Try joining a personals site like AdultMatchMaker or FriendFinder. That's where I found a couple of nice ladies. However be prepared for bullshit artists, bicurious ones who chicken out at the last minute and males pretending to be females

 

[AussieAngel]

Try joining a personals site like AdultMatchMaker or FriendFinder. That's where I found a couple of nice ladies. However be prepared for bullshit artists, bicurious ones who chicken out at the last minute and males pretending to be females

Hey bandit.

did you have luck in aus using AdultMatchMaker and other such sites? i dont know if i have the guts for that. i know what i want.. i just cant find it.

 

[Bandit58]

Hey bandit.

did you have luck in aus using AdultMatchMaker and other such sites? i dont know if i have the guts for that. i know what i want.. i just cant find it.

I found a couple of nice ladies on AdultMatchMaker (including my current play partner) but went through heaps of bullshit as well. I was a member for over two years, my profile stated clearly that I was only looking for women but I would constantly get messages/winks from men who obviously can't read.

I even tried LesbianMatchMaker but the site admins wouldn't approve my profile which stated that I had a male partner, even though I also said he wouldn't be involved.

I'm happy seeing my current play partner a couple of times a month and so I've turned off/deleted my profile now.

Some of my difficulties in meeting people also stem from the fact that my husband has health issues and he comes first, so I'm not able to just drop everything and go meet people

 

[YummyDakota]

how is everyone tonight?
Dakota

 

[Javagirl]

hi again

HI Dakota, thanks for stopping by...have seen your pics before

I think it's just difficult MEETING normal people period online--I've had crazy experiences with both men and women (one guy in particular I met on here went pretty crazy/jealous on me, so I think I've given up on meeting sane men online ha! If you know any single sane men or women in their 30s, please send them my way!)

I appreciate everyone's comments and Muskokan, we should chat more hon Sounds like we're in the same boat!

JGirlie

 

[nici]

Hey bandit.

did you have luck in aus using AdultMatchMaker and other such sites? i dont know if i have the guts for that. i know what i want.. i just cant find it.

I've never done the AMM thingie, but I have met someone from online.

It was from a lez chat site and we chatted on the site for I don't know how long before the butterflys start tickling each of our stomachs, and we knew we had to meet.

It must have taken then another half year of telephoning and chatting privately online, before I couldn't take it anymore and got on a plane.

The meeting was really surreal, melodramatic and soooo romantic! We both stared at each other for minutes, each with a rose in hand, almost crying before we even approached each other.

The weekend seened only to last minutes, and I think I cried the whole plane trip back.

I don't know if I could go through something like that again.

Online, you can fall so deeply in love and even though you know it cannot go anywhere, it gets to be an obsession. At times, I felt like a masochist.

 

[godizpunishingme]

hey ladies,

hows everyone tonite??

 

[AussieAngel]

I've never done the AMM thingie, but I have met someone from online.

It was from a lez chat site and we chatted on the site for I don't know how long before the butterflys start tickling each of our stomachs, and we knew we had to meet.

It must have taken then another half year of telephoning and chatting privately online, before I couldn't take it anymore and got on a plane.

The meeting was really surreal, melodramatic and soooo romantic! We both stared at each other for minutes, each with a rose in hand, almost crying before we even approached each other.

The weekend seened only to last minutes, and I think I cried the whole plane trip back.

I don't know if I could go through something like that again.

Online, you can fall so deeply in love and even though you know it cannot go anywhere, it gets to be an obsession. At times, I felt like a masochist.

Wow. I wish..


And thanks bandit. i think i am gonna check it out

 

[cat_h20]

i'l jump in...admitting to myself that iwanted to explore sexually was more important than coming up with a title for myself (bi/straight ) , and it basically covers everything... much freer and more relaxed

 

[mother_in_law]

Hi all

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wanted 21-29 bi girl, petite and feminine.
We are a couple of bi females who are having a relationship. We are in our mid fifties but you would not guess it. I am widowed and my girlfriend is divorced. Looking for a young woman that would love to go to dinner and dancing and come home with us on weekends. If interesred contact me.
__________________

 

[inmyanonymity]

this is a great thread...

my husband found it for me and it was fun to read.

i was feeling alone about my sudden desire to taste and play with a woman when i'd always stuck to men, but i don't feel alone any more. and knowing there are all these hot ladies out there who feel like i do, well, that's just fuel for my current fantasies. mmm.