Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because...

[Grey_Mouse]

Because!? Wait...you guys get a reason?

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I ate at Taco Bell today. Gimme about a week and I'll be a sexual Tyrannosaurus again.

 

[_valkyrie_]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I bought new bedding and I must be absolutely sure prior usage that the thread count on the sheets goes up to 600.

 

[VoraciousValue]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I'm celebrating the birthday of Pope Urban II.

 

[_valkyrie_]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I am on a mission to find who actually let the dogs out. Might take a while.

 

[_valkyrie_]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I volunteered for the 'Manipedis for Millipedes Marathon', a charity fundraising event.

 

[StillRain]

I’ll probably fall asleep on the couch again and you’ll probably be working.

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I'm knitting my penis Christmas sweater tonight.

 

[jason28053]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I'm knitting my penis Christmas sweater tonight.

Make it a woody hoody

 

[VoraciousValue]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because seeing you fuck that other guy made my dick go really soft.

 

[desire30]

WE can't have sex tonight because Bond, James Bond call and needs a new Bond Girl

 

[RickTango]

WE can't have sex tonight because Bond, James Bond call and needs a new Bond Girl

Just call me James..

 

[Booboobear84]

WE can't have sex tonight because Bond, James Bond call and needs a new Bond Girl

You know that doesn't usually end well for the Bond Girl.

 

[The_gladiator]

Sorry darling, we can’t have sex tonight because the aliens said they’d take me away tonight.

 

[SlyderInside]

…because you’re waaaaaaaaaay over there and I’m still at the bar.

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I just found out that Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker's father and I am DONE.

I never saw that one coming!

Oh, sorry. I forgot to say, "spoiler alert". My bad.

 

[Azuldrgon]

Sorry, darling. We can't have sex tonight because we haven't figured out how to be able to get busy without you distracting me with conversations about topics I know nothing about which make my dick go soft every time you drone on and on about them.

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I mistakenly thought the Super Bowl was today and invited all my friends over for a Taylor Swift watch party. My bad.

 

[AWonkyDonkey]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I tripped and ended up sticking my cock in a food processor.

 

[RachelPost]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I have bad breath, a std, have to balance my checkbook, my favorite tv show is on, the sheets are in the wash, let's see...what other excuse can I come up with.

 

[abvt75]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I have bad breath, a std, have to balance my checkbook, my favorite tv show is on, the sheets are in the wash, let's see...what other excuse can I come up with.

@RachelPost

I am cold
I am tired

 

[sallysparrow23]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I just started my dick fast.

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I just started my dick fast.

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because seeing sallysparrows post with the words "dick" and "fast" together triggered my performance anxiety and I don't think I can perform.

Choose your words more carefully, please!

 

[Kat73]

Sorry dear, we can't have sex tonight because I'm just not interested.

 

[XShadynzX]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because.. oh fuck it...