Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because...

[TallGlassOfSarcasm]

Completely plausible.

Sex will come and go. But Battlebots.... that chance to see if Witch Doctor can finally win the giant nut....that comes along once, maybe twice in a lifetime.

 

[jarigi]

Because....well....we're sharing this little tent with your parents.

 

[English_guy_bkk]

Sorry darling we can't sex...have you heard from your Aunt today?

 

[_valkyrie_]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because someone has to pipe the muffins.

 

[base10]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because there is a Jurassic Park marathon on tonight and I need to take it all in.

What??? The scene where the T-Rex eats the goat gets my horny every time. Great movie to fuck to

 

[base10]

Nah, it's all about Jeff Goldblum and his half open shirt.

I think he got a lot of ladies interested after that.

He's a quirky guy, but a fantastic actor in the right role

 

[_valkyrie_]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because the tides off the coast of Malawi directly affect the price of the beetroots in Belize.

 

[Dalelaw2164]

… my dick flew off to Mallorca with a tawdry little number in hot pants and a belly shirt.

 

[_valkyrie_]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because the hobbits are being taken to Isengard.

 

[munch2much]

I’m sorry we can’t have sex tonight because if ever there was a wiz that is, that was the wiz that was.

 

[Dalelaw2164]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because the hobbits are being taken to Isengard.

Darling, I really don’t know why we need to involve them ALL the time… why are their huge, hairy…. Feet such a turn on for you anyway?!
Makes me feel so inadequate!
I mean, c’mon Arwen, can’t we just roleplay with Anduril like we used to…

 

[HornyJunkMail]

You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I forgot how. I need to watch a tutorial.

 

[GabbyDebarres]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because you turned me down last time when I wanted sex so turnabout is fair play don't you think?

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I got kicked by a horse and now my "boys" have swelled up to four times their normal size. Nah, I doubt you really want to see that...

 

[ashesatwork]

I have poison ivy

 

[RIPAphrodite]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because….I promised your dad we’d make you watch instead! ​

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because my Taegolo business is really taking off and I have to give some strange woman the best four minutes of her life on the other side of the country.

 

[_valkyrie_]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I have to keep watch over the sourdough.

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I thought the container of Ex Lax was candy. Gotta go!

 

[Crownvic]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I thought the container of Ex Lax was candy. Gotta go!

 

[Nightspeed]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I'm having a panic attack so bad it registers on the Richter scale and I'm hallucinating because of it.

....wait, we were supposed to just make something up...right?

 

[VoraciousValue]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because I'm still jerking off to the thought of getting Beetlejuiced by Lauren Boebert..

 

[Taegul]

Sorry darling, we can't have sex tonight because....because....

We can't have sex tonight because...

Did you have to wear that lingerie? Now I can't say no...

 

[Grey_Mouse]

Because!? Wait...you guys get a reason?