Things a mate should NEVER say to the One they are having sex with!

[Kat73]

Oh, I don't smoke...oops that's your cock.

Actually dated him is HS...

 

[EesomeBeastie]

You need to lay off the cake. It's like shagging a bloody whale!

 

[yeishia]

Did I tell you I forgot to take my pill this month?

 

[Kat73]

Is it supposed to be that color?

 

[dragonrazor]

"Why do you have stripes?"

 

[yeishia]

Pulls out the broken condom "I hope this was yours?"

 

[zydrate]

"Mmm, that was great Mike--I mean Joseph!!..."

 

[yeishia]

Did you remember to take your antibiotics love, the color is looking better I think. ?

 

[YourDemonLover]

Try squeezing harder swearheart!

 

[dragonrazor]

"do you want fries with that"

 

[YourDemonLover]

Wonders if you have every had sex?

 

[dragonrazor]

Wonders if you have every had sex?

Only once. Need a better experience....

 

[YourDemonLover]

I would say so...fries! *chuckles*

 

[dragonrazor]

I would say so...fries! *chuckles*

That was just my warped sense of humour.

 

[Trixabell]

Try squeezing harder swearheart!

On what?

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Heard the other day~(Not said to me...but overheard at a play date)

"You know, Miss, this just doesn't seem right. Shouldn't we be doing this the other way?"

My response? Lots of laughter...

(I was very glad I wasn't on the receiving end...the woman was SCARY good)

 

[dragonrazor]

Any sentence starting with "My mother told me" lol

 

[monique_minx]

Oh just fucking get hard already!

~ Seriously...alcohol affected males...jesus! ~

 

[Light Ice]

Only once. Need a better experience....

Be proud. That's one more time then everyone on the board expected.

 

[Trixabell]

Be proud. That's one more time then everyone on the board expected.

*spit take*

 

[dragonrazor]

*spit take*

I have to put up with that sort of thing from him a lot. After a while, most of what he says gets filtered out as spam.

 

[yeishia]

Do we have toooooooo?

 

[dragonrazor]

Monty Python's Spam Song (or alternatively, Every Sperm Is Sacred...if you know them, you get the joke. If not, you're probably better off.)

 

[yeishia]

Monty Python's Spam Song (or alternatively, Every Sperm Is Sacred...if you know them, you get the joke. If not, you're probably better off.)

What had that to do with this thread? Please squabble with Light Ice someplace else, isnt there a boxing ring thread or something? I do NOT require an answer to that Razor *pats your head*




I do not care if you want to Master.....I do NOT!

 

[dragonrazor]

What had that to do with this thread? Please squabble with Light Ice someplace else, isnt there a boxing ring thread or something? I do NOT require an answer to that Razor *pats your head*




I do not care if you want to Master.....I do NOT!

The thread is about things not to say to your partner while having sex. Trust me, you'll get the reasoning behind saying those two songs should not be sung during sex.