Are You Gay, Bi, Strait, or...
- Thread starter Brinnie
- Start date
comfort zone
Virgin
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2006
- Posts
- 25
Hi Brinnie
Im a 46yom married twice (my entire life), i find emotional attatchment only with opposite sex, am not attracted to men, yet i have a burning desire to try sex with another man. I only wish to experience the act, not interested in emotional attachment. Homosexual sex is about the only thing i havn't tried at this point and the thought of it is constantly on my mind. The difficulty i find is in meeting people like myself (attractive, in good shape, std free and able to proove it), willing to be open to the same desires. I find myself in a very homophobic region and even more homophobic profession, so i'm reluctant to approach anyone i know about the possibility of experimenting.
Sorry about the long dissertation. What would wanting the sex and not the emotion true gays have make me? Bi? Also, having discussed this with at least one other on-line friend who is bi, I was warned to be prepared to find out that i'm gay once i've taken the plunge (he's certain he is no longer interested in women after many years of marriage/straight lifestyle). Thanks for the opportunity to vent.
Im a 46yom married twice (my entire life), i find emotional attatchment only with opposite sex, am not attracted to men, yet i have a burning desire to try sex with another man. I only wish to experience the act, not interested in emotional attachment. Homosexual sex is about the only thing i havn't tried at this point and the thought of it is constantly on my mind. The difficulty i find is in meeting people like myself (attractive, in good shape, std free and able to proove it), willing to be open to the same desires. I find myself in a very homophobic region and even more homophobic profession, so i'm reluctant to approach anyone i know about the possibility of experimenting.
Sorry about the long dissertation. What would wanting the sex and not the emotion true gays have make me? Bi? Also, having discussed this with at least one other on-line friend who is bi, I was warned to be prepared to find out that i'm gay once i've taken the plunge (he's certain he is no longer interested in women after many years of marriage/straight lifestyle). Thanks for the opportunity to vent.
playwithlezli
play naughty or nice?
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2005
- Posts
- 3,286
I just love the lovin....
For long term relationships, it would be the person first, the body second, so it wouldn't matter if you were white, black, green, rich, poor, tall, short etc.
That being said-I go thru periods where I want one type of body or experience or another. Last week I was thinking that having sex with a transvestite with boobs could be fun, and even though I have only really been wanting to touch and be touched by women for a long time now, I still absolutely love watching men jack off.
If pansexual, non-monogamous is a nice way of saying slut-then that would be me.
I also would be just as happy to be out there fucking around without having a relationship portion of my life-I don't feel less fulfilled if I am not in one.
I haven't a clue on how to label myself and if I didn't think it might make it easier finding some RL action, I probably wouldn't even give it another thought.
For long term relationships, it would be the person first, the body second, so it wouldn't matter if you were white, black, green, rich, poor, tall, short etc.
That being said-I go thru periods where I want one type of body or experience or another. Last week I was thinking that having sex with a transvestite with boobs could be fun, and even though I have only really been wanting to touch and be touched by women for a long time now, I still absolutely love watching men jack off.
If pansexual, non-monogamous is a nice way of saying slut-then that would be me.
I also would be just as happy to be out there fucking around without having a relationship portion of my life-I don't feel less fulfilled if I am not in one.
I haven't a clue on how to label myself and if I didn't think it might make it easier finding some RL action, I probably wouldn't even give it another thought.
Prime
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- May 26, 2001
- Posts
- 1,361
Brinnie said:
how are you doing brinnie
the only cock i've had in my mouth is mine. and although i'd like to expand upon that experience, like one person said earlier, i desire no affection from a man, just the pure sexual desire. i've never really called myself bi, gay, straight, or anything. I just "am".
sorry, i wish i was more eloquent, but thats about all i know to say, otherwise, i'd just ramble on
Last edited:
neonflux
Out and about...
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2005
- Posts
- 4,233
I am queer, utterly queer
From an email, just tonight sent to a friend...
OK, I've had some wine in me, so here goes with the explanation of queerness involving warhol and mick jagger, although not foucault, who actually started
all of this sexual identity politics, despite his love of Roman/Pagan sexual fluidity...
Do you know of Martin Lawrence Galleries? They have a gallery hear, quite close to my apartment building - I often pass it - generally specialize in art prints, etc. for people who have money but don't quite know what to do with it. They have a large collection of Warhol silk screens. For a long time they had one of his series of Mick Jagger.
Mixed in with their "cock of the rock" masculinity, I think that all really big rock stars - Jagger, Axel Rose, Steven Tyler - have a strong "underlay" of femininity - it is an integral part of what makes their sexual personas so compelling. In this particular portrait, Warhol portrays Jagger with only his face and this swath of aqua color that drapes itself around Jagger's neck the way a woman's silk scarf would have done. What makes the work so incredible to me is that it is unmistakeably "Mick" but without one trace of masculinity - the only think left is that subtle feminine undertone that is part of his sexual personna.
I have never been a celebrity hound, but I would pass that piece and sometimes stare at it for an hour, for what it expressed. I truly believe that only a queer artist like Warhol could have produced that portrait, could have sensed that essential femininity and also been bold enough to portray it in a work of art. Had I had the money, I would have bought it - truly, I would have given my left nipple for it (and it's such a pretty nipple that's saying a lot).
This past year, when I was bored and looking for some fun at a conference that was held in a hotelnear Universal Studios, I went into the Martin Lawrence Gallery there and talked to a saleswoman about the piece. She was an utter philistine (it's rare for me to be so nasty) - they no longer have it. I tried to explain to her what interested me in that piece in particular but rather than listening to what I was saying, decided that my interest must be in Mick himself and tried to steer me first towards other Warhol pieces of Mick Jagger and then towards photographs of the man (not that I could have afforded any of it - wicked grin).
I guess my point here is that queerness really is more than just a label - it is a way of being in the world that includes all of this gender play and ambiguity, and that encompasses an aesthetic and world view that transcends cultural boundaries. When I am separated from it for a long time (as I often am at the conferences I must attend because of my job) I crave contact with it - it embraces me as though I am a
long-lost child coming home. And if I know where to search for it, I can find and recognize it whether I am in San Francisco, London, Mexico City, Berlin, Thailand, Budapest or Tokyo...
From an email, just tonight sent to a friend...
OK, I've had some wine in me, so here goes with the explanation of queerness involving warhol and mick jagger, although not foucault, who actually started
all of this sexual identity politics, despite his love of Roman/Pagan sexual fluidity...
Do you know of Martin Lawrence Galleries? They have a gallery hear, quite close to my apartment building - I often pass it - generally specialize in art prints, etc. for people who have money but don't quite know what to do with it. They have a large collection of Warhol silk screens. For a long time they had one of his series of Mick Jagger.
Mixed in with their "cock of the rock" masculinity, I think that all really big rock stars - Jagger, Axel Rose, Steven Tyler - have a strong "underlay" of femininity - it is an integral part of what makes their sexual personas so compelling. In this particular portrait, Warhol portrays Jagger with only his face and this swath of aqua color that drapes itself around Jagger's neck the way a woman's silk scarf would have done. What makes the work so incredible to me is that it is unmistakeably "Mick" but without one trace of masculinity - the only think left is that subtle feminine undertone that is part of his sexual personna.
I have never been a celebrity hound, but I would pass that piece and sometimes stare at it for an hour, for what it expressed. I truly believe that only a queer artist like Warhol could have produced that portrait, could have sensed that essential femininity and also been bold enough to portray it in a work of art. Had I had the money, I would have bought it - truly, I would have given my left nipple for it (and it's such a pretty nipple that's saying a lot).
This past year, when I was bored and looking for some fun at a conference that was held in a hotelnear Universal Studios, I went into the Martin Lawrence Gallery there and talked to a saleswoman about the piece. She was an utter philistine (it's rare for me to be so nasty) - they no longer have it. I tried to explain to her what interested me in that piece in particular but rather than listening to what I was saying, decided that my interest must be in Mick himself and tried to steer me first towards other Warhol pieces of Mick Jagger and then towards photographs of the man (not that I could have afforded any of it - wicked grin).
I guess my point here is that queerness really is more than just a label - it is a way of being in the world that includes all of this gender play and ambiguity, and that encompasses an aesthetic and world view that transcends cultural boundaries. When I am separated from it for a long time (as I often am at the conferences I must attend because of my job) I crave contact with it - it embraces me as though I am a
long-lost child coming home. And if I know where to search for it, I can find and recognize it whether I am in San Francisco, London, Mexico City, Berlin, Thailand, Budapest or Tokyo...
little cletus
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2005
- Posts
- 1,241
I tend to follow the continum theory. I lean towards the straight end of the spectrum, but i definetly am not 100%. I have never been with a man, and am not attracted to them in the least. But, like someone else said, i like what male genitalia can do. While roleplaying with my wife with strapons I will suck on them, or beg for cock. She wants to see me suck off and fuck a man, and the idea doesnt bother me (as long as i am the bottom). I love watching shemale porn. The combination of having a female shape and a cock is very exciting. I would love to be with a shemale. We have talked about our places on the sexual spectrum, and i think that i am best classified as "cock curious". For now though, her strap ons are going to suffice. The new feeldoe we bought is awsome. It should come in fleshtone so that it really would look like she had a dick.
BitterIchor
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2005
- Posts
- 287
Instead of writing an essay on the fluidity of the human sexuality and challenging every social and biological standard out of self-righteous defiance, I have the luxury of describing my sexuality with four words.
I am a lesbian.
I am a lesbian.
Nirvanadragones
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2005
- Posts
- 14,399
Oh i absolutely LOVE your post!!
Adroid!!!
BitterIchor said:
Adroid!!!
temp256
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2005
- Posts
- 548
Tymeless said:
This sums me up quite nicely.
I could probably go either way, but I would have a much more difficult time finding a guy I liked than a girl. Basically, I despise masculinity (especially in myself). I see myself falling for girly girls and effeminate men.
Then again, who knows?
Nirvanadragones
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2005
- Posts
- 14,399
neonflux said:
I adore the term queer,
I adore Warhol,
I adore Mick Jagger.
And I adore You.
Nirvanadragones
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2005
- Posts
- 14,399
whispered...
Now I see your face before me, I would launch a thousand ships
To bring your heart back to my island, as the sand beneath me slips
As I burn up in your presence and I know now how it feels
To be weakened like Achilles with you always at my heels
neonflux said:
Now I see your face before me, I would launch a thousand ships
To bring your heart back to my island, as the sand beneath me slips
As I burn up in your presence and I know now how it feels
To be weakened like Achilles with you always at my heels
estebanCOTS
Virgin
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2006
- Posts
- 13
Bisexual, but i didn't really come to terms with it till the last 3/4 months of 2004, having fell in love with this guy. I didn't tell my best friend of 18 years till last year just gone, just to get it clear in my head first, but i'm quite happy and comfortable with it.
I fell in love with a girl when i was 17 blahdy blahdy blah, but it wasn't untill i returned to college as a mature student of 21 that I started getting feeli9ngs towards the same sex, one same sex guy in particular. Unfortunetly i live in a hompophobic town in a very homophobic street where local teenagers presume if you're a guy and don't have some bimbo/slutard on your arm, then of course, obviously you must be gay.
It continued into the new millenium but really didn't get stronger until the dawn of the internet finally came into my life in 2001 (at 24 years old that it became more apparent and i started to wonder if prehaps the kids i were right. |It wasn't til;l yast year when i fell in love with this guy at work thast i realised what i was. know i still attarcted to woman as much as i am to me, i think to be totally gay the thoughts of sexual relations with woman would have to repel you, but they don't for me. I still have a very, very healthy appitite for both. And i'm quite happy with who and what i am and am just glad i can go on living my life without any doubts.
I fell in love with a girl when i was 17 blahdy blahdy blah, but it wasn't untill i returned to college as a mature student of 21 that I started getting feeli9ngs towards the same sex, one same sex guy in particular. Unfortunetly i live in a hompophobic town in a very homophobic street where local teenagers presume if you're a guy and don't have some bimbo/slutard on your arm, then of course, obviously you must be gay.
It continued into the new millenium but really didn't get stronger until the dawn of the internet finally came into my life in 2001 (at 24 years old that it became more apparent and i started to wonder if prehaps the kids i were right. |It wasn't til;l yast year when i fell in love with this guy at work thast i realised what i was. know i still attarcted to woman as much as i am to me, i think to be totally gay the thoughts of sexual relations with woman would have to repel you, but they don't for me. I still have a very, very healthy appitite for both. And i'm quite happy with who and what i am and am just glad i can go on living my life without any doubts.
playwithlezli
play naughty or nice?
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2005
- Posts
- 3,286
[[
So true, but so hard to explain!
Last night I went to a swingers club, had to tell a couple of guys that I only play with girls, went over fine, but led to a discussion on sexuality, I tried explaining queer, and why I thought that was a word that summed up my viewpoint on sexuality and where I fit in.
The men and women at the table patted my on the shoulder saying "that's ok dear, you're not queer, it's ok". I had to laugh as my point was missed entirely.
So true, but so hard to explain!
Last night I went to a swingers club, had to tell a couple of guys that I only play with girls, went over fine, but led to a discussion on sexuality, I tried explaining queer, and why I thought that was a word that summed up my viewpoint on sexuality and where I fit in.
The men and women at the table patted my on the shoulder saying "that's ok dear, you're not queer, it's ok". I had to laugh as my point was missed entirely.
neonflux
Out and about...
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2005
- Posts
- 4,233
Goddess I love you!
and i salute your bravery for going to a swingers club. would have loved to have joined you in the adventure!!! and thank you sharing, re: queerness!
and i salute your bravery for going to a swingers club. would have loved to have joined you in the adventure!!! and thank you sharing, re: queerness!
playwithlezli said:[[
So true, but so hard to explain!
Last night I went to a swingers club, had to tell a couple of guys that I only play with girls, went over fine, but led to a discussion on sexuality, I tried explaining queer, and why I thought that was a word that summed up my viewpoint on sexuality and where I fit in.
The men and women at the table patted my on the shoulder saying "that's ok dear, you're not queer, it's ok". I had to laugh as my point was missed entirely.
playwithlezli
play naughty or nice?
- Joined
- Dec 12, 2005
- Posts
- 3,286
neonflux said:and i salute your bravery for going to a swingers club. would have loved to have joined you in the adventure!!! and thank you sharing, re: queerness!
No, thank you for helping me to understand "queer" and where I am with that word.
The club was fun
check out my posting on the Swingers thread in the HT cafe if you want a few details!estebanCOTS
Virgin
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2006
- Posts
- 13
Thank-you Etoile,
sugarplumfairy_
Virgin
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2006
- Posts
- 7
Hi, I'm new.
I would probably categorize myself as being bi-curious. I am open to the thought of being sexually attracted to other women but for now I'd say kissing is as far as I'd ever go with them.
I would probably categorize myself as being bi-curious. I am open to the thought of being sexually attracted to other women but for now I'd say kissing is as far as I'd ever go with them.
webshooter69
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jan 1, 1970
- Posts
- 446
Welcum to Lit, ye of four posts..........
Just enjoy your stay here, and remember to do only what YOU feel comfortable with. Test your curiosity, be careful and HAVE FUN. REmember, labels are overused.
Most guys who have Bi curiosity find they enjoy some form of M/M sex and lots of MMF sex.
Just enjoy your stay here, and remember to do only what YOU feel comfortable with. Test your curiosity, be careful and HAVE FUN. REmember, labels are overused.
Most guys who have Bi curiosity find they enjoy some form of M/M sex and lots of MMF sex.
Ever since I started getting curious about sex at all, I've been a gay boy. I've seen straight porn movies, but keep looking at the guys and considering the girls lucky. I've "flirted" with women friends in chatrooms, but it's never really been arousing. In reality, I've only slept with other men, and have no interest in experimenting with a woman, even for a threesome.
Personally, I like the word 'queer'. Even when I was hearing it as an insult in school, it always had a little exciting edge to it. I wasn't 'strange', wasn't 'different', and I certainly wasn't 'wrong' - I'm just queer. It sounds more special than different, maybe even exotic or mysterious, and I'm not sure how better to describe it.
Personally, I like the word 'queer'. Even when I was hearing it as an insult in school, it always had a little exciting edge to it. I wasn't 'strange', wasn't 'different', and I certainly wasn't 'wrong' - I'm just queer. It sounds more special than different, maybe even exotic or mysterious, and I'm not sure how better to describe it.
miss muggins
Virgin
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2005
- Posts
- 4
ah, the identity question.
hey. i'm pretty new to this board.
the vast majority of my sexual/romantic experience has been het, but i've dated women, and enjoyed myself immensely. i was exclusive with a girl for a couple of years, but then she dumped me in a burger king and broke my heart. since then, i've stuck to the boys.
me, i don't identify as much of anything at all, except i know i'm not straight (to be honest the word bi makes my skin crawl, no offense to those who use it). i've never felt particularly at home in the lgbt/queer community. i've been told by lesbian friends that they would never even consider dating me, 'cause i'm not gay. in some ways it seems that often the straight community is more supportive, like sanitysux says. (although lots of straight guys seem to have a "whoa. you've done it with girls, right? that means you're bi. wanna have a pussy lickin' sesh with my gf?" kind of attitude. that doesn't feel so supportive.)
sanitysux- the not being gay enough thing- some of us girls get it, too.
hey. i'm pretty new to this board.
the vast majority of my sexual/romantic experience has been het, but i've dated women, and enjoyed myself immensely. i was exclusive with a girl for a couple of years, but then she dumped me in a burger king and broke my heart. since then, i've stuck to the boys.
me, i don't identify as much of anything at all, except i know i'm not straight (to be honest the word bi makes my skin crawl, no offense to those who use it). i've never felt particularly at home in the lgbt/queer community. i've been told by lesbian friends that they would never even consider dating me, 'cause i'm not gay. in some ways it seems that often the straight community is more supportive, like sanitysux says. (although lots of straight guys seem to have a "whoa. you've done it with girls, right? that means you're bi. wanna have a pussy lickin' sesh with my gf?" kind of attitude. that doesn't feel so supportive.)
sanitysux- the not being gay enough thing- some of us girls get it, too.
Sanitysux said:
Last edited:
Hello, Duh. Bi!
Married, but love to suck cock and get fucked!
bought my wife a nice pyrex strap on for Christmas, cause she's so hesitant to let another man into our lives after a bad experience.(He fell in love with me).
I keep beggin her to bring home other men or women and let's just have some fun...but she prefers it to be just us, so I live out my Bi-life mostly in fantasy.
Married, but love to suck cock and get fucked!
bought my wife a nice pyrex strap on for Christmas, cause she's so hesitant to let another man into our lives after a bad experience.(He fell in love with me).
I keep beggin her to bring home other men or women and let's just have some fun...but she prefers it to be just us, so I live out my Bi-life mostly in fantasy.
Similar threads
