Lord Pmann Wants to Discuss Weird Sex Stuff

[Lord Pmann]

@hotwords229_A let's get this business started. We will be trilionaires.

 

[sftopbottom]

I went to a gay leather convention in Cleveland called CLAW and attended an oral sex party the first night. I wore a new leather kilt with nothing underneath. I walked up to a seated older guy who looked me in the eyes as he reached under my kilt. He caressed my thighs, then wrapped his fist around my swollen dangling testicles. He squeezed hard and tugged, slightly painfully pulling downward on my nuts.

"Breathe!" he growled, "I'm not gonna let go, boy."

The man in me wanted to punch him, but sensing this, he gripped harder.

I took deep breaths.

For the next half hour so, he talked to me about letting go and giving in. I learned a lot. My dick drooled on his forearm. I didn't evven get off. went to my hotel with a lot to think about.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

@hotwords229_A let's get this business started. We will be trilionaires.

Or at least make dozens of dollars

 

[hotwords229_A]

Or at least make dozens of dollars

If we charge a trillion dollars per member, we only need two people to sign up!
I read one of those business books once.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I learned a lot. My dick drooled on his forearm. I didn't evven get off. went to my hotel with a lot to think about.

I’m curious what you learned and thought about.
I can’t tell if you were into this or regretful.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Zimbabwe dollars.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Zimbabwe dollars.

View attachment 2342134

I think that they now use that as toilet paper

As a side note, have you seen the money where they printed it and it immediately devalued so they printed directly over the top of it?

 

[Lord Pmann]

I think that they now use that as toilet paper

As a side note, have you seen the money where they printed it and it immediately devalued so they printed directly over the top of it?

Haha. No. I remember reading their inflation rate was like 50 billion percent MONTHLY.

They still have some outrageous inflation problems from what I've seen. I don't really have a concept of how that works though. I cannot fathom that kind of inflation.

 

[sftopbottom]

I’m curious what you learned and thought about.
I can’t tell if you were into this or regretful.

at first it was crazy and new. It's a professional industry and I learned/contributed a lot.

I don't regret it, not at all. I do wish I'd have moved on sooner, since the industry was winding down a lot, and I was putting off other pursuits.

In terms of leaving the biz, it CAN be very difficult to put porn on your resume for some positions.

I'm now self-employed, happy, and doing well. I have fond memories.

 

[sftopbottom]

I’m curious what you learned and thought about.
I can’t tell if you were into this or regretful.

... I was in a sexualized situation so decided to go with it. I breathed. I fought the urge to surrender. I stood my ground and that made it hurt more. He wanted me on my knees and was trying to get me to submit. I gritted through it, and my dick became super hard. He relented. Tugged more. Relented. He was speaking softly about letting go...doing what I'm told, etc.

He had a harem of slave boys and was taking auditions. I wasn't interested in that but I was flattered. He eventually let go, stood, and hugged me gently. All good.

It was good clean fun. I confirmed that I'm not really into bdsm.

 

[hotwords229_A]

... I was in a sexualized situation so decided to go with it. I breathed. I fought the urge to surrender. I stood my ground and that made it hurt more. He wanted me on my knees and was trying to get me to submit. I gritted through it, and my dick became super hard. He relented. Tugged more. Relented. He was speaking softly about letting go...doing what I'm told, etc.

He had a harem of slave boys and was taking auditions. I wasn't interested in that but I was flattered. He eventually let go, stood, and hugged me gently. All good.

It was good clean fun. I confirmed that I'm not really into bdsm.

I flirted with a girl at a bar once.
That’s the closest story I have to yours.

 

[Lord Pmann]

I flirted with a girl at a bar once.
That’s the closest story I have to yours.

I’ve done a little better. I flirted with a girl AND got kicked in the dick.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

got kicked in the dick.

Kinky

 

[SassySheDevil]

You are more the founder of the Vacuum Violators Club.

Which leads me to a new thought, how have the good people at Fleshlight not invented a ShopVac attachment for their product?

Think of the possibilities! An Onlyfans page where hot guys teach DIY projects in their garage and at the end of the show they fuck a ShopVac with Fleshlight attachment with, possibly, a power Sharpie in their ass.

Women would sign up for that page in droves. They love DIY!

This idea is pure !

@hotwords229_A let's get this business started. We will be trilionaires.

I will subscribe!!!

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

I recently discovered the “Sharpie Fun” thread. I had no idea a Sharpie was such a filthy writing utensil.
I also feel like I haven’t had the proper amount of things in my ass. Just a finger once or twice, but it didn’t really do anything for me.

I have stuck my dick in a Shop Vac, but, unlike Pmann, I chickened out immediately. As soon as the suction pulled me in I pulled the plug fearing it might rip my dick off.

I never went back.

I have can think of at least 10 household items that would make a better sex toy than a Sharpie and double that for a shop vac

 

[aussiegeekygal]

I have can think of at least 10 household items that would make a better sex toy than a Sharpie and double that for a shop vac

Go on then...

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

And you know my low point.

Is there a lower low than the shop vac or ponies?

 

[Lord Pmann]

I have can think of at least 10 household items that would make a better sex toy than a Sharpie and double that for a shop vac

I’m interested to hear shop vac replacements.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Is there a lower low than the shop vac or ponies?

Oh yes.

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Go on then...

Cucumber, carrot, hairbrush, early 2000s Nokia phones, muscle roller stick thingy, small kid cup, bottle of bubbles, prescription pill bottle, duck taped barbie doll, lego tower (superglued of course)...

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

I’m interested to hear shop vac replacements.

View attachment 2342496

Like literally everything that's not a drill or an electrical socket?

Pie, cake, women's underwear, a box, a bowl, a pillow, paper...

 

[Lord Pmann]

Cucumber, carrot, hairbrush, early 2000s Nokia phones, muscle roller stick thingy, small kid cup, bottle of bubbles, prescription pill bottle, duck taped barbie doll, lego tower (superglued of course)...

Are these Sharpie replacements, I presume?

I need to see the 20 replacements for shop vacs. I bet I’ve fucked a large majority of them and I feel confident whatever you say won’t be better than a shop vac.

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Oh yes.

https://media.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2...F9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/NipFetnQOuKhW/giphy.gif

 

[Lord Pmann]

Like literally everything that's not a drill or an electrical socket?

Pie, cake, women's underwear, a box, a bowl, a pillow, paper...

Pie- that’s a myth that is perpetuated by a movie. Unlike vaginas, pies are solely for eating, not fucking. I’ve never fucked a pie.

Cake- I’ve never fucked a cake but the same rule applies, although I believe the most fuckable cake is tres leches. Which, if you fuck it long enough, it’ll be cuatro leches.

Women’s underwear- you can’t really fuck them. You can use them to masturbate. But not fuck.

A box- not as good as a shop vac. It has sharp edges and there is nothing there once you slide your dick inside. It does not feel good.

A bowl- I’ve never fucked a bowl. But I can’t even wrap my head around the bowl fucking logistics.

A pillow- this is the best choice on your list. It’s fuckable, but it just lays there.

Paper- no. Maybe origami. But not just a plain sheet of paper.

Shop vac > all your suggestions

 

[Lord Pmann]

https://media.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2...F9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/NipFetnQOuKhW/giphy.gif

Haha. Oh god. I’ll have to think of the next audio.

But OP… your interest in my stories makes me think I’ve finally found porn that you like. You’re welcome.