"To keep the review thread clean..."

[greenmountaineer]

My thanks to 1201, butters, Harry, pelegrino, and UYS for their comments regarding "A Night in the Life of St. Lizzie."

Angeline once commented that the poem you posted and thought was so good almost always has a few chinks you can see when you re-visit it six months later. "A Night..." is one those. In fact, many of my recent submissions are, and I find that I enjoy re-doing some dated mediocre poem as much as I do as an original.

 

[HarryHill]

Thanks for the comments on my last

 

[pelegrino]

Thanks to 1201 for commenting on "Each Other's Salt".
I agree, too much of a song to be of value without the music.

Thanks to HoneyAdored for favoring me as an author.

 

[twelveoone]

hey, I did the last one, someone go recommend something
don't forget GM's
his has a tres cool bass part-at least that's the way I read it

 

[todski28]

hey, I did the last one, someone go recommend something
don't forget GM's
his has a tres cool bass part-at least that's the way I read it

Oneria's??

 

[twelveoone]

Oneria's??

got an E, he is on my shit list for being so comment shy
Really, I was not in the mood, I think I left one comment that qualifies as actual criticism one of Demure's

 

[twelveoone]

no two, magnetron's
but GM's is worth a mention
Uncanny Valli-I crack myself up
Jersey
my governor is bigger than your state
Suck on that
Texas

 

[pelegrino]

Many thanks to 1201 and Oldbear63 for commenting on "Our Own Remains Of A Day".

1201, I agree that "unusual-usual" is a week rhyme as it stands. I have not set it to music yet. I keep it cause sometimes it can prove a strength depending on the setting (I'll never know before I do it), if not, then I can change it (if it does not alter completely the meaning, of course).
"Nistia": I tried to explain it in a foot note but perhaps it is not adequate.
It is a greek word meaning "not eating" but more formally in an Orthodox Christian sense it means lent, (abstention from eating, especially meat, and in this case it means the 40 days big lent before Easter).
I use it to rhyme with another greek word, "asteia" which means jokes.
They both help the narrative as the narrator at the same time is joking about not eating and also teaching greek to a foreign person.


Many thanks to Burqueno for favoring me as an author.

 

[butters]

thanks to twelve, tods and harry for your reads/thoughts on 'one rider less'.

leaving it up, but plan on refining it since i'm not happy with it. i shouldn't have posted it so lare but waited and looked with clear eyes. hoping for some more feedback to help me decide what exactly to do with it.

harry, my love, i deeply appreciate your honesty.
tods, don't be a silly bugger.
twelve - re barn http://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=56840662&postcount=752

 

[todski28]

Thank you greenmountaineer and honey adored for your kind comments on my poem

Swirls of honey

To gm the comma at the end I was trying to makw it appear like a drop of honey but it is too ambiguous. I was going to put in more than one, but I thought less could be more. As to the word sullied I was trying to use it as a heavy handed guide for the piece but it is pretty self explanatory with out it. Your time is appreciated.

 

[twelveoone]

Thank you greenmountaineer and honey adored for your kind comments on my poem

Swirls of honey

To gm the comma at the end I was trying to makw it appear like a drop of honey but it is too ambiguous. I was going to put in more than one, but I thought less could be more. As to the word sullied I was trying to use it as a heavy handed guide for the piece but it is pretty self explanatory with out it. Your time is appreciated.

That is one of the major reasons I get pissed at the serial submitting shelve stuffers. You had a poem over there? Now how the fuck can you find it?

Note: excess alliteration

 

[todski28]

That is one of the major reasons I get pissed at the serial submitting shelve stuffers. You had a poem over there? Now how the fuck can you find it?

Note: excess alliteration

You sometimes scare me with what you see, it was deliberately written with bursts of two and three alliterations for this reason

http://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=56819802&postcount=5

 

[twelveoone]

You sometimes scare me with what you see, it was deliberately written with bursts of two and three alliterations for this reason

http://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=56819802&postcount=5

nah, four is excess, and if I really wanted to hiss I would have done more of this.

 

[twelveoone]

Thank you greenmountaineer and honey adored for your kind comments on my poem

Swirls of honey

To gm the comma at the end I was trying to makw it appear like a drop of honey but it is too ambiguous. I was going to put in more than one, but I thought less could be more. As to the word sullied I was trying to use it as a heavy handed guide for the piece but it is pretty self explanatory with out it. Your time is appreciated.

commented found it, as per usual contrarian, and inflammatory as my comments usually are
just kidding - I think I fived, but I'm not sure I pressed the button. A bit rushed.

 

[Ashesh9]

Thank You , Oldbear , Tod & Magnetron for your appreciative comments on Electoral Regime Change & Man vs Dynasty .

 

[todski28]

commented found it, as per usual contrarian, and inflammatory as my comments usually are
just kidding - I think I fived, but I'm not sure I pressed the button. A bit rushed.

Thanks for the comment on swirls of honey 1201 I felt the Sonics were out but couldn't figure out what I was missing and exactly what I was doing, but the "su" sound tied in with the ending and probably could have been carried through.
Thanks also to matryoshaka for your comment, it made sense to me for the word sullied at the beginning but has caused a bit of duality me thinks.

Also thanks to ash and oldbear for their contributions

 

[twelveoone]

Thanks for the comment on swirls of honey 1201 I felt the Sonics were out but couldn't figure out what I was missing and exactly what I was doing, but the "su" sound tied in with the ending and probably could have been carried through.
Thanks also to matryoshaka for your comment, it made sense to me for the word sullied at the beginning but has caused a bit of duality me thinks.

Also thanks to ash and oldbear for their contributions

Follow it though, anyway, I'm impressed with the progress

 

[pelegrino]

Thanks, todski28 for your kind comment on "Exit With A Bow".

 

[Angeline]

Thank you to Ashesh, Magnetron, and 1201 for commenting on my dino poem, Last Tango in Buenos Aires. Twelve I think you're right about the underline. I was concerned that people wouldn't emphasize the word when they read, but I should know better. That kinda stuff rarely makes a difference. And thanks, too, to all who read for giving it some of your time.

 

[HarryHill]

Thanks to butter and gm for your resent comments and a suggestion that brought a moment of clarity and a few tighter words
..
now I gotta go find Angelines new one.

 

[twelveoone]

Thanks to butter and gm for your resent comments and a suggestion that brought a moment of clarity and a few tighter words
..
now I gotta go find Angelines new one.

it is about ten down from the serial submission - no commenter section
right on top of Dick Shore's fantasy section.

 

[Matryoshka]

Once a poem is posted, is there a way to go back and edit it? Am I missing something obvious?

 

[Tsotha]

Once a poem is posted, is there a way to go back and edit it? Am I missing something obvious?

As far as I know, you just submit it again with "edited" added to the title. This way, you keep whatever votes / comments you had.

Edit: better make it "EDITED", all caps. Also, it might be a good idea to annex a note (in the "Notes" field in the submission page, the one used for special instructions to the site admin).

 

[Matryoshka]

As far as I know, you just submit it again with "edited" added to the title. This way, you keep whatever votes / comments you had.

Edit: better make it "EDITED", all caps. Also, it might be a good idea to annex a note (in the "Notes" field in the submission page, the one used for special instructions to the site admin).

Thank you! It was driving me nuts that I couldn't improve the ones I've already posted. And the anal part of me won't let me self add anything new until I'm happy with those.

 

[Tsotha]

Thank you! It was driving me nuts that I couldn't improve the ones I've already posted. And the anal part of me won't let me self add anything new until I'm happy with those.

Notice that "old" poems don't get much exposure. Stories seem to get a bit more of a long tail, with readers finding them through tags, the search page, and so on, but as far as I can tell this isn't true with poems. I guess I'm the only one who prefers going through the submissions page, entry by entry. The poetry hubs are a mess, four to five days and PUFF, the "new" poem goes into limbo.

My point is, if you're making big modifications, and want people to look at them again, it might be worthwhile to remove them, and then sub it again, such that they go into the new poems page again.