Post a reason why the person above would appear in the evening breaking news

" ... and as our closing piece tonight, local boob Deckard wrote, produced, and starred in a porno. After three weeks at the venue the film actually lost money. Deckard has since hidden himself in shame and could not be reached for comment."

Captain Underpants is a cartoon based on him.
 
He set the record this past New Years for largest firecracker exploded in his ass.

There was video of him running naked from his exploded Florida trailer after lighting his farts in fire, and they were trying to compare with the streaker from the Super Bowl to see if he was also the streaker.
 
There was video of him running naked from his exploded Florida trailer after lighting his farts in fire, and they were trying to compare with the streaker from the Super Bowl to see if he was also the streaker.

loitering in the park with his dick in his hand
 
She perfected time travel, went back to see herself as a child, but accidently ran over herself and alas, is no more.

Got locked in a zoo and was rescued just in the nick of time from a backed up, amorous lemur.
 
DeckardNYC made the prime-time news with his sensational 'Instant Poodle' powder recipe. "Just add water. Cold water. Poodles react badly to the boiling kind." were the first words our reporters got from the eccentric individual.
 
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